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Tired Shit - Page 4

post #151 of 3025
4/21/08 at 3:13pm
Some random student came up to me today and hugged me then walked off.

I'm staff. This was both disturbing and confusing.

Plus i'm not big on being hugged by ugly people.
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post #152 of 3025
4/21/08 at 5:49pm
Reheating fish in the work break room.

Smells like a nasty whore house when you do that. Stop it!
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post #153 of 3025
4/22/08 at 2:36pm
I really wish most of my co-workers were under house arrest. In another state. Or another planet, really.

(Not my two bosses, because they're cool. Also not the other admin I work with. But everyone else, yeah. Dickheads.)
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post #154 of 3025
4/22/08 at 2:50pm
The woman who works "Cool beans" into every single conversation, all of which puncture the eardrums of the entire office due to her piercing squeal of a voice.

She just needs to stop. Breathing.
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post #155 of 3025
4/22/08 at 3:04pm
I was talking to a client today and the fucker just kept moving closer and closer to me. I hate that. At a point I started thinking whether kissing or head-butting him would be better at saying "Get the fuck away from me".
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post #156 of 3025
4/22/08 at 3:08pm
OK people. I have a desk and chairs are on the opposite side of the desk from me for a reason. Sit and talk to me there. Do not invite yourself to MY side of the desk, standing over my shoulder, making any kind of conversation awkward.
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post #157 of 3025
4/22/08 at 3:09pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by stelios View Post
I was talking to a client today and the fucker just kept moving closer and closer to me. I hate that. At a point I started thinking whether kissing or head-butting him would be better at saying "Get the fuck away from me".
Oh, I HATE that! I always make a point of taking a few steps back when people do that, if they comment on it I just say that I have 'personal space issues'
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post #158 of 3025
4/22/08 at 3:54pm
Things I'm tired of:

Dungeons and Dragons.

Smash Brothers, whatever that is.

I'm also tired of trying to work between two people who feel the need to discuss these things, and only these things, while I'm trying to work between them. And I get looked at like I'm the bad guy for asking people not to shout about games and toys to their buddies over my head. It's rapidly becoming tired shit.
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post #159 of 3025
4/22/08 at 4:04pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Seabass Inna Bun View Post
I'm also tired of trying to work between two people who feel the need to discuss these things, and only these things, while I'm trying to work between them. And I get looked at like I'm the bad guy for asking people not to shout about games and toys to their buddies over my head. It's rapidly becoming tired shit.
I think I know what you're talking about, considering the hour-long conversation my cubicle neighbors had just this afternoon over ToyFare magazine.
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post #160 of 3025
4/22/08 at 5:54pm
Upskirt pictures. Especially with visable underwear. Women run around on the beach wearing thongs, and celebrity sites still lose their shit over a panty flash.
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post #161 of 3025
4/22/08 at 6:52pm
The guy who told me the story about finding a $50 bill in some pants he bought. THREE TIMES.

The first time was okay, because finding a $50 bill in your pants pocket is actually pretty thrilling. The second time was kind of annoying, but I let it slide, because hey- it's a free $50, and I can get behind being excited about that.

But by the third time he told me the story (complete with a full-blown pantomime of reaching into his pocket, pulling out an imaginary bill, and looking surprised), I just got confused and angry. I wasn't sure how to react to it. Should I placate him by pretending to be surprised (yet again) by the big reveal at the end of the story? Should I politely ask him to stop telling me the same story over and over again? Or should I pull a Jeanne Dixon and psychic him out by predicting the end of his story before he does?
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post #162 of 3025
4/22/08 at 6:56pm
Do you work with Leonard Shelby? Cut him some slack.
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post #163 of 3025
4/22/08 at 7:07pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by billylove View Post
Reheating fish in the work break room.

Smells like a nasty whore house when you do that. Stop it!
I second that. It happens all of the time in an office that I work in. Stinks so fucking bad.
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post #164 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:27pm
I bought a Boston Market grilled chicken salad last Thursday. Since they're pretty big, I only finished half, and left the rest in the fridge. I didn't work on Friday.

On Monday, I go to the fridge in anticipation of my delicious salad, but I find that the bowl is missing. I walk to the trash, and, sure enough, there's my half-full salad bowl. In a bout of cowardly rage, I run to my computer and print out a one-page banner that reads "KEEP YOUR MITTS OFF MY GODDAMN EIGHT-DOLLAR SALAD YOU FUCKS!! THERE ARE FIVE FRIDGES ON THIS FLOOR ALONE. THANKS FOR NOT BEING LAZY ASSHOLES."

So today, somebody trolled my real-life bait thread by scrawling the following beneath my message:

"WELL MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T USE THE FRIDGE AS YOUR PERSONAL GROCERY!"

