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Anyone else receiving hilarious e-mails from Jamie Poole? - Page 2

post #51 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:09am
Quote:
"I would KILL you and show your wife what a real man is after kicking the shit out of you in front of your worthless kids."
I think it's very easy to interpret this as a death threat AND a rape threat. American police certainly would, at any rate.
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post #52 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:12am
My God is this kid fucked up.

He needs to find a hobby--other than hate emailing everyone at CHUD!
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post #53 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:12am
Quote:
Decline and Fall of Alice's Empire:
Quote:
Jennifer:
We have got to have a CHUD London meet up. And soon. We can all get all drunk and slaggy (each of us to our own degree) and go to the movies. In that order. And if we wanted to be really immature, which we don't really, we could prank call Jamie all night.
"Hi, do you have Dr. Pepper in a can?"

Oh, the hilarity!

Well, *I'd* laugh.

Actually, nothing makes movies more entertaining than watching them loaded. It certainly worked for Attack of the Clones - God bless midnight screenings, and late bars!

We really should sort out a meet in London (or Manchester, since I can drive now). I'm easy. Well, not quite as easy as my above posts might imply, but pretty easy.
"No? Then what about Mr. Pibb?"

I saw ATOTC wasted as well! And I still hated it! ;p

London or Birmingham are good for me. I've started a thread for discussion in the Regional forum...
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post #54 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:13am
He keeps going on and on about "what's sad" when in reality(something he's obviously unfamiliar with), what's sad is that he got banned from a message board. Then, he kept/keeps coming back and sending hate mail. Does he have a life? Judging by his HI-larious picture, I'm going to guess not. What a tool. By the way, is there anything to the Iamlegend username being yet another Poole clone?

"Begun this clone war has."
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post #55 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:15am
Quote:
swykk is tryin' to be the shephard:

"Begun this clone war has."
Brilliant.

Perfect thread for ATOTC, and especially that quote, to be referenced in.

But at this point, I don't think IamLegend is Jamie. Time will tell...
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post #56 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:18am
Quote:
Jennifer:
Quote:
swykk is tryin' to be the shephard:

"Begun this clone war has."
Brilliant.

Perfect thread for ATOTC, and especially that quote, to be referenced in.

But at this point, I don't think IamLegend is Jamie. Time will tell...
Seconding the quote love.

If IamLegend *were* Jamie, there is no power on earth that would stop him from running over and sinking his little pitbull teeth into this thread.
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post #57 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:25am
You're a wry fucker, Manning. CT should be proud. Funniest dead pan I've read all year.

London meet. England, somewhere. All good.
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post #58 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:39am
At this point I feel that he's served his time, learned his lesson and should be welcomed back to CHUD with open arms.

What?
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post #59 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:50am
This thread has taken pot shots at...

- The Elephant Man

- Dr Pepper

- Attack of The Clones

I'll do jamiepoole one better. I hate you ALL.
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post #60 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:53am
If you like Dr. Pepper, then you are SATAN!!!
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post #61 of 219
9/2/03 at 11:56am
I must be worse than Satan then, because my bodily fluids likely consist of 10% Dr Pepper on any given day. All other soft drinks are pure cock shite in comparison.

However, I'll point out that I've never had a Dr Pepper bottled in the UK. Perhaps they destroy it over there.
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post #62 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:03pm
To be fair, it was Angamie Vlaoole who fuckwittedly bought up The Elephant Man...

Mildly amusing story: I was once perusing the video shelves of my local store a while back and this woman picked up The Elephant Man, showing it to her friend. Her friend said "Oh, that's such a sad film" to which her friend replied, "Isn't it - I mean, imagine being called 'John Merrick'."
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post #63 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:04pm
No, I tried it in the States, and it was pure evil. Tinned.

I was being driven somewhere in a car, and in my desire to a) appear polite, which was conflicting with my other desire b) to hold that shit as far away from myself as possible, I ended up spilling it in the car and spent an hour in the Topanga Canyon heat with the stench of it rising around me.

