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The Bi-Monthly FUTURAMA Quoting Thread

post #1 of 137
9/10/04 at 1:18pm
Thread Starter 
'All in all, this is one day that Mittens the kitten will not soon forget.'

'Kittens give Morbo gas.'
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post #2 of 137
9/10/04 at 1:39pm
"You can't have characters announce how they feel!
Ooooh, that makes me feel angry!"

And the most commonly occuring quotes from season four:

"We now join our show already in progress" and "Futurama will not be seen tonight"
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post #3 of 137
9/10/04 at 1:49pm
"Good news, everyone!"

"It's a suppository!"

and the combination..."Good news, everyone! It's a suppository!"
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post #4 of 137
9/10/04 at 3:11pm
"Bite my shiny metal Daffodil ass!"-The top six words Bender says.
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post #5 of 137
9/10/04 at 3:51pm
"That´s no ufo, that´s my ass!"
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post #6 of 137
9/10/04 at 5:12pm
The quote so good, they even used it in a commentary again..

"YOU WATCHED IT... YOU CAN'T UNWATCH IT!"

And of course, the best line ever...

"Oooh… A lesson in not changing history from Mr. I'm-my-own-grandpa! Let's get the hell out of here already. Screw history!"
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post #7 of 137
9/10/04 at 5:22pm
"I have made it with a woman. Inform the men."

"All I want in life is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit."

"It's Bender! And he's dead stinking sober!"
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post #8 of 137
9/10/04 at 6:27pm
"...and so the Trekkies were executed in the manner most befitting virgins..."
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post #9 of 137
9/10/04 at 6:32pm
"I think I got ASS whiplash!"
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post #10 of 137
9/10/04 at 7:10pm
"This one's for that little boy that's limboin' up in heaven!"
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post #11 of 137
9/10/04 at 11:20pm
Bender stop scrathing your ax hole

Im Meeting you hippies half way


Scruffy knows who did it
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post #12 of 137
9/11/04 at 3:25am
"Where's the bathroom?"
"The bath-what?"
"The bathroom."
"The what-room?"
"Bathroom!"
"The what-what?"

"Friends! Help! A guinea pig tricked me!"

"Stop eating our young! And it's pronounced 'guacamole'!"
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post #13 of 137
9/11/04 at 4:04am
Mayor of New New York: "Save us, Jesus!"
Jesus Zoidberg: "I help those that help themselves! Nyah-nyah-nyah!"
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post #14 of 137
9/11/04 at 5:24pm
I feel like I've been mauled by Jesus.
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post #15 of 137
9/11/04 at 7:04pm
"YES! He's showing just what a guy with a cannon in his chest can do!"
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post #16 of 137
9/11/04 at 7:23pm
"There. Now Nobody can say that I don't own John Laroquette's spine!"
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post #17 of 137
9/12/04 at 12:50am
Fry- Bender stop youll make god cry
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post #18 of 137
9/12/04 at 1:01am
Fry: Wow they discovered a 20h century pizzeria, come on Bender, i'll show you what my life was like before you met me.
Bender: You mean you existed before you met me?
Fry: Sure, lots of people have.
Bender: INTERESTING
---------------------------
Bender: Are you on the junk Fry?
---------------------------
Bender: You're watching futurama, the show that does not advocate the cooooool crime of robbery
---------------------------
Neutralness: If I don't make it tell my wife I said hello
---------------------------
Bender: I'm not allowed to sing; court order.
---------------------------
Fry: What really killed the dinosaurs?
Super brain: MEEEEEEEEEEE!
---------------------
[after escaping getting his privates removed]
Fry: No one thought I could escape, but I pulled it out
Bender [offscreen]: YEAH JUST LIKE AT THE MOVIE THEATRE, WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

and of course, the best of all

Fry: You're dating a ship? That's like I dated a fat woman, and LIVED INSIDE OF HER, and I would be all nyaaahh nyaahhhh nyaahhhhh
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post #19 of 137
9/15/04 at 6:25pm
Top 25 Moments

Professor:Who are those horrible orange creatures over there?
Glurmo:Why those are the Grunka Lunkas. They work here in the Slurm factory.
Professor:Tell them I hate them.
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post #20 of 137
9/16/04 at 4:41pm
(While watching "Charlie's Angels 3")
Fry: This movie has everything! Explosions and a Vampire!

