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Most useless Marvel character

post #1 of 23
9/14/00 at 12:00pm
Thread Starter 
While the list could be infinite with the endless stable of X-characters, my vote would be for the incredible forgotten wonder: RAZORBACK! This guy was the ultimate. His mutant power allowed him to drive or pilot any vehicle. That's IT! Let's see, would that ability allow me to be a superhero? No, I didn't think so. Although I could skillfully steer my car into supervillains who happen to stand paralyzed in the middle of the road. Wait, he also has an incredible "hog's head" that he wears which can give off electrical shocks. How this does not effect him is anyone's guess.

Oh, one more useless character: ROB LIEFELD.
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post #2 of 23
9/14/00 at 2:47pm
The merchandising department. They always pick the wrong people to produce things.
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post #3 of 23
9/14/00 at 4:10pm
I'd have to say Marrow, Maggott, and pretty much every other character introduced in X-MEN books for the past, oh, ten years or so...
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post #4 of 23
9/14/00 at 5:31pm
Thread Starter 
I believe that the x-problems could be fixed with the addition of a few more brooding anti-heroes and dangling plotlines.

Oh, and also a Maggot twelve issue maxi-series. can't get enough of that great concept. Is Alex Ross available to illustrate it?

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post #5 of 23
9/14/00 at 7:15pm
That's Pool Boy's younger brother, right?
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post #6 of 23
9/15/00 at 5:11am
Nomad.

Nuff said...
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post #7 of 23
9/15/00 at 10:46am
Wasn't Slapstick a Keith Giffen creation?
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post #8 of 23
9/15/00 at 1:32pm
Nomad...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!! In a continuity that already has Johnny Blaze and the Punisher, they introduce...NOMAD! Then they have the audicity to make it a weekly TV show starring Lorenzo Lamas called 'Renegade'!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!


Oh, wait, I don't mean laughter, I mean "What the fuck were they thinking?"
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post #9 of 23
9/15/00 at 2:50pm
Thread Starter 
Yes, it's true. Nomad became a disillusioned loner, cruising around America and fighting evil with a sawed-off shotgun and a 80's hair band look. He did manage to keep his little stun discs. This was one lame character, and I must admit I have the first few issues of his short-lived series. The art was kind of quirky, but the concept was just too bad.
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post #10 of 23
9/15/00 at 5:02pm
I, too, have the first several issues. Forgive me, o lord...
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post #11 of 23
9/15/00 at 7:11pm
The Beyonder was pretty useless after a while. Jubilee seems to be just a Kitty replacement although I don't read X-Men anymore so I may be wrong.

Matt
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post #12 of 23
9/16/00 at 4:53pm
Did he ever eat that baby, or what?
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post #13 of 23
9/16/00 at 5:08pm
Spider-Man.
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post #14 of 23
9/18/00 at 1:25pm
Where to start?

The Paladin
Silver Sable
The New Warriors
The Absorbing Man
Any X-characters introduced after 1997
ALL the Avengers and reserve Avengers except for Cap, Iron Man, Thor, The Wasp, Hank Pym, The Vision, Scarlet Witch, Hawkeye, and The Beast.
Power Pack
Though I enjoyed their book the first time out...at least these days, Power Man and Iron Fist
Any and all Hulk villains


[This message has been edited by mikah912 (edited 09-18-2000).]
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post #15 of 23
9/18/00 at 2:28pm
Thread Starter 
How could you disparage the wonderful cast of the New Warriors? Let's look at these classic heroes: Night Thrasher. He was the meanest skateboardin' hero the Marvel Universe ever witnessed. His freakin' board had a retractable razor edge and was bullet proof!!! How could you not be impressed with that?!?!?! And how about Speedball? He was so, so...okay, he was really stupid. But look at the other characters: Namorita (wings on ankles=spiffy character) Nova, the human rocket (insert joke here), Firestar and Marvel Boy/Justice/Stupid Character. What a line-up!

But don't forget the great additions later on: Turbo, Rage, The Girl With Leg Braces, Dr. Diversity, etc. etc.

That's some raging creativity there. Useless? I think not...
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post #16 of 23
9/18/00 at 3:52pm
Funny! BTW, Firestar and Marvel Boy also double on my list as Avengers. Not reserves either.....how sad.
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post #17 of 23
9/18/00 at 5:43pm
Thread Starter 
Does anyone remember the first appearance of the New Warriors in the pages of Thor? If I recall, they were fighting the Juggernaut (like they would be a big challenge for him.)

I believe this issued marked the height of lameness for Marvel Boy/Justice. When Thor was injured by Juggernaut, M.B. wanted to move him to safety. As I recall, M.B. had trouble moving Thor, saying he was extremely heavy. Wow, a telekinetic that has trouble moving around a few hundred pounds! He ought to give super criminals a fit! Hope he never comes up against a Weight Watchers crime spree. Ugh!
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post #18 of 23
9/18/00 at 5:45pm
Were the New Warriors those guys where they were all different ethnicities and the black dude was a skateboarder? HA! I remember them featured in Punisher and I remember soiling myself with laughter, while pissing and shitting in terror.
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post #19 of 23
9/18/00 at 8:00pm
I think not.
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post #20 of 23
9/18/00 at 10:46pm
Which guy is Paladin? What's his super power?
Is he an Avenger or something?

Matt
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post #21 of 23
9/19/00 at 1:12am
Jay and Silent Bob...
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post #22 of 23
9/19/00 at 9:20am
Thread Starter 
Paladin is a mercenary. He has slight super-strength (maybe able to lift half a ton?) He also carries a nifty "stun" pistol. That's right, he's a mercenary with a stun gun. Feeeaaaarrr him!!!!!! What could be more fear inducing...an assasin with a paintball gun?

He's popped up in a lot of books, from Captain America to SpiderMan to the Avengers. If you couldn't guess by now, he's one of the plethora of second stringers at Marvel. Where's the Scourge when you need him? Justice is Served!!!!!!!!!!!!


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post #23 of 23
9/19/00 at 11:48am
I liked the Shrike. First McFarlane issue that I ever bought. This blonde-haired posturing baddie comes in, fights Spidey, gets beat.

Has he ever returned?
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