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The Jerk Yourself Off for the Holidays Thread

post #1 of 19
12/24/03 at 4:24pm
Thread Starter 
My life rocks. Sorry, but it's true.

Writing something you enjoy rocks. After five years of writing and four solid months of only sleeping two or three hours a night, my terrible online novel is finally finished. Over 200 pages of material deleted, over 260 pages of brand new material added, rounding it out to a respectable 393 pages, which is by far the longest thing I've ever written. And I fucking love it so much, I really do. Now it's off to an agent, and who knows where it'll go from there, but I don't even care, because SMEAGOL IS FREEEEEEEE! Free to play video games again, to read books again, to write DVD reviews and edit Chudstories for this site again, everything. Free.

My relationship rocks. I've got a fiancee that will buy me a talking Gollum statue and 10 Sandman graphic novels for Christmas, even though she doesn't understand my obsessions, she still feeds my inner geek and goes to see Return of the King with me at least once a week.

My Christmas presents rock. I'm getting the Gollum toy, the Sandman graphic novels, two Hellboy graphic novels, two Fantastic Four graphic novels, five DVDs, a subscription to Xbox Live, and four Xbox games. Beat that, bitches.

My family rocks. My friends rock. Peter Jackson rocks. Every one of you dorklings reading this right now rock, even the ones I don't like very much. Merry Christmas, motherfuckers. I wish you all a life half as good as mine.

So go ahead, jerk yourself off. What kicks ass in your life right now?
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post #2 of 19
12/24/03 at 4:47pm
Glad to hear it's all going so well and the vote of confidence that I rock, made my day even better.

This is my last day ever at a job I truly despise and I couldn't be happier, best part is no one is here and I don't have to do the whole "keep it touch." It won't happen and thats just fine with me because I'm never stepping into a cube EVER again

In a month I'm going back to school and hopefully learn a new language and it's all paid for. Couldn't be happier. 2004 is going to be fucking great.
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post #3 of 19
12/24/03 at 4:51pm
Just a few good things at the moment.

1. I've recieved a major part in a play. Someone I know closely wrote a character just for me after seeing my acting and short film works. We start rehearsals next monday and start touring it locally in March and hopefully beyond. The script is great and I've been memorizing shitloads of lines like a madman.

2. I may be approved for financial aid. After 3 years of scrounging through community college and working dead end jobs paying tuition something beautiful happens. I can go to college without going out of pocket except maybe books. If I am approved this means more money in pocket.

3. I have Alien Quad under the tree right now.

4. I'm on christmas/work vacation till saturday. More time to spend with family and friends.
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post #4 of 19
12/24/03 at 4:55pm
Let the circle jerk begin!

Well, let's see.

1: I'm at the halfway point in my MFA program, and it's going very well. Just got my grades; got two A's (one in a class I was a little worried about).

2. The teaching job is going fine. My boss thought my grades were too high (since when is it bad that four of your kids get B+'s?) but fuck her, I know they did good work and they deserved their grades. I like teaching and I'm looking forward to tackeling another subject next semester.

3. Writing is going okay. Just got a short play published in a lit magazine, which is cool. Sent a couple other plays off to contests. My playwriting prof/mentor is going to try and hook me up with a script reading job, so that's good.

4. Family is fine. Friends are good.

5. Lara. The most important part of my life. She's perfect. I wish I was with her right now.

And that's it.

On the negative side, I'm broke---but hopefully that'll be changing soon.

Merry Christmas, all.
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post #5 of 19
12/24/03 at 7:15pm
Aside from being depressed and down in the dumps... I can look on the bright side. I'll be getting a lot of DVD boxed sets tomorrow, and more money.
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post #6 of 19
12/24/03 at 7:40pm
And when all else fails, you can always make love to Rath.
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post #7 of 19
12/24/03 at 9:14pm
Well, I've had to stick around town for work purposes while my girlfriend went back home to see her family. So at the moment it's just me and the Christmas SPAM, that being the case jerking it for the holidays might be a reality.
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post #8 of 19
12/24/03 at 10:01pm
Let's see.....how does my life rock?

1. My Dad is home in the States for his first Christmas in five years.....and he just retired, so I'll get to see him more often.