Which is what I say when I watch LXG & "Van Helsing".....:P
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post #21 of 137
9/21/04 at 11:08am
Fry: "That could be my beautiful soul sitting naked on a couch. If I could just learn to play this stupid thing."
Bender: "Oh, but you can! Though you may have to metaphorically make a deal with the devil. And by devil, I mean Robot Devil. And by metaphorically, I mean.. get your coat."
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post #22 of 137
9/22/04 at 12:43am
"Roswell That Ends Well" is just one great line after another.

"What smells like blue?"

"If, for example, you were to kill your grandfather, you'd cease to exist."
"But existing is basically all I do!"

"General, in all my years of covering top-secret discoveries with sheets, I've never dramatically revealled anything as shocking as this!"

"We tore the universe a new space-hole, alright."

"Fry! Stop interfering with history! I don't wanna have to memorize a bunch of new kings when we get home!"

"I could feel myself fading away, like Greg Kinnear!"

"I'll have a croque massure, the paella, two mutton pills, and a stein of mead."

"We'll have to endure the horrible music of the Big Bopper, and then the horrible tragedy of hs death."

"If it's any consolation, his body was vaoprized, so there's no chance of him coming back as a zombie."
"I'm not worried about that."
"Then you're a braver woman then I."

"Invent NASA and tell them to get off their fannies."

"If you come in peace, surrender or be destroyed. If you're hear to make war, we surrender."

"Choke on that, causality!"
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post #23 of 137
9/22/04 at 12:46am
"As a robot, I can't feel emotions...and that makes me feel sad."-Bender
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post #24 of 137
9/22/04 at 4:50pm
"You still have Zoidberg. You ALL still have Zoidberg!"
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post #25 of 137
9/25/04 at 8:59pm
Derby announcer:....and bringing up the rear it's Lasty!
Bender: GO LASTY.
----------
Bender: I don't recall ever fighting Godzilla but that is SO what I would have done.
----------
Bender: Cram a ham in it you two!
[misses the professers clone and hits Fry]
Bender: Oh, sorry buddy
Fry: It's ok, I had it coming
----------
Deleted scene
Mom: Make that bitch your bitch you bastard!
----------
Fry: Oh no, we're going to crash into those trees!
Leela: Yeah yeah, trees down
Trees: TREES DOWN
FRY: hmmmm, what if you want the trees up?
Trees: TREES UP
[Hits Fry]
Fry: Ughhhh, Trees........down
trees: TREES DOWN
[smacks Fry to the ground]
----------
Orphan: We knw you don't have feelings seeing how you're a robot and all so we drew you this picture
Orphan 2: So if you miss us even just a tiiiiiny bit you can look at it.
Bender: HEY, I smoke a cigar not a candy cane!
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Bender: Purebred human, no vampire in there.
----------
Fry: I will now perform my peoples native dance!
[turns on Van mcCoys "The Hustle]
Leela [Reading]: It says this part of the hustle implores the gods to grant a favor, usually a trans-am.
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post #26 of 137
9/25/04 at 10:42pm
Reader: Finally! Solitude! I can read books for all eternity!
[the Reader's glasses fall off]
The Reader: It's not fair! IT'S NOT... Oh, well, my eyes aren't that bad. I can still read the large print books.
[the Reader's eyes fall out]
The Reader: IT'S NOT... Oh, well, lucky I know Braille.
[the Reader's hands fall off - he screams loudly, only for his tongue to fall out of his mouth - then his head falls off his shoulders]
The Reader: Hmmm. Look at that weird mirror.

I loved the Scary Door show. Heaping twist upon twist, especially so many inspired (ie ripped off) by the Twilight Zone, was great. Wish they had done more of them.
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post #27 of 137
9/25/04 at 10:45pm
"And first prize goes to...THE HYPNO-TOAD. "

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post #28 of 137
9/25/04 at 10:49pm
Well Elzzar likes having his ass kissed

Want me to clamp him boss

I always thought Hermies was from some weird Mr Potato head planet

Were walers on the moon we carry a harpoom
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post #29 of 137
9/25/04 at 10:50pm
Bender: Wait. As men of science, are not your minds open to new ideas? I say, do not judge me until you have tried my way of life for yourselves.

Wernstrum: Young man, you have opened our minds and swayed our hearts. Let us therefore -

Bender: Party!

[Zoidberg puts Miami Sound Machine's Conga on a jukebox and warbles. Enter Fry with a keg and Amy and Hermes with food.]

Farnsworth: Weee!