My memory remains hazy despite the hypnotherapy, but I do remember that Zoarg the Flayer of Virgins appeared to me in a vision and urged me to kill for his greater glory. Or possibly he was asking for directions to Bakersfield. It was a long time ago, I was very young, and I'm still confused about a lot of the things that happened after the Burger King cup hit that carpet.
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post #64 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:06pm
Quote:
David Manning:
His ire would be better directed at his barber.
Perhaps the haircut is the source of his incomprehensible rage. Move on, Jamie, it will build charecter.
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post #65 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:07pm
God, Jamie is hilarious, yet a big fuckin moron at the same time.
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post #66 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:09pm
Quote:
Decline and Fall of Alice's Empire:
the Burger King cup
Ah! Riddle solved, then.
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post #67 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:13pm
So, if I'd've bought it from Carl's Jnr, would I have got a different demon?
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post #68 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:13pm
I'm very glad he doesn't have my e-mail address. I had a hilarious conversation with him via messenger a little while back. His rage issues crack me up every time. I half expected him to take a crap in a box and mail it to Hellboy and Slater by now. He is probably too busy watching Resident Evil...
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post #69 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:16pm
Quote:
Decline and Fall of Alice's Empire:
So, if I'd've bought it from Carl's Jnr, would I have got a different demon?
Nope, Dr. Pepper is still ass in a can.
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post #70 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:19pm
Quote:
kittyinjammies:
Quote:
Decline and Fall of Alice's Empire:
So, if I'd've bought it from Carl's Jnr, would I have got a different demon?
Nope, Dr. Pepper is still ass in a can.
And so the Great Wheel turns full circle...
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post #71 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:21pm
Mmmmmmm. StalkerMail!

Seriously, does anyone like that have a job?

Wait....
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post #72 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:21pm
I'm really starting to dislike you CHUD women.
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post #73 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:23pm
Quote:
Carl Cunningham®:
I'm really starting to dislike you CHUD women.
What did I do?
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post #74 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:24pm
Why? The less we drink the more there is left for you.

The less we drink of the drink of EVIL, that is.
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post #75 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:28pm
Dr. Pepper is not evil, where else can you find a drink devoted to the Plum?

This thread is hilarious. But, seriously, you guys and gals are assholes.
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post #76 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:32pm
Quote:
prala is just for jk:
Quote:
Carl Cunningham®:
I'm really starting to dislike you CHUD women.
What did I do?
Oh, that wasn't direct towards you, prala. I was referring to Alice and Kitty's disdain for my life-giver, Dr Pepper.

And I was trying to do so with my biting sense of humor WITHOUT the use of emoticons. But I suppose I failed. Without those little annoying smilies, my sarcasm merely comes across as irreverent.

Now, back to you, Alice:

Let's see...

You hate AOTC. Check.

You hate Dr Pepper. Check.

You're English, I'm Irish. Check.

We're all set to wage battle, love.
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post #77 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:32pm
The next person that disses the Dr. Pepper (diet, for me at least) gets his or her home address and phone number mailed to Jamiepoole. Back off fuckers, this thing is loaded...
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post #78 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:35pm
You are a Dr. Pepper apologist.

Note: that was directed at Carl, and I love Dr. Pepper.
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post #79 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:35pm
Quote:
Jacob Singer:
The next person that disses the Dr. Pepper (diet, for me at least) gets his or her home address and phone number mailed to Jamiepoole. Back off fuckers, this thing is loaded...
Hey, I live in the Dr. Pepper capitol of the world. I still hate it. Ick, yuck, gag.
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post #80 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:37pm
I love Dr. Pepper!
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post #81 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:37pm
Well, my grandparents were born in Ireland on my mum's side and my Dad and his folks are all Scottish, so I'll give you a run on hard-drinking (but not of Dr. Pepper) and fighting Celtic spirit any day of the week, you glugger of SIN! You imbiber of WICKEDNESS!!!
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post #82 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:37pm
Quote:
Carl Cunningham®:
Now, back to you, Alice:

Let's see...

You hate AOTC. Check.

You hate Dr Pepper. Check.

You're English, I'm Irish. Check.

We're all set to wage battle, love.
Well, I guess I am on Carl's side, Alice. Sorry.

AOTC, Dr. Pepper, Irish. Check, check, check.
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post #83 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:38pm
But those commercials are so darn funny !
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post #84 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:39pm
Quote:
kittyinjammies:
I still hate it. Ick, yuck, gag.
That's it. The gloves are off, woman!
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post #85 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:42pm
Quote:
Jacob Singer:
Quote:
kittyinjammies:
I still hate it. Ick, yuck, gag.
That's it. The gloves are off, woman!
Bring it on, old man. wink
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post #86 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:43pm
I want in on the hate-mails too! After all I had a nice bout with the little fuckwit over Reloaded. I'd love to see how imaginative his insults to me would be (probably something about me being someone who doesn't shower and smell of cheese I guess).
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post #87 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:45pm
Quote:
Blunt:
(probably something about me being someone who doesn't shower and smell of cheese I guess).
Since when have jamiepoole's insults been accurate?
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post #88 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:45pm
Quote:
Jacob Singer:
The next person that disses the Dr. Pepper (diet, for me at least) gets his or her home address and phone number mailed to Jamiepoole. Back off fuckers, this thing is loaded...
Finally, an ally.

