Yes! Beer is the greatest. Well maybe the second greatest. Let's examine this shall we?
Beer v. Pussy
A beer is always wet.
A pussy needs encouragement.
Advantage: Beer.
A beer tastes horrible served hot.
A pussy tastes better served hot.
Advantage: Pussy.
Having an ice cold beer makes you satisfied.
Having an ice cold pussy makes you Hillary Clinton.
Advantage: Beer.
Beers have commercials making fun of skunky ones.
Pussy does not.
Advantage: Draw.
If you get a hair in your teeth consuming
pussy, you are not disgusted.
Advantage: Pussy
24 beers come in a box.
A pussy is a box you can come in.
Advantage: Pussy.
Too much head makes you mad at the person
giving you a beer.
Advantage: Pussy.
If a beer is brewed with yeast, it is
still edible.
Advantage: Beer.
If you come home smelling like beer, The
Woman may get mad.
If you come home smelling like pussy, she
will definitely get mad.
Advantage: Beer.
6 beers in a night and you better not
drive.
6 pussies in a night and you have done
all the driving you need.
Advantage: Pussy
Buy too much beer and you will get fat.
Buy too much pussy and you will get poor.
Advantage: Draw
It is socially acceptable to have a beer
in the stands at a football game.
You are a legend if you have a pussy in
the stands at a football game.
Advantage: Pussy
If a cop smells beer on your breath, you
are going to get a breathalyzer.
If a cop smells pussy on your breath, you
are going to get a high five.
Advantage: Pussy
With beer, bigger is better.
Advantage: beer.
Wearing a condom does not make a beer any less enjoyable.
Advantage: beer.
Pussy can make you see God.
Beer can make you see the porcelain God.
Advantage: Pussy
If you think all day about the next pussy you will have,
you are normal.
If you think all day about your next beer, you are an alcoholic.
Advantage: Pussy
Peeling labels off of beers is fun.
Peeling panties off of pussy is more fun.
Advantage: Pussy.
If you try to snag a beer at work, you get fired.
If you try to snag a pussy at work, you get hit with sexual
harassment.
Advantage: Draw
If you suddenly drop a beer, it may break.
If you suddenly drop a pussy, it may hunt
you down like the dog you are.
Advantage: Beer.
If you change to another beer, your old
brand will gladly have you back.
Advantage: beer.
The best pussy you have ever had is not
gone once you have enjoyed it.
Advantage: Pussy.
The worst pussy you have ever had is not
gone once you have enjoyed it.
Advantage: Beer.
Bad beer: Schlitz, Pabst Blue Ribbon, Old Swill.
Bad pussy: Roseanne, Janet Reno, Madeline Albright.
Advantage: Beer
Good beer: Guinness, Sam Adams, Killian's Red
Good pussy: Almost all but the above.
Advantage: Pussy.
The government taxes beer.
Advantage: Pussy.
It's a close call, but the numbers never lie.
Advantage: Pussy.