Let me just add that ever time I see this episode, I absolutely lose it when Conga starts playing. What the hell made them use that song?
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post #30 of 137
9/25/04 at 11:17pm
"Boy, they apparently haven't heard the phrase 'Tone it down' over here..."-Leela landing in a very colorful OZ.
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post #31 of 137
10/1/04 at 3:54am
"This concept of 'wuv' confuses and infuriates me"
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post #32 of 137
10/1/04 at 5:03am
"Ugh, I think there was something funny in that hippy...............my hands are so huge...and they can touch everything...except each other....oh."

"Look! Those disgusting little men are starting to dance!"

"You're vegetarians! No one cares what you do!"

"Yay! I'm useful!"
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post #33 of 137
10/1/04 at 9:07am
Fry: Now he's trapped in a book I wrote, a crummy world of spelling errors and plot holes.
Giant brain: The big brain am winning again! I am the GREETEST! Now I am leaving Earth for NO RAISIN!
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post #34 of 137
10/1/04 at 11:12am
Wow, I can't believe this one hasn't been said yet.

Bender - I can't fight, I'm a conscientious objector.

Fry - A what?

Bender - You know, a coward.
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post #35 of 137
10/1/04 at 12:46pm
Fatbot: I heard that in one single night, you drank a whole keg, streaked across campus, and crammed fifty-eight humans in a phone booth."

Bender: Yeah, well, a lot of them were children . . .
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post #36 of 137
10/1/04 at 1:33pm
Nixon: "Oh, expletive deleted!"

Bender:"Compare your lives to mine and then kill yourselves..."

Mario: "Mamma mia! The red meatball of war has soiled our white pants of piece!"

Fry (seeing Donkey Kong): "Hey, I know that monkey! His name's Donkey!
Professor: "Monkeys can't be donkeys! Stop messing with my mind!"

Professor: "Sweet Zombie Jesus!"

[at the basketball game]
Fry: "I wanna show off my skills..."
Professor: "Will said skills pay the bills?" (great little Beastie Boys reference)

Hermes:"My Manwich!!"

Zoidberg (spying a guinea pig before getting turned into a giant):"What's this? Two meals in one week?"

Giant Zoidberg:"Ah, now Zoidberg is now big! Who's pushing who now? Ah, hello Mr Chase Manhatten Bank...DENY MY CREDIT CARD APPLICATION, WILL YOU!?!? [SMASH! then turns to another building] The famed Apollo theater....BOO ME OFF THE STAGE ON OPEN MIKE NIGHT?!?!?! [SMASH!]
Giant Bender: "Hey, quit wrecking my stuff!
Zoidberg:" Tell it to the claw!"
Giant Bender: "Bite my colossal metal ass!"

"Bubblegum" Tate: "Sweet Clyde, laugh derisively in his face!

Morbo (introducing the presidential candidates):"Puny human number 1..puny human number 2 and Morbo's close personal friend, Richard Nixon...
Nixon: "Hello, Morbo. How's the family?"
Morbo:"Beligerent and numerous..."

[deleted scene]
Professor (talking in his sleep): "What?! The Great Zombie Jesus came back from the dead again?" (or something like that)
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post #37 of 137
10/3/04 at 12:24pm
From “War is the H-word”

Negotiator: "Please gentlemen. We must put an end to the bloodshed. We've all seen too many body bags and ball sacks."
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post #38 of 137
10/5/04 at 10:46pm
"He'll be as strong and flexible as Gumby and Hercules combined!"
"Gumbercules? I love that guy!"

"It's like there's a party in my mouth, and everyone's throwing up!"

"This is the greatest nanosecond of my life! No, THIS one is! THAT one...was...slightly worse. Ooh, so far so good on this one!"
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post #39 of 137
10/6/04 at 11:11pm
"oh...your...god!"
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post #40 of 137
10/6/04 at 11:35pm
Stephen Hawking: "Great. The entire universe was destroyed."
Fry: "Destroyed? Then where are we now?"
Al Gore: "I don't know. But I can darn well tell you where we're not: The universe!"
Nichelle Nichols: *sigh* "Eternity with nerds. It's the Pasadena Star Trek convention all over again."
Gary Gygax: "Anyone wanna play Dungeons & Dragons for the next quadrillion years?"
Nichelle Nichols: "Sure, I guess"
Stephen Hawking: "Yes, please."
Deep Blue: "Pawn to rook A."
Al Gore: "I'm a tenth level vice president!"
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post #41 of 137
11/4/04 at 11:02pm
"Cool your jowels Nixon"
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post #42 of 137
11/5/04 at 9:16pm
-All hail the Hypno-Toad.

