Dan Will Give You His Honest Opinion - Page 2

You don't like my musical tastes, but does that mean you don't like me?

yeah, sure...

Hit. Me.

I'm a glutton for punishment.
Feed me.

I will drink from the fountain of Dan, and live forever.

And what does he do?

You skipped me...

I guess that says it all. frown

Dan, I'd like your honest opinion...of Burke.

I'm gonna regret this, aren't I?

What is your opinion of me?!

The nemesis thread pretty much explained your opinion of me, but have at it anyway.

*Edited because I can't spelle.

Who really gives a shit about Lawhorn's opinion anyway?

Wanting to know his opinion and caring about it are two different things.

Though I'm fairly certain of your feelings towards me....What the hell, sometimes a kick in the crotch can be....an intensely spiritual experience....My legs are spread wide and my eyes are closed....Kick away......

Dan, do you hate me?

Do me

He ducked me as his nemesis, let's see if he has the stones to bring it now.

Oh, what the hell.

I spit on your opinion of me, whatever it is.

And I saw you in that TV commercial too - the one where the kid cuts in line at the theme park (?) and pays with an empty soda can - you're the kid he cuts in front of. I saw you faghorn!

And he hasn't responded to this thread.

So, BOOBIES and 'Da Sexy to that, you punk.

What? That's it? Thats all I get after all the hard work I put into insulting you so often? Man, you are the worst nemesis ever. Weiner.

I have read your opinion...and frankly I think you suck.

Time for ego deflation. Both barrels, please.

I need hatred.

I'm curious. Gimmie the gut shot, solar plexus please.

Do me.

He has abandoned us.

You still doing this? If you are please tell me why you don't like me. You've said a couple of times that you don't, but never why.

Watch the little fucker ignore me again.

After having gone through a lot of family trauma lately with the DNA tests and all, Dan said he was too "emotional" to finish this. So as his nemesis/doppleganger I have been assigned this duty. Please don't treat me like Colin Quinn taking over for the recently fired Norma McDonald. Also don't feel bad. None of this is real. If this is your "real life" then your problems are beyond Dan criticizing you.

Fett: Your name is Star Wars related which makes you a big dork. Then again, we're all on the internet, which also makes us dorks. That said, you're generally a sensible young chap.

Kid Ego: You've failed to make an impression on Dan, which means your name, nay, your entire existance is a total lie.

Sleepless Slumber: Dan asked if you're a Creature Corner kid? Cause he doesn't know very well.

Strax: You have awful taste in movie music. Otherwise, Dan wants your job.

kittyinjammies: Admittedly, the boobie flash thing is getting o-l-d, but you're a very nice person on the boards, and kind and caring. Which makes Dan think of you as motherly. Which kind of freaks him out with the whole boobie flashing thing.

Gio: Dan knows he knows you, but doesn't remember the how or the why.

capteucalyptus : Dan has never liked your name. Otherwise, you pass the physical.

Walter konkrete: Spell check is your friend. Otherwise, you seem enthusiastic, though the spelling thing gets in the way of your posts.

Hellion: Why is it the kids with the tough names aren't the bastards you'd think they'd be?

Flyers: Total butt slut. Laugharn likes you, he'd totally eat some Eggo's with you.

Verbal: You've grown a lot as a poster, but you're also rash and still have a ways to grow. You've outshined your beginings here, though, so bully for that. Still Laugharn wants you to take it up a notch.

Shelby: You've been on again off again lately, which is too bad. Dan is totally uncomfortable with his sexuality, but he loves your n00dz. Wishes you had more time for this nonsense.

Dave Brosius: an old timer. An old timer who spends a lot of time in the RPG forum. DL thinks that's cool, in a way.

Matt Goldberg: Laugharn feels shame and sadness that you actually watched Kangaroo Jack. He knows you got to keep the disc and all, and maybe you traded it out (+ others) for a video game or something, but, you know, life is short.

Beer Die: How long have you been here? Do you really think you've made a name and niche for yourself that people can judge you? Dan doesn't. Smaller sig, please.

DaveB: You flaked on the record draft, and for that, Dan's temper tantrums rage.

-New-Order-: You have under 400 posts and you wonder what Dan thinks of you? You haven't made an ass of yourself yet. Keep it up.

Ludwig: Dan likes you, but you came back after making a big stink so you totally lose points. It's like breaking up with a girlfriend, complaining about how bad the relationship was and how often she cheated on you, and then a couple months later marrying her. Dan has always been enamored of that picture with you and the stripper though.

