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Red Water

post #1 of 5
12/27/03 at 4:04pm
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"Dive into a bloody, exciting adventure when a massive man eating bull shark takes over the quiet waters of the Mississippi. Nobody knows what or who is leaving mangled remains until it is revealed that there is one breed of shark that can live in fresh water - a giant carnivore, stalking the living under the surface."

Oh joy, OH JOY!As it turns out, apperently three Shark Attack movies where not enough we're getting another killer shark movie. *slasherfan jumps around excitedly* If the promise of killers sharks isn't enough the movie also promises a cast of Lou Diamond Phillips, Kristy Swanson and Coolio. Also doens't that 12 rating on the box just make it seem all the more cool!
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post #2 of 5
12/28/03 at 2:52am
Actually, RED WATER was a TBS Original movie that debuted this past August. In fact, I wrote about it in my Foyeurism tribute to the TBS Originals called "THE WORST MOVIE STUDIO ON TELEVISION."

Quote:
Ironically, the most recent "TBS Original" to air was also a "nature gone amok" movie but they decided to spice things up by combining it with a heist flick. RED WATER was about a man-eating bull shark, the only kind that can survive in fresh water and isn't really known for being much of a man-eater, gets loose in the bayous of Louisiana. Meanwhile, a gang of crooks, including rapper Coolio who is learning the hard way how quickly 15 minutes of fame can tick away, go looking for an untold fortune that was stashed away in a vintage car, which I believe was underwater in one of these bayous.

Meanwhile, a scummy oil exec has greased some palms in Washington to allow him to set up an oil derrick on one of these rivers. Kristy Swanson, the rich woman's Erika Eleniak, portrays the scummy oil exec's yummy assistant who just happens to be the ex-wife of a hard luck boat captain played by Lou Diamond Philips. I would make a joke about not believing that Kristy Swanson's character would be married to Lou Diamond Philip's character but I know that Kristy Swanson actually used to date Alan Thicke in real life so it's rather hard to dismiss such an unlikely fictional relationship. However, I will make fun of Lou Diamond Philips who really should know better about appearing in a movie like this after starring in the disaster that was BATS.

I'd tell you more about this movie but it literally put me to sleep about a half hour in. A young woman and some kid's grandfather got eaten, Swanson and Philips argued a lot, and Coolio and company schemed. When I woke up they were all on that oil derrick, then they were all in the water with the shark on the prowl, then the money went flying everywhere and Coolio tried to retrieve it only to become a shark snack. Good luck digesting those dreadlocks.

I really don't know if the movie was any damn good or not but the last 5 minutes of it are not to be missed. That's because the way in which the shark dies in this movie rivals if not surpasses the astoundingly goofy way the shark was killed in JAWS: THE REVENGE. They're under the oil derrick and Lou Diamond Philips gets the shark to rise out of the water with its mouth wide open only to get the fully functioning oil drill shoved right into it's mouth all the way down into it's body cavity. The sight of this shark partially out of the water in a vertical position with this drill sticking out of its mouth while it twitches violently is beyond dopey. God, I wish I had taped this movie so I could nab a still of this.
I've never been compelled to go back and fill in the blanks. Its funny though. Everything I've ever heard about bullsharks always said they really weren't all that dangerous. Well, at least not as voracious as the bullshark is in this movie.
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post #3 of 5
12/28/03 at 5:12am
I watched this when it came on, it was an alright time waster.

There are a lot worse.
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post #4 of 5
12/28/03 at 11:14am
Thread Starter 
I'll probably wind up renting this, I'll watch anything!
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post #5 of 5
12/28/03 at 4:45pm
Actually I have heard from multiple sources such as Discovery and books about sharks( I am an avid shark fan, have been ever since I saw Jaws when I was 6) that Bull Sharks are very aggressive and in fact are often the likely culprit in attacks that are thought to be the work of the White Shark, especially in South Africa. Oh, and Red Water is shite.
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