-Bender: Shut up baby, I know it. (does the pimp strut)

-Morbo: Hello little man, I WILL DESTROY YOU!!!
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post #43 of 137
11/11/04 at 4:56pm
"Morbo is pleased, but sticky."
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post #44 of 137
11/11/04 at 5:17pm
"We're going as fast as we can! The engine can't go any faster!"
"Not even if we rub it with cheetah blood?"
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post #45 of 137
11/11/04 at 7:15pm
"Great, now the entire universe will be making fun of our mamas."
"I'm just glad my fat, ugly mama isn't alive to see this day."
"Hermes, we can talk about your promiscuous mother later."
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post #46 of 137
11/11/04 at 8:21pm
Zoidberg - "Now open your mouth and let's have a look at that brain."
(Fry opens his mouth)
Zoidberg - "No, not that mouth, the other one."
Fry - "Er.. I only have one."
Zoidberg (Facinated) - "Really?.."
Fry - "Could I see a human doctor?"
Zoidberg - "Young lady, I'm an expert on humans. Now open your mouth and say, 'Vvrrooddd-diii-dooo-ddii-dddooiih!!'"
Fry - "ahem.. 'Vrro-diii-doo-dii-diii-ddddoo!!' '"
Zoidberg - "WHAT?? MY MOTHER WAS A SAINT!!! GET OUT!!!"

Fry: Bender, you're blind stinking sober!
Bender: That's right, I'm sober and crazy and I don't know what I might do.
Fry: Don't do it.
Bender: I don't know what it is yet.

Leela: Wait I want you to promise me that you won't get behind the wheel without some kind of alcoholic beverage in your hand.

Leela: Look at that 5 o'clock rust. You've been up all night not drinking, haven't you.
Bender: Hey, what I don't do, is none of your business.
Leela: Please Bender, have some malt liquor, if not for yourself, then for the people who love you.
Bender: I hate the people who love me, and they hate me.

Zapp Brannigan: These new uniforms are pretty snappy, ey, first officer?
Kif: I suppose captain, I'm not as a big a fan of velour as you are. Now what do you want to do about that unidentified ship?
Zapp: Destroy them! Mmmm, that's got a nice feel to it.

Zapp: Captain's Journal stardate.. Uuuuuh...
Kif: Ouuu April 13th.
Zapp: April 13th.2 We have failed to uphold Brannigan's law; however, I did make it with a hot alien babe, and in the end is that not what man has dreamt since first he looked up at the stars? Kif I'm asking you a question.
Kif: Oooouuhh

Bender: Cheese it!

Bender: That was my last beer, you bastard! I'll kill you!
Fry: I'll kill you too, buddy. I'll kill you, too.

Walter Koenig (Chekov): When we woke up, we had these bodies.
Fry: Say it in Russian.
Walter Koenig: Ven ve voke up, ve had these vodies.
Fry: Now say "nuclear wessels".
Walter Koenig: NO.

Professor Farnsworth: Holy Zombie Jesus!!!

Bender: Bending's my middle name.
Fry: It is?
Bender: Yes. It's Bender Bending Rodriguez.

Bender: Hey. What kind of party is this? There's no booze and only one hooker.

Bender: Fry cracked corn and I don't care,
Leela cracked corn, I still don't care,
Bender cracked corn and he is great!
Take that you stupid corn!

Hermes: My Man-wich!
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post #47 of 137
11/14/04 at 11:35pm
With my last breath, I curse zoidbergggggggggggg! Ahh that never fails to make me laugh.
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post #48 of 137
11/14/04 at 11:39pm
Leela: Burn on that old crew. The only things they did better than us were suck and die.
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post #49 of 137
12/9/04 at 12:42pm
From last night's Cartoon Network rerun:

Worm: "Ok we'll leave, but one day you'll be eating a fast food burger and BOOM, and you'll be crawling with us again. Ever wonder what makes special sauce so special? Yo!"
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post #50 of 137
6/1/05 at 11:36am
Uhura: "Wait! What if Fry was supposed to get frozen?"
Hawking: "Yes. Put him the tube. It was my idea."

Scary Door Scientist: "I have have created a device that will combined parts from the most evil animals in the world to create the most evil animal ever!"
*chamber opens*
Man: "It turns out it's man."

Leela: "Now Professor, remember that Bender's Santa Claus now, so we don't want to hurt him, okay?"
*Bender comes down the chimney dressed as Santa. Professor promptly shoots him*
Leela: Professor!! Don't you remember what I told you?!
Professor: NO!!!
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