Stupidest scenes in a movie

I LOVE #1 and #5.

Stupidest scenes?

1) 2 Fast 2 Furious - "Yo, Bryan I just ejected the bad dude out of my car!"
2) The Phantom Menace - Pod Race Scene
3) The American President - "My girlfriend is not a slut, and no one should own a gun!" (I agreed with him, but the sermon was out of the blue)
4) 2 Fast 2 Furious - "I can't go farther than 200 yards from my house but my house is on wheels."
5) Get Carter - The Shaving Scene

Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum plugging their lil' Apple laptop into the Alien Mothership and uploading a virus that makes a big laughing skull appear on all the computer monitors, then FUCKING BLOWS UP THE ENTIRE SHIP, probably remains the single stupidest scene ever shat onto celluloid, closely followed by the ending of Jaws: The Revenge.

(Some Spoilers to follow)

- The stupid argument between Will Smith, Martin Lawrence, and Tia Leone in the middle of BAD BOYS 1. What the hell was that about?
- All of Big Momma's House. How the hell did this turd get green lighted?
- Any Matrix spoofing in any movie (ESPECIALLY Shrek and Scary Movie!)
- In Scream, where the two guys stab each other. What the fuck?
- The dream sequences in From Hell of the murders that don't even stop them from happening. Completely pointless scenes that should have been pulled. That, and that hideously deformed man on display. Why the fuck is he in there?!
- Jack Burton refuses to say goodbye to the woman he made out with at the end of Big Trouble in Little China. What the fuck was that about? Plus that, and the "twist" ending. Should have been cut to just Burton's speech on the CB and then THE END.
- The Fast and the Furious 1 was full of stupid ass scenes. It got worse when people actually spoke some lines. "Smoke em'."
- xXx: Xander takes a food tray and rides a staircase rail down with it. Utter crap.
- Scooby-Doo: Scrappy "marks" his territory.
- X-men 1: All of Rogue's "big stary eyes" scenes. Made me want to put an axe through the screen.

Those scenes make the movie.

Okay, the no-goodbye scene I can live with, knowing at least one chewer on these boards likes it, but the ass-ugly monster popping out of the back of Jack's truck, as the "twist" ending hinted at a sequel, which never came.

Heh heh. Big Trouble in Little China 2: Jack Reloaded.

The 'Superman' scene at the end of The Matrix.

I think you could have hit the nail on the head there. Those are probably the two worst scenes I can recall. Jaws the Revenge was pretty bad but the fact that the ID4 scene stands out in a film chock full of crap moments probably seals it for me.

The gidget-esque windsurfing scene in Die Another Day is tops for me.

And the scene in Ep 2 that looks like the concession stand ad for Carmike Cinemas.

Blair Witch Project- The guy reveals he chucked the map into the lake. WTF?
Forrest Gump runs across America and right out of the movie.

I heartily disagree with Jaws: The Revenge. That movie was such a ridiculous mess, it had to end that way. That ending made Revenge the worst sequel of all time. Classic.

Its strange but Jaws IV does approach "so bad its good" territory whereas ID4 is stuck in the nomansland of shit but not shit enough. Perhaps in 20 years geeks will be worshipping it with the same fervour as Mothra.

The greater mystery is how the hell Michael Caine recovered to Oscar glory from this low ebb. Has anyone fallen so far and yet got back in the saddle so effectively?

I have to take a cue from Bateman and say that that scene made the whole movie work. Hell, I didn't even know the scene was an homage to Superman at all. I was just blown away with Neo's speech to the Matrix at the end, and what happens after he stepped out of the phone booth. Knowing that that scene is an homage to Superman actually makes it greater, not stupid.

There's probably more I can think of but this one comes to mind immediately.

GHOSTS OF MARS - The crew speeds away on on a train from the haunted town when Natasha Henstridge decides that they should GO BACK to get rid'em once and for all. Then most of them end up dead and ultimately fail from stopping the ghosts from reaching, I don't know, Mars City or whatever the main civilized area was called.

I'm not bothered about the homage to Superman, in fact the flying scenes were one of the few things I enjoyed in Reloaded. The fact is, for me, it just looks incredibly silly, especially the way it's done. The scene at the end was a good scene, and if he'd just have put the phone down and walked off to the sound of RATM and disappeared into the crowd, it would have been perfect. I also think it would have also upped the 'woah' factor on the flying scenes in the sequel if we hadn't seen it before.

You could argue to the opposite though, which is that if is newfound ability to fly hadn't been setup in the end of the first film, most people would have been going "he's flying now? what the wtf?" soon as he'd have started to fly in Reloaded.

Anyway, my favorite "I can't believe they dared to put that that in the movie" scene is the ending for Lethal Weapon 4. Trying to sell us the concept that Gibson and Glover, both in their 50s and almost unable to punch properly could beat a martial arts master like Jet Li, who's been shown five minutes earlier dodging a bullet at near-superhuman speed is irreparably fucked in the head.

OK, I love The Running Man, but ill admit the following scene is horribly stupid, but it makes me laugh:
The resistance hacks into the cable signal and broadcasts it on tv. Cut to Killian:
"Who loves you, and who do you love?"

