CHUD.com Community › Forums › THE CHEWERS › The Chewers Catch-All › Least Favorite Fanboy Cliche
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Least Favorite Fanboy Cliche

post #1 of 52
3/19/03 at 6:13am
Thread Starter 
"[blank] raped my childhood."

Seriously. That shit is old.
Reply
post #2 of 52
3/19/03 at 7:07am
You never hear "Albert Pyun raped my childhood," do you?

People...no, strike that.

GEEKS have far too many expectations over bullshit...
Reply
post #3 of 52
3/19/03 at 12:33pm
While I agree with it, I don't want to hear anymore "Greedo shoots first jokes."

And I'm tired of 'hobbits are gay' jokes.
Reply
post #4 of 52
3/19/03 at 12:44pm
I'm tired of "OMG the specs on that new Criterion made me CUM SO HARD!"
Reply
post #5 of 52
3/19/03 at 12:46pm
Quote:
Boomstick:
While I agree with it, I don't want to hear anymore "Greedo shoots first jokes."
Agreed. That and the ET/walkie-talkie jokes are getting really fucking old.
Reply
post #6 of 52
3/20/03 at 2:54am
"Jebus."

People use this word like it's the Mrs. Dash of the humor world. It isn't. I know this isn't a fanboy-only thing, but it sure seems pretty fucking prevalent in that particular circle of Hell.
Reply
post #7 of 52
3/21/03 at 2:20am
Why don't more people demand blood from Ally Pyun?

Mine is, "_______ has a beer and cheets on his wife."

The article in which it appears is one of the worst pieces of fanboy rantings I have ever seen. Funny as hell, but hard on the eyes. From grammar, spelling, syntax, you name it. Knowles did not write it, some moron submitted it and it became and still is a running gag on the site.

The jokes have served their purpose and need to be stopped. NOW!

Reply
post #8 of 52
3/21/03 at 2:25am
"Greedo shoots first jokes."

What the fuck does that mean,anyway?!
I know it's a Star Wars ref. But shit I hear that stupid line all the time. What are geeks refering too.
Reply
post #9 of 52
3/21/03 at 2:27am
I don't know if its exactly a cliche, but I'm fucking sick of fanboys being stereotyped as fat, overweight slobs.
Reply
post #10 of 52
3/21/03 at 2:35am
Quote:
Gruber: The Night Stalker:
I don't know if its exactly a cliche, but I'm fucking sick of fanboys being stereotyped as fat, overweight slobs.
Those are only the bad ones.
Reply
post #11 of 52
3/21/03 at 8:19am
Quote:
The Copy Guy:
"Greedo shoots first jokes."

What the fuck does that mean,anyway?!
I know it's a Star Wars ref. But shit I hear that stupid line all the time. What are geeks refering too.
You kidding right? You honestly have no idea?
Reply
post #12 of 52
3/21/03 at 10:26pm
Don't forget Star Wars Vs. Star Trek, and its offspring, Star Wars vs. LOTR.

-"Fuck ______, fuck them in their stupid asses"
- any sort of "leet" speak, or is it "1337 $#3@|<"? I don't know and I don't care, and for all of you out there that do it: @#':":.[=>+967&*$0--09 9082385&#$^%0-896*&5986:"][./}{>. Put that in your pipe and suck it dry.
Reply
post #13 of 52
3/21/03 at 10:33pm
Seriously. That shit is old.

That expression in italics is quite grating to me, but unfortuneately it is not limited to the fanboy world.

Best. Thing. Ever.

That. Whole. Trend. Of. Typing. How. The. Comic. Book. Guy. From. The. Simpsons. Speaks. Is. Starting. To. Lose. Its. Luster.
Reply
post #14 of 52
3/21/03 at 10:35pm
Quote:
Little Boy Momotaro:
Quote:
The Copy Guy:
"Greedo shoots first jokes."

What the fuck does that mean,anyway?!
I know it's a Star Wars ref. But shit I hear that stupid line all the time. What are geeks refering too.
You kidding right? You honestly have no idea?
I believe it. My brother likes Star Wars (he had to, growing up with me), has seen the movies a bunch of times, and religiously played the RPG. I showed him Dan Whitehead's "Greedo Wedding" poster, and the "shoots first" tagline flew way over his head.

I guess some people just forgot about it after the SE left theaters.....shit, maybe everyone should've.
Reply
post #15 of 52
3/21/03 at 11:18pm
The entire “rape” line of quips is pretty worthless. Unless you were penetrated without your written or express consent, then you weren’t raped.

