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Old timers: Give one piece of advice to the new kids

post #1 of 77
Thread Starter 
If there was ONE thing you could impart to the new folks, what would it be?

Mine: Post totals do not the Chewer make. Don't spam the board in an attempt to get more posts.
post #2 of 77
Borrowed from Harlan Ellison:

There are certain chewers one should never fuck with. Attempts at a pissing contest should be filed away next to an adaptation The Bonfire of the Vanities starring Tom Hanks, Bruce Willis, and Melanie Griffith as a bad idea. You should be smart enough to figure out who they are.

post #3 of 77
Don't know if anyone would consider me an old-timer, but...well, i've got a lot of posts.

Just don't do stupid things. Don't fight with people for any reasons except film (unless you have a VERY good reason) and don't troll. Please, do not troll.
post #4 of 77
Picking fights is fine, it spices up the threads. Its only when the fights resort to petty name calling and physical threats that they get stupid.
post #5 of 77
Disagree and debate all you like. Don't ever mistake the opinion for the person.
post #6 of 77
Heh.

If you post something...stand by it. Don't back down, don't change you're mind unless you rethink it and then say such...don't act like you always believe this way.

And never do anything I've already done. People posting that they're leaving was only funny once and it was a long time ago.
post #7 of 77
Agreed about sticking to your post Django, one thing I hate is when someone gets their ass handed to them in a thread, then they go back and erase everything they ever wrote. It just makes you look worse.
post #8 of 77
Thick Skin.

Get several loads of it.
post #9 of 77
When all else fails, remember these four little words...

Always Agree With Django.

Don't ask me why. I don't know. It just works.
post #10 of 77
My advice? Only post when you need to. Like when someone says something so wrong that you must beat the shit out of them verbally. And before you do that, check your sources of information and think really fucking hard about your opinions. Nothing is worse than people who say "U R WRONGERS! THIS FUKKIN SUKS! YOUR A FUKKIN ASWIP!". Back up opinions with thoughtful commentary. Don't be contrary just for the sake of being contrary.

My post total is very low considering I've been here since 2000. Doesn't make me any less a part of the community. I just don't feel the need to post in every single fucking thread or start threads like "I wiped my own ass today!"
post #11 of 77
I love the purgatory between the "world of the old-timers" and the "hell of the newbies." I get away with a lot more bullshit here.
post #12 of 77
To quote Jim Rome, "Have a take, don't suck."
post #13 of 77
Not sure if I qualify as an "old timer" but...

Someone criticising your favourite movies isn't criticising you.
post #14 of 77
Five word sentences are best.
post #15 of 77
Use the "Preview Post" button.
post #16 of 77
Do your research. Starting a thread about how much you hate Episode II while ignoring the twenty-two others that line the stomach of the Franchise forum is just plain ignorant.

There's a search function for a reason.
post #17 of 77
Read the main site too, don't just come straight to the boards. There's more to CHUD - a LOT more - than just the boards. Don't let that quality work go unseen or unappreciated.
post #18 of 77
<img src="http://l3.web.cern.ch/l3/PR/curious/images/explosion.jpg" alt="" />

Use a picture to reply, no matter the topic. Explosions usually do the trick.
post #19 of 77
Listen to Dan and Devin. Then, act upon what they say here.
post #20 of 77
Please don't post long articles. Quote the most pertinent or salient ideas/statements, then attribute the article with a hyperlink*.

*Preferably if you know how to use the url= surrounding a <a href="http://chud.com/" target="_blank">WORD</a>. Otherwise if you just copy/paste the link sometimes it goes off the page. You don't want to go off the page. You wouldn't like me when it goes off the page.
post #21 of 77
Speak to Chewers as if they are sitting next to you in a bar. Be yourselves. If you are going to insult somebody, have a good reason. If you are going to debate somebody, take a firm position, gather some research if necessary, then defend your ideas to the last. Backing down to agree with people will not get you respect. Defending what you believe and making good points... that, my friends, gets you respect. Get in people's faces, but have the tact to know when to let up.

You can earn respect from Chewers by acting with class and keeping a sense of humor. And by enjoying Triscuits. If you don't enjoy Triscuits, you can kiss my grits.
post #22 of 77
Can I post a second one here? Yes? Well...I feel driven...

Please please please do not post like <a href="http://chud.com/board/ubbhtml/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=11;t=002780" target="_blank">THIS</a>. It's an obscure title with nothing but a link. No replies under it so I have to assume two things:
A) I'm the first to see this post...even if I'm not.
B) This link is not safe and won't relate at all with the thread title, thereby dropping triple X porn onto my system when I'm not trying to go there.