Audience: "DAMON!!!!"

(Killian flailing his arms, repeated 3 times) "YES! YES! YES!"

Then to top it off, in a really crappy font the words appear on the screen. "KILLIAN IS LYING TO YOU." That makes me laugh.

I think the greatest mystery is how Michael Caine his plane into the water, and his shirt wasn't even WET when he crawled up on the boat.

Also, the "non-killing" of the Peebles (depending on which version you saw) was utter pap. How PC is too much PC?

And falling off said conveyor belt, and landing face up under a pulverizer.

**The black dude flying back to the ship after the one he is on explodes in Event Horizon.

**Fast and Furious- Paul Walker just lets VinDeisel go...sorry, sell that somewhere else.

**Get Carter. Yes, just -Get Carter.

Stupidest scene of all time:

The gymnastic flipping shit the little girl in JP2: The Lost World does to kick a raptor.

Stupidest scene ever.

The 'Stick wins.

Leland Orser convincing the crew of the Betty that he should be okay to go with them DESPITE HAVING A CHESTBURSTER INSIDE HIM in Alien Resurrection.

'I need a vacation' and subsequent thumbs-up.

Stupid scenes? Uh, you'd best be inquirin' below, boyo...

I hated that so much. By the end of the movie, I started cheering Jet Li to beat the crap out of them (I just imagined I was watching Fist of Legend and that those two were 'evil' japanese) and despite them cheating (double teaming him and using a forklift) our hero prevailed, before he got shot by the cowardly Riggs bring tears to moviegoers everywhere...

Anyway, dumbest scenes I saw were in:

-For The Love Of The Game (the "clear the mechanism" scenes and Kelly Preston's hysterics at the hospital).

-Finding Forrester ("You're the man now, dog!")

-Armaggedon (animal crackers)

-X-Men (Storm's dialogue and role altogether. Halle's constant blinking before they left for the Statue of Liberty was annoying).

As for X2, well, she was better but still an annoyance in that she seemed to show up in any scene that doesn't directly involve her. as a female friend of mine commented during Logan's return to the mansion, Halle entered into the frame breasts first and my friend said: "Geez!she might as well waltz in with the words: 'Hi, I'm Academy Award winner Halle Berry, you may not remember me from such movies as The Last Boy Scout and The Flintstones but not anymore. I'm a respected actress and household name thanks to these....'" and we both started snickering).

elizabeth berkeley's temper tantrum in SHOWGIRLS...
all of the mushy scenes in SPIDERMAN...
all of the mushy scenes in AOTC...
matt leblanc in LOST IN SPACE...
keanu in MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING...
phillip seymour hoffman in anything after HAPPINESS...
all of the one liners: "you complete me" - "i'm just a boy, standing in front of a girl" - "no, i'll love you for the rest of mine" - etc. etc...
sophia coppola in GODFATHER III...
padme falling in the sand and popping right up again in AOTC...
padme running in the sand in AOTC...
steven segal running in any movie...

*appluads* lol Well done New well done.

You could fill this entire thread with Resident Evil alone, my faves are the wall kick that kills the zombie dog, the fact that the hall with a sense of humor deemed it necessary to toy with the soldiers with the first two lasers before unleashing an inescapable grid, and that a team of obviously slightly trained commandos wastes all but seemingly 14 bullets on the first few zombies before anyone even thinks about trying to shoot them in the head.

Honorable mention:
-Any time Martin Lawrence decides to begin dancing for no reason whatsoever.
-Any scene where a resourceful hero dispatches one of the villain's armed henchmen with his barehands or something clever, and then just leaves the bad guy's gun right there on the ground. I'm looking in your direction, Arnold.
-Batman & Robin, every single last day-glo bit of it.
-The car-under-tractor trailer scene from F&F.
-Scream. The entire concept. I don't see myself as a "tough guy", but anyone should have the sense to hang up on the guy, dial 911, arm yourself, and stay put...but that's just me. I think the worst thing about that one is that the movie was built up as skewering slasher flick cliches, and still fell victim to the very same ones.
-Warren Beaty in Bulworth.

Back to Jurassic Park 2 for a second--isn't that the one where the heroes are stuck in a big van/laboratory that soon gets pushed over a cliff by a couple of dinosaurs? And when somebody comes along to rescue them, mere seconds after certain death has been narrowly avoided, and as they and the truck they're in still dangle precariously hundreds of feet over jagged rocks, they start wisecracking and throwing stupid jokey remarks around as if they were shooting the shit on the set during a lunch break. Pure Spielbergian cheez at its most rancid.

Jurassic Park 3 had plenty of stupid moments of its own. The giant pterodactyl carrying one of the brats off and then soaring away to drop him somewhere near its nest, where he gently touches ground, unbruised, unpanicked, unmussed. Plus the once-reliable WILLIAM H MACY's character's miraculous return at the end, unmussed, unpanicked, etc, after apparently being crushed and immolated under an exploding, burning motorboat. And so on, and so on.