2. I just found out I'll be getting a raise Jan 1st and will finally be on a bonus program. (First raise in 2 years)

3. I will be credit card debt free by March 2004! (and can start saving for a nice downpayment on a house).

4. No health problems in 2003 and 2004 is looking to be another great year in that regards.

5. I was able to get my family and close friends what I wanted to give them for Christmas this year.

6. In just a few hours my roomates will be home and we can commence gift unwrapping. In the meantime I am watching my two cats play with their gifts (although the gifts under the tree are holding their attention more).

7. Life is good

Happy Holidays and much love to all.

Howard
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post #9 of 19
12/24/03 at 10:30pm
I just received in the mail yesterday comfirmation that I am getting my winter quarter tuition and books paid for for by a worker retraining grant. I did the paperwork, I interviewed, I went to the orientiations, and it paid off.

The cable guy came today and I now have cable internet access, after four months of using a dial-up modem.

I was able to buy gifts for everyone on my list.

Me, my son, my cat Nicholas, and the extended family are finally settled in with each other, and I have people whom I love and who love me.

I am happy about these things in my life. I hope 2004 brings great things to all the Chewers out there I have come to like so much.
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post #10 of 19
12/24/03 at 11:10pm
1. I'm on break until January 12th
2. My aunt and her fiance, my uncle, and my grandmother are all here for a bit, all the way from Toronto.
3. My christmas presents rock. 40GB IPod, Alien Quadrilogy, LOTR: TTT Extended Edition, Dave Matthews Band- The Central Park Concert CD, and the DVD of the concert, a beautiful flask engraved with "Cheers to Us" from my girlfriend, and other things I do not know of yet.
4. My relationship rules. Couldnt be happier with who I'm with now.
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post #11 of 19
12/25/03 at 9:50am
this german rocks too -

- it was an absolutely satisfying movie year

- since december I can be considered "adult" in the states

- think I'm going to have a new relationship next year (looks good so far)

- got my first publishment this year, and I'll try to get a whole novel out in the next

- saw my two favourite bands metallica and marilyn manson twice this year, will see metallica again in june

- rock am ring festival was great, next year will be great too

- everything's fine with family and friends

- will change locations in autumn of 2004, going to Berlin, starting an education at a tv-station

- end of january will mark the day I can begin shooting my first horror movie (I'll finally have the budget together until then)

- me and 2 geeks managed to pull off an hardcore-12-hour-quake-3-game under the influence of Megadeth's Kill the King, next year we'll do the 24

- my movie website TMR works fine and will rock even more
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post #12 of 19
12/25/03 at 3:33pm

My Stuff

Five Words:

Alien Quadrilogy Box Set Awesome

Unfolded, the f'n thing's as long as my couch.
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post #13 of 19
12/25/03 at 4:52pm

Re: My Stuff

Quote:
Originally posted by DJEvil
Five Words:

Alien Quadrilogy Box Set Awesome

Unfolded, the f'n thing's as long as my couch.
Oh my god, I know. Its amazing.
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post #14 of 19
12/26/03 at 3:37pm
Everybody I love is healthy and happy. I win.
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post #15 of 19
12/26/03 at 3:48pm
About to go on paid vacation for a week.

About to have one of my short stories published in a horror anthology that none of the participants are paying a dime to publish. It's a small press but that's a start.

I may be starting a life changing job by the end of January leaving my compiter geek wage slave life faaaar behind.

I have a wife that loves me even though I can be a lazy, seflish bastard.

I have a daughter and a son that think I hung the moon.

I will have written a crappy 60,000 word novel by the end of February.

I got to meet several really cool Chewers AND watch the LOTR Trilogy all in one day.

I have kept up with my serial for 2 months and some people are actually reading it.
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post #16 of 19
12/27/03 at 1:22am
I finally have a modified car, which means I can actually start planning on leaving home, instead of just talking about it wistfully. Go me.
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post #17 of 19
12/27/03 at 2:43am
I've been in Arizona for a decade now and still haven't been abducted by aliens and anally probed. w00t.
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post #18 of 19
12/27/03 at 4:39am
Quote:
Originally posted by BruceL
I've been in Arizona for a decade now and still haven't been abducted by aliens and anally probed. w00t.
One phone call and I can change that.
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post #19 of 19
12/27/03 at 6:12am
I fingerflip caveman frontboarded a super small rail over the holidays. And my friends from Holland got me a DVD of "Van God Los", a cool dutch crime movie.

Plus, in January I'll head off with them and the parental units to Utah, and spend +/- a week in their "ski-out-the-door-directly-onto-the-mountain" appartment.
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