I would say most of these, more often than not, are just used out of laziness and lack of creativity. Gross hyperbole is easier than analytical discourse, and it tends to draw more attention.

However, I do think just about all of these examples can work in context. The problem is that instead of being used as punch lines to well crafted commentaries, they’re the whole of the person’s argument. They become a minor step up from, “That sucked.”

But who am I to say? I ALWAYS think “Jebus” is funny! Anything that reminds me of the Simpsons is gold in my book.
Reply
post #16 of 52
3/21/03 at 11:34pm
Quoting movies excessively in real life makes me want to punch balls. Specifically (and in this order):

1) Star Wars
2) Kevin Smith
3) Quentin Tarantino

I'm guilty of this (sometimes) as well, but for serious, it's played out.
Reply
post #17 of 52
3/22/03 at 9:49pm
I find your lack of faith disturbing. Don't make me go medieval on your ass. Noonch.

Still, your point is undeniable, and "Fuck (plural blank). Fuck them up their stupid asses." has become particularly overused. Surely we can come up with more flavorful ways to tell people to self-fornicate?
Reply
post #18 of 52
3/22/03 at 9:57pm
I completely realize that a lot of people genuinely loved the prequels. I have no beef with them. Although, I am sick of people who defend the films to the death just to convince themselves that they did not get all their hopes and dreams for the films bashed on the rocks. It's okay to admit that Lucas just made some mediocre films.
Reply
post #19 of 52
3/23/03 at 1:38am
Quote:
'Beat' Andre Dellamorte:
Quoting movies excessively in real life makes me want to punch balls. Specifically (and in this order):

1) Star Wars
2) Kevin Smith
3) Quentin Tarantino

I'm guilty of this (sometimes) as well, but for serious, it's played out.
What about Monty Python? Billy Madison? Happy Gilmore? The Matrix?

I can't tell you how many times I've walked down the hallways of my highschool only to hear:

"NI! NI! HE CALLED THE SHIT POOP! YOU'RE GONNA DIE CLOWN! DODGE THIS!"

And this is all in one sentance.
Reply
post #20 of 52
3/25/03 at 8:35pm
Quote:
Mike 'Beating Off' Arsenault:
Best. Thing. Ever.

That. Whole. Trend. Of. Typing. How. The. Comic. Book. Guy. From. The. Simpsons. Speaks. Is. Starting. To. Lose. Its. Luster.
That never gets old.
Reply
post #21 of 52
3/25/03 at 8:38pm
Knoxville, that stuff is bad too as Monty Python almost made the cut, but in terms of pure movie fanboys, those would be my three least favorite. It reminds of what a friend said about people who like Jim Jarmusch, as she said that the people who worship JJ rarely have their own taste. One could argue the same for at least 2/3 of mine.
Reply
post #22 of 52
3/25/03 at 9:40pm
Quote:
Striding Cloud Django:
You never hear "Albert Pyun raped my childhood," do you?
No but I have heard Albert Fish raped my childhood.
Reply
post #23 of 52
3/25/03 at 9:47pm
There is a tasteless Roman Polanski joke that's just waiting to be made here.
Reply
post #24 of 52
3/26/03 at 3:02pm
ILM never wins for best visual effects because the academy hate George Lucas. "Star Wars fanboys"
Reply
post #25 of 52
3/26/03 at 3:06pm
Quote:
Gandalf´s Father:
ILM never wins for best visual effects because the academy hate George Lucas. "Star Wars fanboys"
Besides, ILM pretty much owned the award all through the 80s.
Reply
post #26 of 52
3/26/03 at 3:07pm
Most annoying geek cliche:

I think Harry Knowles has the writing ability of a third-grader and questionable credibility for a lot of his reviews, but the "Harry is fat" posts on that other site make me feel ashamed to be an internet geek.
Reply
post #27 of 52
3/27/03 at 7:32am
Knoxville, I'm sure I've said something funnier you could quote...I say 'I'm sure', I'm just hoping really.

