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Can't BELIEVE I'm doing this, but I need your help, guys...

post #1 of 72
12/21/00 at 6:43pm
Thread Starter 
Okay, here's the deal.

My lord and savior "Rowdy" Roddy Piper just started a web endeavor. It's a fair to middling site right now-needs some work. BUT-he's pulled an inaugural contest where people try for comedy, he picks the best ten entries, and the fans choose the winner.

I'm one of the finalists, and I'd like you guys to help me.

Go HERE
www.roddyraw.com/Home/ChrismasContest/body_chrismascontest.html

VOTE for my entry. It's NUMBER 2.

The winner of the contest gets five bills, AND PIPER CALLS THEM TO TELL THEM SO.

And I have plans to make that a pretty productive call, if you smell what the Pollock's cookin'...

So please-VOTE FOR ME! The contest goes until the 24th.

Thanks guys.

Jason

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post #2 of 72
12/21/00 at 7:11pm
After HAM has done so much for us, this is the least you can do for him. Remember the Alamo, my brothers.

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EAT THIS
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post #3 of 72
12/21/00 at 7:37pm
Thread Starter 
Thanks, grabass and Devin-I really appreciate it.

And Danke, Johnny.
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post #4 of 72
12/21/00 at 8:24pm
I voted, then deleted the cookie and voted again.

On both computers.

And mama don't like tattle tales...
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post #5 of 72
12/21/00 at 8:45pm
I vote for ya and I am going after the cookie right now
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post #6 of 72
12/21/00 at 9:02pm
I gladly cast my vote.
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post #7 of 72
12/22/00 at 12:17am
None of those entries were funny, but I voted for you anyway HAM.

According to the results, my vote just put you even with #9 at 45 to 45.

Gee, I hope they aren't logging IP's...
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post #8 of 72
12/22/00 at 4:02am
Thread Starter 
Why thank you, GDog-truth be told, I didn't think mine was terribly amusing either, but I did make the dialogue sound like it might come out of the people who said it.

I felt like the entire concept of four tiny word balloons was incredibly limiting. If given the option to do a little short story, I'd've come up with a tale of demented Holiday cheer to rival the bestselling Christmas Chaos.

As I stated in an e-mail a few of you may have received-the pickings must have been slim-because I didn't even think mine would get noticed. There must have been 11 entries.

Still-keep voting, kids-and thanks.
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post #9 of 72
12/22/00 at 4:18am
HAM now leads in the quest to be able to look under Roddy Piper's kilt and win the big bucks. I just voted again.
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post #10 of 72
12/22/00 at 5:33am
Thread Starter 
I wanna' look under YOUR kilt and win the big-

Naah-I just really wanna' look up your kilt.
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post #11 of 72
12/22/00 at 6:47am
You're getting an unusually large number of votes from a small financial company in London, England. Must be some rogue support guy out there taking advantage of the amount of IP addresses kicking around doing sod all...
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post #12 of 72
12/22/00 at 1:02pm
In addition to that company in London, there's a small photography company in MA that's also on HAM's side

I'm doing the cookie thing too today, I did it yesterday a coupla times, fret not dear HAM, you shall win
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post #13 of 72
12/22/00 at 1:41pm
Ok, so I just bumped HAM up by about 8 votes and somebody keeps outvoting me for #9! Im on a mission now, it's pissing me off dammit!

A little assistance would be appreciated on this Friday before XMas, c'mon, someone out there must be slacking (or in my case trying to slack) today at work......

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post #14 of 72
12/22/00 at 1:45pm
I voted too. Girlcreeture, you are STICKER QUEEN!
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post #15 of 72
12/22/00 at 3:32pm
I voted for you.

------------------
U2Shark
"Santa's laughter mocks the poor "
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post #16 of 72
12/22/00 at 3:47pm
Thread Starter 
Thank you, everyone. Just fielded a couple of e-mails from the Rowdy One this morning-and let me tell you, I am fucking giddy like a litle girl.
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post #17 of 72
12/22/00 at 3:47pm
YAY! Nick do you likey? I'm a sucker for stickers, it's a girlie thing I think

Im STILL voting BTW, HAM will win this, and dear Jason, you better tape record the conversation and tell him girlcreeture says "hi" 'kay?
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post #18 of 72
12/22/00 at 4:22pm
Thread Starter 
I will try.