Please, say something about the link...please. And if it seems questionable please assure whether it's safe for work or not. As for the above link...I still don't know. I never clicked it.
post #23 of 77
It's part of the Homestar Runner site, which I linked to about six months ago.
post #24 of 77
Dont come in here thinking you are all that. Dont be really cocky. That'll only get shit thrown at you.
post #25 of 77
Quote:
Poxy Von Sinister:
It's part of the Homestar Runner site, which I linked to about six months ago.
You see? That's all the poster would have needed to say.

"It is a simple thing." -Akuta, keeper of Vol, Star Trek original.
post #26 of 77
What exactly is meant by trolling? Is that like looking for people to flame? Picking fights about insignificant stuff?
post #27 of 77
Yes.
post #28 of 77
Be childlike not childish. That is, Do be in touch with the wonder of movies or whatever else motivates you. Do not throw tantrums or smear excrement on the walls. And if you do the latter then apologize for it but as has been said DO NOT delete what you said. I posted something very out of character for me a few days ago but it still stands. That lets us see who people really are.
post #29 of 77
Please, do not post who you really are.
post #30 of 77
Be original.
post #31 of 77
As I just turned 23 this weekend, I feel old enough to say this: Always be open to others' opinions, no matter how ignorant they may sound. You don't HAVE to agree with them....
post #32 of 77
Diva is always right.
post #33 of 77
Diva is always right, except when kitty is right-er.
post #34 of 77
You couldn't be more wronger!
post #35 of 77
I lurve the Diva.
post #36 of 77
There is a lot to be said for posting as the person you are. It has been mentioned a few times above, but it needs re-emphasis.

Be who you are, you don't need a verbal "persona" to take part in anything on these boards. Say what you would say in person--'cause most of these fuckers are worth meeting face-to-face, and you don't want to have to start from scratch if you do.

Take part in whatever forums you like, admit your mistakes when you make them, don't be contrary for lack of sharing your actual personality...

And it seriously doesn't hurt to moderate your discussion with an occasional foray into a film-related topic. Especailly stuff that is springboarded by news from the front page of the site.
post #37 of 77
[teasing]Sometimes, prala can be righter.[/teasing]

I think I'd just say:

Don't be a dick, and treat people as if one day, they will all be giving you a job interview.

(Unless they are blantantly racist, sexists and/or like pregnant lady porn)
post #38 of 77
Quote:
Cheese Biscuits:
Speak to Chewers as if they are sitting next to you in a bar.
However, you should only let your fingers dance up their inner thigh if you're sure they feel the same way. If not, tequila works.
post #39 of 77
Quote:
Dan Whitehead
However, you should only let your fingers dance up their inner thigh if you're sure they feel the same way. If not, tequila works.[/QB]
Dan, I think I love you.

In that non-sexual way.
post #40 of 77
Quote:
prala:
In that non-sexual way.
Dang. (Reaches for tequila...)
post #41 of 77
I don't drink tequila. Carbomb?
post #42 of 77
I have no idea what that is, but what the hell...
post #43 of 77
I don't either, but isn't that Guinness and a shot of whiskey?
post #44 of 77
Quote:
Dan Whitehead:
I have no idea what that [Carbomb] is, but what the hell...
<img src="http://www.jrtc-polk.army.mil/opfor/Carbomb.jpg" alt="" />
And they never heard from Dan again.
post #45 of 77
It is better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt. Seriously there is no shortage in this world of people who are constantly moving their mouths and not really saying much of anything. Make every word count.
post #46 of 77
I agree with Cheese Biscuits sentiments.
post #47 of 77
Though I doubt I would be considered and old-timer, or even much a part of this community I think this holds true: It doesn't matter how many fucking posts a chewer has, read them carefully understand what is being said, respect the opinion and then respond. 1 post or 1 million posts do not reflect the intelligence of the mind behind the words and respect has become a precious commodity.
post #48 of 77
CARBOMB: Guinness with a shot of whiskey/Bailey's. Gross.
post #49 of 77
yes, it is gross.

but then, so is tequila.
post #50 of 77
Okay, this pisses me off. If somebody closes your thread, it's nothing personal. There's a good reason why it happened. Nick and company DO NOT close threads just for shits and giggles. Going and making threads like <a href="http://chud.com/board/ubbhtml/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=1;t=009334" target="_blank">this</a> does not help you. Just deal with it and move on. If you have a problem, bitches leave.
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