Quote:
Bateman:
You are a Dr. Pepper apologist.
That I am, and unapologetically & happily so.

Quote:
kittyinjammies:
Hey, I live in the Dr. Pepper capitol of the world.
Actually, that would be Dublin, Texas... not Dallas. Or at the very least, Waco.

Quote:
prala:
I love Dr. Pepper!
And I love you!!

Quote:
Alice:
Well, my grandparents were born in Ireland on my mum's side and my Dad and his folks are all Scottish, so I'll give you a run on hard-drinking (but not of Dr. Pepper) and fighting Celtic spirit any day of the week, you glugger of SIN! You imbiber of WICKEDNESS!!!
I'm sorry... but I missed everything after "I'll give you a run on hard..." wink

Quote:
Agent 86:
Well, I guess I am on Carl's side, Alice. Sorry.

AOTC, Dr. Pepper, Irish. Check, check, check.
Agent 86... one of my favorite Chewers.

Quote:
Straxboy:
But those commercials are so darn funny!
Actually, those ARE shit.
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post #89 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:46pm
Quote:
Blunt:
(probably something about me being someone who doesn't shower and smell of cheese I guess).
No. Not cheese.

You are French, right? And he is English? The correct response would be:

Elderberries.
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post #90 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:50pm
Despite my naked and unashamed loathing of Dr. Pepper (the Virgin Mary cries when you drink Dr. Pepper. Apparently she also cries when girls whistle, who knew?) I will admit to having laughed at those ads.
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post #91 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:50pm
In my philosophy class this morning, our teacher said something about France and an outspoken marine yelled from the back row, "fuck the French!" He was met with a long uncomfortable silence. For some reason I find that funny (and appropriate).
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post #92 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:56pm
Quote:
Decline and Fall of Alice's Empire:
Apparently she also cries when girls whistle, who knew
I can think of a billion other things she cries for that I do.
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post #93 of 219
9/2/03 at 12:58pm
I drink Dr. Pepper just so nobody can call me a racist. And just so you know, if Pepsi came into my mouth and started tasting like shit, I would KILL Pepsi right in front of its wife Diet Pepsi and all its worthless Vanilla Pepsi kids, and then I would beat it up too because I don't care how good the big words you use are, if something comes into your mouth and threatens you, you should have the RIGHT to KILL that thing.
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post #94 of 219
9/2/03 at 1:01pm
Quote:
Slater:
I drink Dr. Pepper just so nobody can call me a racist. And just so you know, if Pepsi came into my mouth and started tasting like shit, I would KILL Pepsi right in front of its wife Diet Pepsi and all its worthless Vanilla Pepsi kids, and then I would beat it up too because I don't care how good the big words you use are, if something comes into your mouth and threatens you, you should have the RIGHT to KILL that thing.
Slater is the funny.

But please don't hate on the Pepsi products.
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post #95 of 219
9/2/03 at 1:02pm
Quote:
Agent 86:
No. Not cheese.

You are French, right? And he is English? The correct response would be:

Elderberries.
That's not me, that's my father.
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post #96 of 219
9/2/03 at 1:03pm
Ah, sarcasm will out the truth in any hardened Dr Pepper-ite (which incidentally I'm, entirely on the fence about since I have both enjoyed it's refreshing (over)sweetness, but rarely reach for it as a drink of choice. It's kind of the ginger chocolate: it is chocolate, but always the last one you'd go for)

Baby Jesus will bless jamie for inspiring this banter. If he doesn't kick the shit out of him first.
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post #97 of 219
9/2/03 at 1:07pm
So to sum up this thread: Topics being discussed are Dr. Pepper, this Jamie guy, ass in a can, CHUD women, and, demons of Burger King.

I love CHUD.
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post #98 of 219
9/2/03 at 1:14pm
Ass in a can?

Oh, you mean Bud Lite
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post #99 of 219
9/2/03 at 1:14pm
What is ass in a can?
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post #100 of 219
9/2/03 at 1:15pm
After taking a second look at his Yahoo profile, I realized something. We're all going to be fucked when he becomes a novelist. You see, he's gonna be famous! You think we'll get a chapter or something? "And THESE are the infidels, racists, and all around horrible people that tried to hold me down! It took me YEARS to recover from being banned from CHUD.com. Well, who's laughing now?!"

You watch, chewers, we're going to eat our word...eh, fuck it. I can't even attempt to make this seem serious. This is too much fun.
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