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Misheard Lyrics Chewer Databank

post #1 of 34
Thread Starter 
Song: Green Day, 'Jesus of Suburbia.'

Actual Lyrics: "The Jesus of Suburbia/From the bible of 'none of the above"

I Heard: "The Jesus of Suburbia/With the bible of North Vietnam"
post #2 of 34
Actual lyric: I been through the desert on a horse with no name.

What my retard roommate heard: I been through the desert on a horse with no legs.

Cuz that makes sense.

Edit: The name of the song is A Horse with No Name....dumbass
post #3 of 34
Rolling Stones " I wanna be your pizza burnin" Thats my favorite
post #4 of 34
For some reason, the lyrics to Five For Fighting's Superman, the way they are sung, sound like different words to me....

Real lyric:
I’m only a man in a silly red sheet
Digging for kryptonite on this one way street
Only a man in a funny red sheet
Looking for special things inside of me

What I hear:
... Looking for special things in sodomy
post #5 of 34
NIN, "The Perfect Drug"

Actual lyrics:
"My blood wants to say hello to you/My fears want to get inside of you"


Misheard (by my 8 year old nephew):
"My butt wants to say hello to you/My beard's gonna get a sight of you"
post #6 of 34
Kelly Clarkson Since You've Been Gone

She Says:
But since you've been gone
I can breathe for the first time
Im so movin on
Yeah yeah
Thanks to you
Now I get
What I want

I hear:
But since you've been gone
I can breathe for the first time
Im so movin on
Yeah yeah
Thanks to you
I cant.. I cant find my Bong!
post #7 of 34
Enter Sandman by Metallica

What is really said: Off to never never land.

What my dad heard: Awful heavy metal band.

oddly appropriate
post #8 of 34
"Furious Angels" - Rob Dougan

Actual lyric: "You're a dirty needle, you're in my blood and there's no curin' me"

What I hear: "You're a dirty needle, you're in my butt and there's no curin' me"
post #9 of 34
Van Halen: Runnin' With The Devil

What I just found out the words were last year:
I got no love, no love you'd call re-al

What I had thought he said all along:
I got no love, no love in Korea!
post #10 of 34
Song: I'm Still In Love, by Sean Paul

Lyrics: (Chorus) I'm still in love... with you boy.

What I hear: (Chorus) I'm still in love... with Uwe Boll.
post #11 of 34
Prince, Batdance.

Actual lyric: "Get the funk up.. Batman"

What I heard: "Get the fuck out.. Batman!"
post #12 of 34
ELO's "Evil Woman"

Real: "You're an evil woman!"

In my head: "Medieval woman!"
post #13 of 34
In my search for the actual lyrics to Funkytown, I came across this site.

link

Imagine my surprise that the misheard lyric that I was going to post was listed there.

Actual: Won't you take me to... Funkytown?

Misheard: Won't you take me to... my guitar?

There are some great ones in that list.
post #14 of 34
A great lyrical debate between a friend and I about 7 years ago...
Me (singing to myself): "Hold me closer tiny daaaancer...."
Friend: "did you just say tiny dancer?"
Me: "yeah, that's the line in the song"
Friend: "no you idiot, it's "hold me close I'm tired of dancing" "
Me: "well, that actually makes more sense, but I'm pretty sure it's tiny dancer"
Friend: "why the fuck would it be tiny dancer, that makes no fucking sense (laugh's at me)"
Me: "I'm pretty sure dude, but I'll check"
I later realized that the name of the damned song is Tiny Dancer, and I made sure to call him an Ass when I verified. I also love where somewhere someone misinterpreted it as "Hold me closer Tony Danza"
post #15 of 34
Hot Hot Heat's "Bandages"

Actual: Bandages, bandages, bandages
I heard: Blame the Jews, blame the Jews, blame the Jews
post #16 of 34
" 'scuse me, while I kiss this guy..." is a great website for misheard lyrics.

http://www.kissthisguy.com/
post #17 of 34
Bad Religion - The Quickening

Actual Lyric - "But who will bear the mark of Cain?"

What I heard the first few times - "But who will bathe our Michael Caine?"
post #18 of 34
From my mom:

J. Geils' Band -- Freezeframe

Actual lyric: "Freezeframe...Freezefraaame..."

My mom hears: "Freight Train...Freight Traaaiiin..."
post #19 of 34
Quote:
Originally Posted by Martianman
From my mom:

J. Geils' Band -- Freezeframe

Actual lyric: "Freezeframe...Freezefraaame..."

My mom hears: "Freight Train...Freight Traaaiiin..."

That reminds me...

My mother heard Salt N Peppa's "Push It" and thought they were saying "Smush it."
post #20 of 34
doesn't it go, "push it oooooouuuuuut, smush it."?
post #21 of 34

Misheard Lyrics

Keeping with the Urban/Fogerty theme


But the Grace of God - Keith Urban

Actual lyrics:
I can see that old man, he's walking past our door

Misheard:
I can see that old man, he's walking past Al Gore.



Bad Moon on the Rise - CCR

Often mistaken for:
There's a bathroom on the right
post #22 of 34
Quote:
Originally Posted by Seemill
doesn't it go, "push it oooooouuuuuut, smush it."?
Ha! No, the lyrics are: "push it, push it real good."
post #23 of 34

So, this was playing on the office radio today...

 

 

...and one of the girls in the office somehow managed to convince those around her that the guy was singing about getting the wrong takeaway meal delivered, with the pre-chorus lyrics being "Would you like a Lebonese?" and then something about "ham and cheese" before eventually proclaiming "Look what you've got!"

 

As such, I cannot hear unhear this when I now listen to the song.

post #24 of 34
Hold me closer, Tony Danza.
post #25 of 34

Eagles: I'm lookin' for a lover that won't blow my cover

 

Me: I'm looking for a lover that won't blow my brother

 

 

 

U2: Where the streets have no names

 

Me: Where the sheets have no stains

 

(I'm rolling over there now)

post #26 of 34

"Got my spider, got my Orange Crush."

 

I have recently since learned that it doesn't quite go like that.

post #27 of 34

Pink Floyd:

Haven't you heard, it's a battle of words

The poster bearer cried

 

Me:

Haven't you heard, it's a battle of words

And most of them are lies

 

Still like my version better.

post #28 of 34
I'm in love with a sheep again . . .

I'm in love with your doggy.
post #29 of 34
Actual lyrics: I want to get dressed...for success!

What my dumb ass heard for years: I want to get dressed...FOR SOME SEX!

Still kind of prefer my version...
post #30 of 34

I was disappointed to hear that my favorite hockey anthem doesn't feature Michael Jackson singing: "'cause this is thriller - thriller ON ICE".

post #31 of 34

So, this song keeps playing on the office radio....

 

 

..and the girl sitting next to the radio keeps singing (instead of "Our love was strong as a lion") "Our love was as strong as Aladdin".

 

I haven't had the heart to correct her but Aladdin isn't the first person you think of when it comes to physical strength, is he?

post #32 of 34

Why is there a young girl in your office?

:D

post #33 of 34

Dave Barry did a whole essay on misheard lyrics that was hilarious. One of the examples he used, from The Beach Boys' "Help Me Rhonda":

 

Woke up this morning, I got owls puking in my bed.

post #34 of 34
I get in my car this afternoon to drive home from a seminar and hear Pink Floyd's Mother. After 21 years I realize the last line is not an apology but a question.

Mother, I didn't mean to be so high.

I... should... probably... just... kill myself.
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