I left that wiretap around here somewhere...
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post #19 of 72
12/22/00 at 5:16pm
Thread Starter 
Heh-heh. Thankee, Angelus.

Keep it up, 'cause apparently, the other person is using trickery. Because that one stinks worse than mine.

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post #20 of 72
12/22/00 at 6:27pm
That FUCKER is so going down goddammit, whoever it is they suck.

I keep deleting my cookies and relogging but now,I have to vote twice before it'll take the vote. Arg! Im trying HAM, but Im not at work much longer.....
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post #21 of 72
12/22/00 at 11:46pm
Girlcreeture, you are an angel.

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What do I put here? I am not sure if me computer has UBB's.
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post #22 of 72
12/23/00 at 1:22am
I voted for ya -- post what the Rowdy One says when he calls you, mmkay?
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post #23 of 72
12/23/00 at 2:55am
Thread Starter 
If I do indeed win, you may count on it.

Thank you all so much.
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post #24 of 72
12/23/00 at 2:59am
Shit, tell him CHUD.COM loves him and that I mentioned him in my column that's in the new issue of SciFi Magazine.
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post #25 of 72
12/23/00 at 3:23am
I went to vote some more, but it stopped letting me after 4 votes.

You're behind by 16 votes HAM!
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post #26 of 72
12/23/00 at 3:24am
Ive been voting every time i visit the boards Think Ill go somemore...Good luck!

Who is Rowdy" Roddy Piper anyway?

[This message has been edited by Shelby (edited 12-23-2000).]
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post #27 of 72
12/23/00 at 11:21am
Thread Starter 
Do you realize that we are all one step closer to seeing Nick Nunziata's Devil's Head on our TV's, surrounded by multicolored morphing fluids, as some shitty rave-up "trance" plays in the background?

As he wispers...

"I am Sci-Fi..."

I, for one, can't wait.
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post #28 of 72
12/23/00 at 11:52am
It's stopping me from voting and I thought I knew how to remove the cookie. That fucker! It makes me wait to ne able to vote. I don't understand. Now I am on a vendetta.
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post #29 of 72
12/23/00 at 4:50pm
Thread Starter 
Yeah-I'm the big stickler for grammar, and if your gonna' submit something lots of people read, then it should be done properly, in my mind.

That said-accidents happen, and I'm as prone as the next guy, but...

Like said-I didn't think mine was very funny, but I'd like to think I know what these people sound like-I've been watching the stuff since I was a kid, and I thought that maybe people would respond to dialogue that sounded familiar.

But yeah-I'm no fan o' #9.

Thanks again.
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post #30 of 72
12/24/00 at 5:36am
Thread Starter 
Okay...who among us is "The Stunner?"

Pretty funny...
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post #31 of 72
12/24/00 at 9:04am
Alright! Come you geeks post specific instuction for getting rid of the cookies. I find the @pollwizard and the explorer body_christmass and delete them, but sometimes it still won't let me vote
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post #32 of 72
12/24/00 at 2:55pm
Alright you are in the lead you magnificent bastard. The creetch and I got you up to 255, he is still at a miserable 213. Today is the day. You will have it.

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EAT THIS
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post #33 of 72
12/24/00 at 3:14pm
Yep yep yep. Johnny and I have been busy little elves today. Im still voting, but it looks like #9 has caught on now though, so Im hoping he just gives up soon.

Shelby, Roddy Piper kicks ASS, I've been watching him since I was a wee lil girl, I member seeing him at the Boston Garden as the proverbial bad guy wrassler, and he got pants'ed by Superfly Snuka or someone, quite amusing. Sigh, memories.......
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post #34 of 72
12/24/00 at 3:18pm
Thread Starter 
Michele'...Jo-er...uh, Johnny (whew!)-I will never forget this, my friends.