Bob Clark: You certainly act like a AICN refugee. As such you haven't totally embraced the Chud sensibilty. You'll probably find it though.

A-Pathetic: It's nice that you don't this stuff too seriously. Obviously you're not a Chud addict, but know how to type and respond. Good deal.

Khitcher: Kinki kids joke. Laugharn once told me he thinks the world of you, but he had been eating a lot fo pixie sticks, so I think it was the sugar talking. Who doesn't like Khitch, though, seriously?

Burke: ____________

Russell Lucas: An old timer who's had a lot of different accounts. a kindred spirit for Don Whiskerando.

Z-Man: Though Laugharn hasn't seen enough Russ Meyer (something that could be said for everyone), he does love Beyond the Valley of the Dolls. You get points.

DJ Dylan: Dan will always be annoyed you never made a picture of Heart so he could photoshop it.

Diva: Like the comic book weiner he is Dan has always admired Matt Murdoch.So he's thinking about becoming a lawyer (and wearing lots of leather), and now that sodomy is legal half the things he could have had you arrested for are off the books. Your life has been an open page of Chud, and if Dan has his druthers he will see you in court with MB transcripts. For you are a second tier nemesis, who shows up in holiday specials, and off issues written by guest writers.

Devil Unicron: If you don't care about Dan's opinion, then what the hell did you post for. You're transparent.

Dances With Chainsaw: Are you still doing the whole "I like to kill hookers" bit?

Old Restless: Your'e new and best known for disliking Hellboy. Which is funny, because Dan was talking to Michael Bay recently and Mike told him you're a dingleberry. wink

Brian: Bass drinkers are Dan's kind of people.

Poxy: The 1980's ended over a long time ago. Your musical taste is somewhere near Patrick Bateman's. Expand on your tired musical sensibilities. Please.

g-dude: less than 500, you get no response.

Rylander: Dan thinks you never understood Pizza Kid, but hey. That's all right.

Jonas: People think you're creepy for a lot of reasons, many of which have been cited before. You should know this by now, so asking for an honest opinion's going to net you things you don't like. Either learn from this or it will be your prison.

Micah: Dan thinks sometimes you indulge your writing skills to the point where it's obvious you're just looking to keep talking. Otherwise, your'e a Chud All-star and you know it.

Slater: Besides the obvious bash (which Dan feels has played itself out), you backed out on being a nemesis, which means you'd be a good prison roomate for Dan if he ever needed extra smokes.

Momotaro: Dan knows you best through Chewers be damned photoshoping more than he knows your posts. He's not sure if that's a good thing or not. But reading comics all the time keeps him busy.

Gruber: Your'e the mohawk kid, right? How Jodie Foster doing?

Jacob Astrom: You're small time on Chud. Post more, and Dan will hate you more. See how it works?

Jankis: Dan can't remember to forget you.

Aghora: ______________

Fuck it. I'm looking to start a fight with somebody today anyway. Give me both barrels, you son of a bitch.

Alice, Dan is sick of all the guys who hit on the few women who bother to get on Chud. He thinks that inter-flirting is a gross pastime, only a notch above cybersex. He was also thinking of vacationing in London and wondered if a sweet young thing such as yourself might eat a packet of crisps with him.

Please?

Let's have it, Shecky.

Are you man enough, nay, crazy enough?

Hmmm, how surprising that Andre tries to steal the spotlight. And they say Diva's need all the attention.

He's just being a good father.

Katanga: Naming yourself after a character in Raiders of the Lost Ark makes you a pretty big nerd, but a slightly obscure character from Raiders? Unless you're a big George Harris fan from way back (and who didn't love him in Flash Gordon) then you should try and go out at night instead of flash animating.

CTDelude: Dan enjoys some of your posts in an ironic way, as sometimes it appears that your sentences are found art; as if someone cut up a newspaper and put words together for purely aesthetic reasons. That said, you love Asian films, which shows you have some taste.

Thanks for the attempt, Andre. But I'm tired of waiting for Dan, so I'll do it myself.

BobClark- Your name is bland. You should have stuck with AlanOrmsby. But, most people won't recognize that 70's schlock filmmaker either, so why bother?
Your lack of internet savvy coupled with your own false sense of superiority keeps you at arms length from the Chewers. You are embarrassed you spend as much time here as you do, and yet you keep coming back. You tell yourself you're better than most of the obsessed loser geeks who frequent CHUD, but that is just to mask your own sense of self-loathing. You wish everyone here thought you were clever and likable. Your distaste for all the love and hero-worship directed towards Nick is partially the result of jealousy.
You are poop.

Classic.