And then she signed it with her initials: "K.S."

The thing is, there are TWO women with the initials K.S. in this particular lab. It's either Kelly or Karen. I'll bet it's Karen. Fuck it, they're both on my shit list now.
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post #165 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:29pm
But was the half salad eaten or just thrown away?
That makes a lot of difference.
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post #166 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:31pm
You know what this means. It's time to toss her salad.

Amirite?
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post #167 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:32pm
It was just thrown away. This is the utmost in rudity.
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post #168 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:33pm
Wait... so the salad was in the fridge over the weekend?

You're a braver man than I thought.
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post #169 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:35pm
Yeah, they may have done you a favor. Even refrigerated, Thursday-Monday is a long time for a salad to stand by. Still, I'd probably be horked off too.
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post #170 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:37pm
Side Note: Jason, nice to see you posting again.
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post #171 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:38pm
I'll make that judgment. I'm the salad owner. K.S. is an interloper.
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post #172 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:40pm
It could've been in there two weeks; it's the principle of the thing. I am currently dealing with an "anonymous" note-writing neighbor at the moment, so I'm feeling your pain here, Minsky. Is yours a haggard old bitty like mine?
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post #173 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:42pm
Karen's older, and she's the odds-on favorite.
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post #174 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:42pm
Salads are dumb. K.S. did you a favor.
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post #175 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:44pm
What are the weights? If I'm going to wager I need to know what kind of weight is going to be behind those punches.
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post #176 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:47pm
I must admit that i throw food out of the office fridge too.
The guys here just leave it there to rot. We remove food once or twice every two weeks. If i know it's going to be eaten, i don't touch it. But the office is small and i know the guys here. I know when it's safe to throw it.
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post #177 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:52pm
Your three day weekend came with an $8 (well, $4) price tag.
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post #178 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:53pm
The proper thing is to send out the "the fridge is being cleaned out Friday afternoon" all-call email. Then clean house.

Yep. I've been completely assimilated by corporate America. Good times.
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post #179 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:54pm
Yep, we do the same here- in fact, it's my turn to clean the fridge at the end of the month. The salad removal was unsanctioned.
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post #180 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:55pm
Then unleash Hell, my friend.
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post #181 of 3025
8/12/08 at 5:56pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Minsky View Post
Yep, we do the same here- in fact, it's my turn to clean the fridge at the end of the month. The salad removal was unsanctioned.
Perfect time for some revenge!
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post #182 of 3025
8/12/08 at 6:17pm
God I needed this thread, thanks to whoever bumped it.

I have a manager who continually decides not to take her lunch even though the person working the customer service desk (who nine times out of ten is one of the other managers who's simply not wearing the name tag) or one of the other cashiers such as myself can handle it. She will then loudly tell us that she didn't take her lunch because it was so damn busy and she's been on her feet all day and didn't even get her lunch because it was so busy etc.

I would understand if it really was that busy but it hardly ever is.

I also made the mistake of asking this person for advice about a month ago when a co-worker who apparently is in love with me got my number out of the store directory (the kind that's usually there so when you call in sick they can give you people's numbers so you can call them to work for you) and texted me thirty five times in one night. I was concerned this would spill over into the work place and wanted to know what I could do in case things got out of hand. Too bad this particular manager is the madam of the gossip whore brothel and I didn't know it at the time. A friend of mine who used to work at the store and has since left said she was discussing it with current co-workers at the bar the other night.
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post #183 of 3025
8/12/08 at 8:06pm
Being asked the same things and hearing the same conversation every single day at work, despite trying to break the cycle. It takes herculean effort after a while to tell your supervisor that yes, the reports weren't bad today, as they have been over the entire year...I also see exactly the same people on the way to work, walking in just about the same places at the day before. Actually, just about everything is always the same, all the time. Really sucks any wonder out of life.
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post #184 of 3025
8/13/08 at 9:42am
I hope dreary louse makes the same post again today.
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post #185 of 3025
8/13/08 at 11:40am
I have this bitch female coworker from New Jersey who is thankfully leaving for another job in a month to be in the FBI (and she's already got such smug, douchebag cop entitlement tone about her), and she gives me shit any time she needs something from me or I need something.

I'm a bank teller, and sometimes I need a supervisor's approval for something because I'm conducting a transaction that's over my allowable limit. When I try to get my supervisor over, this coworker will ask me, "Need anything?"

"My supervisor."

"What do you need?"

"That's for him to know."

Ok, that doesn't sound bad. But it's bad because she does it almost every time I move away from my station and anytime I need something that she can't help me with, and with the amount of actual bitching she does at me and calling me crazy and gangs up on me another coworker (like one time getting her to shove me into a wall just to hear me scream, which she laughed her ass off about). She always has a "Fuck off" tone in her voice.

