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Nerd Goes On Kill-Crazy Rampage

post #1 of 27
Thread Starter 
<a href="http://www.cnn.com/2003/US/West/06/30/supermarket.killings.ap/index.html" target="_blank">http://www.cnn.com/2003/US/West/06/30/supermarket.killings.ap/index.html</a>

IRVINE, California (AP) -- Police shot and killed a sword-wielding man described by relatives as schizophrenic after he slashed and killed two former co-workers and wounded three other people at a supermarket where he used to bag groceries.

About 40 to 50 shoppers ran from the store shortly after 9:30 a.m. Sunday as police went in to subdue Joseph Hunter Parker, who was armed with a samurai-style sword and wearing a beret and trenchcoat, said police Cmdr. Jeff Noble.

The 30-year-old man confronted an officer before fellow officers shot him, said Lt. Jeff Love. Parker was taken to the hospital and did not survive. One of the wounded was an Albertsons employee and two others were customers, police said. Police did not release the names of the dead or wounded.

Parker had been diagnosed as schizophrenic, his mother, Susan Davis, said in an interview Sunday from rural Ford, Virginia. He also was a volunteer firefighter and emergency medical technician.

"He was not in a good state at all," Davis said, adding she had not spoken to Parker in about a year. "He said voices were telling him to do bad things."

Davis said Parker, who moved to California about five years ago, collected swords and was a fan of the "Highlander" film and television series in which the hero is a swordsman.

"I'm just sorry about what happened," Davis said.


A victim's relative weeps outside an Albertsons supermarket in Irvine, California.
Parker's former co-workers said he quit his job bagging groceries about two weeks ago after working at Albertsons for about two years.

"I never felt threatened, but he was just a really odd man," said coworker Mark Ming, 26. "He would have full conversations with himself. He obviously had problems, but he was respectful toward customers."

Parker's sister, Heather Parker, 28, of Anaheim, said she hasn't spoken to her brother in several months.

"He was alone and he was very mistreated his whole life," she said in a telephone interview. "He was being treated for schizophrenia. He's never been in trouble. He didn't drink, didn't use drugs. He was kind."

Love called the attacks an aberration in the quiet city 40 miles southeast of Los Angeles, which he said averages less than one murder a year. About 143,000 people live here.
post #2 of 27
Of course he killed people....After all, There can be only one.
post #3 of 27
I just love the title for this thread. It made me laugh, so much more entertaining than reading the article.

Well, I'm off of work and now it's time to start "binge & purge" drinking. I just hope to avoid the "purge".
post #4 of 27
sad happens.
post #5 of 27
When I heard about a samuri sword rampage in California on the news for some reason CTDelude came to mind.
post #6 of 27
This story saddens and disgusts me.

He wore a BERET?! This guy has no concept of fashion!
post #7 of 27
Quote:
otisthecat:
When I heard about a samuri sword rampage in California on the news for some reason CTDelude came to mind.
LOL.

Well I don't have a sword yet. But I guess there is now another samurai sword on the market.

(Oooooooooooooh!!) wink
post #8 of 27
But.... they KILLED him!?!

How do you decapitate someone with a gun?

stupid.
post #9 of 27
Quote:
Breathless of the Un variety:
But.... they KILLED him!?!

How do you decapitate someone with a gun?

stupid.
Eh?
post #10 of 27
Quote:
CTDeLude:
Quote:
Breathless of the Un variety:
But.... they KILLED him!?!

How do you decapitate someone with a gun?

stupid.
Eh?
Highlander reference.
post #11 of 27
I have never heard of someone going on a rampage with a samurai sword.
post #12 of 27
Maybe this will cause them to stop making those fucking awful movies.
post #13 of 27
For some reason, I keep seeing Ferris Bueller with a sword...
post #14 of 27
Quote:
Devil Unicron:
For some reason, I keep seeing Ferris Bueller with a sword...
And another pitch meeting is born...
post #15 of 27
Quote:
otisthecat:
Quote:
CTDeLude:
Quote:
Breathless of the Un variety:
But.... they KILLED him!?!