The virus didn't blow up the ship, it was the large missile they fired into it before they undocked.

True, but I found it odd that although the alien technology was far more advance, they decided to stick with Mac OS on their computers.

Well, I can get e-mail from Mac computers on my PC, doesn't mean I'm running Mac OS.

And really, if you're still looking for demanding scientific accuracy by that point, you've missed the entire point of the film.

Wasn't the mothership larger than North Dakota? What kind of missles were they using, exactly? And shouldn't that puppy have been pulled out a little earlier in the war for survival?

As for Jurassic Park II, I don't remember any wise-cracking when they were hanging off the side of the cliff in the trailer. I actually thought Spielberg played that sequence surprisingly tense.

Jurassic Park III, however, deserves hatred for the stupid, stupid cellphone inside the spinosaur's stomach. Listen, I can't hear my cell phone ring if it's sitting in the next ROOM. You're telling me they can hear this ringtone through 17 tons of dinoflesh, and all the way across a fucking field? Nope. Not buying it.

JP3's stupidest scene is the capper for the franchise, though. The heroes are surrounded by raptors, which they chase away using a plastic whistle. They walk down to the beach and holy shit, the millitary is here! Roll credits. No rising suspense, no climax, no explainations, no resolution...just credits. Fuck you, Johnson. Stay the hell away from my Jurassic Park movies. Hack.

This one was let off inside the mother ship. Able to do more damage that way.

Come on, didn't you see Armageddon? wink

Or Star Wars?

I actually don't have that much trouble with the ship blowing up, to be perfectly honest...I actually missed it the first time in the theater, because my friends and I were laughing too hard over the fact that interstellar barbarians were Mac-compatible.

Oh I wasn't looking for scientific accuracy at that point. I gave up on that when the president and co. enter the "clean room" and in walks the head of operations Brent Spiner looking like he just crawled out of a dumpster.

Well, I don't remember specifics too well, but one of them--Julianne Moore, I think--makes a crack like, "Hey, pick me up a Big Mac while you're up there!" to the guy who's come to rescue them. It's one of those "so stupid" movie moments that are impossible to forget. Those people were wayyy too chirpy for people in their situation.

<strong> Yeah, I think I remember that one. Really, though, JP3 was so full of groan-worthy moments that it's impossible to keep track of them all. Just Macy appearing in the thing was depressing enough.

I think the fact that Billy ends up surviving in Jurassic Park III is the stupidest scene in the movie.

You can add the end of Halloween: H20 to this list.

LL Cool J surviving the gunshot, on his fucking cell phone with his wife.
"Nah, baby, the bullet just grazed mah head. And this gives me an idea for a book..."

As much as I liked JP3 (it was goofy fun, better than the overloaded JP2), the stupidest scene occurs in the beginning. It's not even the scene, so much as what it implies. A man and his son go parasailing undetected around the island.
Wouldn't the international waters around this island be the single most densely populated spot on Earth? There's an island with an entire eco-system of dinosaurs out there, and NOBODY'S there. No UN military ships stationed to keep people out. No satilitte surveillance. No mass of commercial opportunists attempting to offer glimpses of the island for tourists. No planes or helicopters conducting constant fly-bys. It's deserted.
Stoopid.

What actually was the point of the film?

In JP2, the line was:

Jeff: "3 double cheeseburgers with everything on it!"
Vince: "Hold the pickles on mine!"
Moore: "And an apple turnover!"

For shame Steven..I could've, maybe, delt with the cheeseburger crack, but the other two..ugh..I agree that it was a very tense, and well done scene, but it loses a few cool points just for those remarks. The fat guy getting ripped in half redeemed it alittle.

And I'm sorry, but whoever thought it was a good idea to make Ahnuld say "Talk to the hand" needs to be shot.

Um, they were trying to do damage to each other so it looked like they had been attacked by the killer. Sneaky.

You mean the Elephant Man?

Uh, that's Joseph "John" Merrick, aka "The Elephant Man". He's a real historical person who lived in Whitechapel during the same time as the Jack The Ripper murders. He was also featured in the Alan Moore graphic novel from which the film was based (though the scene was entirely different).

His appearance in the film (as well as the book) is used as a reference point that illustrates the depravity of London's Whitechapel during the Victorian era as well as the dichotomy between the upper and under classes. If you ask me, it's one of the only scenes in that film that really works.

All of Any Given Sunday but extra curses for the I got hit so hard my eyeball popped out scene.

The movie is nice, dumb fun, but the scene in "Starship Troopers" where Casper outruns a nuclear explosion is pushing its luck.

Ah, now I see. Thanks a bunch.

I can't believe nobody has mentioned this one. In Predator when the Predator kills itself and causes a nuclear explosion that Arnie survives. I mean what's that all about? That's just bloody silly. Completely ruins everything that's gone before it.

Speaking of surviving Nuclear Explosions in an Arnie flick, near the end of True Lies, when Harry rescues his large breasted wife, they kiss while a nuke nearby goes off. Shouldn't they be vaporized a la Sarah Connor from her dream in T2?