That, and she'll baby me in front of a customer to show me something I know how to and that I do hundreds of times a day.

I try and get her back every chance I get by insulting her and keeping things from her that she needs, but how can I really dig into her?
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post #186 of 3025
8/13/08 at 11:58am
With an ice cream scoop.
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post #187 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:07pm
And how do I suck away at her life?
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post #188 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:08pm
Bring her doughnuts every morning.
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post #189 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:09pm
People like that feed on pissing others off. Ignoring her/being as nice as pie will probably drive her crazier than anything.
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post #190 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:15pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by stunt poop View Post
(and she's already got such smug, douchebag cop entitlement tone about her)
Yeah, that's gotta suck.

Quote:
(like one time getting her to shove me into a wall just to hear me scream, which she laughed her ass off about)
What the fuck!?

Quote:
how can I really dig into her?
With all-terrain tires? Also useful for sucking away life. Quickly.

Seriously, though... you work in a bank? Assuming the place is covered in cameras, can you get videos of some of this fucking psycho's behavior to the FBI with a note explaining that this woman is a lawsuit waiting to happen, and she wants to be an agent? Sounds like you'd be doing the country a favor.
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post #191 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:17pm
Frat boys in line to see Pineapple Express, going into great detail about what the "shocker" is and how to execute it, wearing heavy eyelids and big, dopey, beer stained grins. As if they invented this shit. Such a sad, tired, boring, humorless cliche.
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post #192 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:21pm
Quote:
(like one time getting her to shove me into a wall just to hear me scream, which she laughed her ass off about)
I always wondered what became of Sweetchuck!
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post #193 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:24pm
Thread Starter 
Stunt Poop, I recommend a good and thorough raping in the employee bathroom. Be sure to keep her head in the toilet while you violate her. This way you'll earn her respect.
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post #194 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:27pm
During said raping you can show her why they call you "stunt poop"
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post #195 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:30pm
Thread Starter 
Put an ironic twist on things.
After you finish and threaten her life if she tells anyone, you can mention that you really wanted to rape the manager. This should put an end to her meddling.
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post #196 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:34pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Minsky View Post
I bought a Boston Market grilled chicken salad last Thursday. Since they're pretty big, I only finished half, and left the rest in the fridge. I didn't work on Friday.

On Monday, I go to the fridge in anticipation of my delicious salad, but I find that the bowl is missing. I walk to the trash, and, sure enough, there's my half-full salad bowl. In a bout of cowardly rage, I run to my computer and print out a one-page banner that reads "KEEP YOUR MITTS OFF MY GODDAMN EIGHT-DOLLAR SALAD YOU FUCKS!! THERE ARE FIVE FRIDGES ON THIS FLOOR ALONE. THANKS FOR NOT BEING LAZY ASSHOLES."

So today, somebody trolled my real-life bait thread by scrawling the following beneath my message:

"WELL MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T USE THE FRIDGE AS YOUR PERSONAL GROCERY!"

And then she signed it with her initials: "K.S."

The thing is, there are TWO women with the initials K.S. in this particular lab. It's either Kelly or Karen. I'll bet it's Karen. Fuck it, they're both on my shit list now.
You should look into this: http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/.
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post #197 of 3025
8/13/08 at 12:59pm
So many good ideas for retaliation. So little time.

Seriously, I fucking hate this woman.
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post #198 of 3025
8/13/08 at 1:08pm
When you open the refrigerator at my office it smells like someone left diarrhea in it. I can't get mad at a clean out, no matter how much it jumps the gun. There's a half-drunk Sierra Mist bottle that's been in there since late last year. I feel sorry for it. I can't bring myself to throw it out. I know it's not causing the smell and is taking up space for something that will cause diarrheasmells in the future.
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post #199 of 3025
8/13/08 at 1:10pm
I have a co-worker who can't simply say, "I need to run down to the mail room." No, it's "I have some letters that need to go out to some vendors that need to get in the mail right away, and also some packages that need to go out, so if it's okay with you, I'm going to run down to the mail room and take care of all of this real quick. Is that okay?" Jesus god, yes, it's fine, if it takes as long as you telling me about it I'll have some peace and quiet for a while.
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post #200 of 3025
8/13/08 at 1:13pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by stunt poop View Post
So many good ideas for retaliation. So little time.

Seriously, I fucking hate this woman.
Get her address and get her some subscriptions to some porn mags, the nastier the better.

You can also get some fertilizer, and late at night, spell out some choice words on her front lawn. Only way to get rid of it is to hose it off, so the areas that you covered in fertilizer will remain much greener than the rest of her lawn.
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