My favourite cliche ? When someone says in all honesty and lack of experience:

"Trust me, I really doubt [___insert director's name here___] has what it takes to pull this off"

Arrogance coupled with brazen bollock-brainedness maketh a fuckery, in mine eyes.
Reply
post #28 of 52
3/27/03 at 12:34pm
"[ insert director's name here] should direct.
Reply
post #29 of 52
3/27/03 at 1:43pm
"and Bruce Campbell should play {insert any character here}"
Reply
post #30 of 52
3/28/03 at 6:21am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
hesterthe13th:
"and Bruce Campbell should play {insert any character here}"
A-fucking-men.
Reply
post #31 of 52
3/28/03 at 11:45am
I despise the term Joe Six-Pack to refer to the average consumer. It smacks of elitism.
Reply
post #32 of 52
3/28/03 at 12:39pm
Agreed. The average consumer buys twelve-packs these days.
Reply
post #33 of 52
3/28/03 at 1:49pm
"X has not released X title on DVD. Therefore, X must be a greedy asshole."
Reply
post #34 of 52
3/28/03 at 1:52pm
Sweeping, oversimplified generalizations are annoying. People who use generalizations are stupid.
Reply
post #35 of 52
3/28/03 at 2:06pm
That was ironical.
Reply
post #36 of 52
3/28/03 at 2:11pm
I was going for satirical, but I'll take what I can get.

More hatred: CHUD is the only message board I've ever seen that's not packed with posters crowing about being "first," as if making the first post in a blank forum is somehow the equivalent of curing a life-threatening disease. I hate first posters.

I also hate people who hate first posters.
Reply
post #37 of 52
4/9/03 at 5:28pm
1. "Star Wars isn't science fiction."
2. "Lord of the Rings is not a trilogy."
3. "It's 'Spider-Man,' not 'Spiderman.'"

All true, I suppose, but it annoys the hell out of when in the midst of an argument over one of these franchises, I'm making some legitimate, logical point and someone comes back at me with this nitpick shit. (also, I seem to remember some argument on the boards where someone said SW isn't scifi, then went on to list Aliens as one of their fav scifi films).
Reply
post #38 of 52
4/9/03 at 7:32pm
RealUltimatePower... I may love it still... but it's so freakin' old.

However, I still love the Something Awful created "It's a trap!" cliche.
Reply
post #39 of 52
4/10/03 at 1:39pm
"Natch" or "Nootch" or "Noitch"...

In what context does this word come into play anyway?? Damn stupid if you ask me.
Reply
post #40 of 52
4/10/03 at 1:43pm
Fanboys in general make me queasy.
Reply
post #41 of 52
4/10/03 at 1:45pm
Believe it or not, they annoy the living hell out of me too. At least the "radical" ones. I can't visit the hardcore fansites (TheForce.Net, et al) without feeling sick to my stomach and shaking my head at the sadness of it all. It really does sap my own personal enjoyment out of things sometimes.
Reply
post #42 of 52
4/10/03 at 1:56pm
Understandable Carl, it's because they're fetishizing it.
Reply
post #43 of 52
4/10/03 at 2:02pm
Fetishizing, trivializing, over-analyzing, desensitizing, degrading, you name it...
Reply
post #44 of 52
4/10/03 at 2:19pm
Wouldn't most people posting on a movie message board about stuff like Star Wars and Buffy be considered fanboys though?
Reply
post #45 of 52
4/10/03 at 2:35pm
That its not fanPEOPLE
Reply
post #46 of 52
4/10/03 at 2:37pm
Maybe you shouldn't be insulted. I mean, look at fanboys. Weird.
Reply
post #47 of 52
4/10/03 at 2:42pm
If this makes any sense, there's a difference between what a normal person would call a fanboy, and what a fan would call a fanboy. A big difference. Where a normal person might consider a grown man having a framed poster of Return of the Jedi fanboyish, said fanboy might find a grown man who has an autographed picture of Sy Snoodles the real fanboy. Or someone who actually talks about how he designed his own Jango Fett costume. Or someone who talks about the effects of carbon scoring. Or someone who writes He Man porn...
Reply
post #48 of 52
4/10/03 at 2:44pm
I revel in my fanboyness.

Or girlness

or...something.
Reply
post #49 of 52
4/10/03 at 2:48pm
Dellamorte pretty much nailed it, though it goes a little deeper than that.
Reply
post #50 of 52
4/10/03 at 2:50pm
filmgeek vs. fanboy is the same false dichotomy as punk vs. poseur. Basically, a rabid, irrational fan whose company (or posts) I enjoy is a geek. A rabid, irrational fan who annoys me is a fanboy.
Reply
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: The Chewers Catch-All
CHUD.com Community › Forums › THE CHEWERS › The Chewers Catch-All › Least Favorite Fanboy Cliche