How do you decapitate someone with a gun?

stupid.
Eh?
Highlander reference.
Man and I was such a fan of the show.

Did these things ever come out on DVD by the way? (series)
post #16 of 27
Quote:
DJ Dylan is Furiously Masturbating:
I have never heard of someone going on a rampage with a samurai sword.
It's happened in the UK before.
post #17 of 27
Quote:
Breathless of the Un variety:
But.... they KILLED him!?!

How do you decapitate someone with a gun?

stupid.
Highlander meets Dirty Harry.

"Did I quicken six times or only five?"
post #18 of 27
Quote:
Devil Unicron:
For some reason, I keep seeing Ferris Bueller with a sword...
Don't forget that goofy look on his face when he turns to the camera.
post #19 of 27
The mental picture of a guy in a beret and a trench coat wielding a samurai sword made me chuckle.
post #20 of 27
where the fuck was hot shot cop Marion Cobretti? The chief is gonna have his ass for this .

post #21 of 27
We have this guy in Australia that has gone on a sword weilding "Highlander" induced rampage a couple of times down in Melbourne I think he was - but he got himself properly dressed for the part in full Scottish dress with a kilt and all the trimmings - I remember thinking he looked like an extra from Braveheart in the newspaper.

I'm pretty sure he hasn't harmed anybody as he mormally tries to attack cars on freeways or major roads.

The cops just normally turn up and pepper spray him to the ground. Case Closed.
post #22 of 27
Quote:
CTDeLude:
Man and I was such a fan of the show.

Did these things ever come out on DVD by the way? (series)
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B00006LPCK/ref=pd_sim_dv_1/103-9804087-9802232?v=glance&s=dvd" target="_blank">Season One</a>

<a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B00009MEJT/103-9804087-9802232?vi=glance" target="_blank">Season Two</a>
post #23 of 27
Quote:
Buckshot:
We have this guy in Australia that has gone on a sword weilding "Highlander" induced rampage a couple of times down in Melbourne I think he was - but he got himself properly dressed for the part in full Scottish dress with a kilt and all the trimmings - I remember thinking he looked like an extra from Braveheart in the newspaper.

I'm pretty sure he hasn't harmed anybody as he mormally tries to attack cars on freeways or major roads.

The cops just normally turn up and pepper spray him to the ground. Case Closed.
Funniest thing I've read all week.
post #24 of 27
Quote:
Buckshot:
We have this guy in Australia that has gone on a sword weilding "Highlander" induced rampage a couple of times down in Melbourne I think he was - but he got himself properly dressed for the part in full Scottish dress with a kilt and all the trimmings - I remember thinking he looked like an extra from Braveheart in the newspaper.

I'm pretty sure he hasn't harmed anybody as he mormally tries to attack cars on freeways or major roads.

The cops just normally turn up and pepper spray him to the ground. Case Closed.
Hehehehe. I want to move to Austrailia now. You guys even have cool psychos.
post #25 of 27
Buckshot, that must be a sight to see. So funny.
post #26 of 27
Quote:
Buckshot:
We have this guy in Australia that has gone on a sword weilding "Highlander" induced rampage a couple of times down in Melbourne I think he was - but he got himself properly dressed for the part in full Scottish dress with a kilt and all the trimmings - I remember thinking he looked like an extra from Braveheart in the newspaper.

I'm pretty sure he hasn't harmed anybody as he mormally tries to attack cars on freeways or major roads.

The cops just normally turn up and pepper spray him to the ground. Case Closed.
One of the arrests was on Real TV or one of the other "caught on tape shows". Unless more than one guy in Australia plays Highlander in the streets.
post #27 of 27
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Kronos of the Caribbean:
"Did I quicken six times or only five?"
Bwahahahahahaha
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CHUD.com Community › Forums › CULTURE, HUMOR, & FREE FORM › Misc. Culture › Nerd Goes On Kill-Crazy Rampage