My friends.

You know, back before I ever hit the on-ramp to the info superhighway, I thought it was ridiculous that there were people I knew that talked about people they comunicated with on the web like they were flesh and blood FRIENDS.

I used to tell them, "Look. Look at us. Gathered here. WE are FRIENDS. A group of people, face to face, who've known each other for years-that's FRIENDS. Not some person you TYPE to."

I guess I didn't fully understand.

And even then, I'd wager that the people my friends were "wasting time" with were nowhere NEAR the caliber of humans that are here.

I am in your debt. And trust me when I tell you that I repay them.

This is really very weird.

GDog-I know that guy doesn't like me. Angel-we've had little tiffs...

Quite a few people here aren't fans of me-hell, some of them are new to the boards-they've nothing invested in this.

I don't know if it's the bullshite spirit of Christmas or the genuine decency of people, or the willingness to help a guy out, or sheer boredom-but I'm literally going to have one of the best holidays I've ever had because of what you guys have done here.

And that's REGARDLESS of whether or not Roddy Piper rings my phone today.

Thank you very much.

Jason Pollock
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post #35 of 72
12/24/00 at 3:45pm
Just hit it again from my Mom's house -- looks like you're comfortably in the lead. I'll give ya $100 if you can get him to come to your house for tea and then put him in the Camel Clutch™. Booyah!
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post #36 of 72
12/24/00 at 10:20pm
well -- did you win???
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post #37 of 72
12/24/00 at 10:21pm
Thread Starter 
Uh...guys?

I won.

Seriously.

Thank you.
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post #38 of 72
12/24/00 at 10:28pm
You da man, Jason.

YOU DA MAN...
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post #39 of 72
12/24/00 at 10:38pm
There's a helluva present. You go, boy! BOO-YAH!
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post #40 of 72
12/24/00 at 10:41pm
Thread Starter 
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!

(jumping about and acting like a goon)
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post #41 of 72
12/24/00 at 10:57pm
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !
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post #42 of 72
12/24/00 at 10:59pm
I knew you'd win! You just had to!

>twinkle of joyous tears in her eyes<

make it count dear Jason, make it count.

>cough< ANYway. Im very happy you won, cuz that #9 schmuck was beginning to anger me greatly, have a happy holiday, and don't forget to tape record it, you

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post #43 of 72
12/24/00 at 11:02pm
Thread Starter 
I'm not going to record it.
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post #44 of 72
12/24/00 at 11:03pm
Thread Starter 
Roddy's reps told me that HE will.

It's going up on the site...

This is going to be horrible...
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post #45 of 72
12/24/00 at 11:25pm
HAM, I never have, probably never will "not like" you. I don't know how you got that idea. Maybe it was because I didn't think your entry was funny (but I voted for you a bunch of times!).

HAM, here's an FYI: If I'm being completely honest with you, it means I like you.

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post #46 of 72
12/24/00 at 11:27pm
and congrats on getting to talk to his Roddyness.
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post #47 of 72
12/24/00 at 11:46pm
Thread Starter 
A long time ago, we got nto an argument, and I was under the impression you were not a fan of mine.

Thank you for the clarification.

Thank you for your help. I'm glad I was wrong.

Merry X-mas.
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post #48 of 72
12/25/00 at 12:06am
camel clutch -- CAM-EL-CLUTCH!

Congrats, man
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post #49 of 72
12/25/00 at 12:24am
Thread Starter 
No harm will come to the Rowdy One.

Well-most people think that talking to me for five seconds harms-so maybe I'm wrong...
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post #50 of 72
12/25/00 at 1:48am
Thread Starter 
I just got off the phone.

Michelle-I made it count.

All of you-you don't understand what you've done. You have no idea. Something really incredible happened tonight.

I don't think I can say much else.

But you guys helped to make this happen, and I swear-to whatever higher power exists-that I will never forget it.

Roddy and I-we talked. Roddy and I are going to talk again.

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