The B Action Movie Thread - Page 321

Yes, the USA Network

"July ees a DAMME good muunth on USA!"

R2 DVD of I COME IN PEACE (DARK ANGEL) is going for the princely sum of 9.99 delivered on play.com.

I was all fired up to order the Seagal boxset off HMV and the damn site goes down!

But I did end up getting BREAKDOWN off play for 2.99, love that movie.

All this talk about Virtuosity made me relook at the Sci-fi Action flciks from the 90's. I've got a few Script Books in my house. Two of them were Johnny Mnemonic and Strange Days with Tom Sizemore and Angela Bassett. A lot of Cyberpunk End of the world flicks near the end of the 90's.

I've always thought the Reeves "Cyber Hacking" scene from Johnny Mnemonic was really cool (graphically and cinematically speaking). The fact that Dina Meyer and Dolph (as a Cyborg Preacher Assasin) is in it as well helps a great deal.

Also the scene where Keanu does Tai Chi in the bathroom really sticks to my mind after all these years.

Actually Stone Cold is on R1 DVD.

Never seen JOHNNY MNEMONIC, but probably should for the Dolph appearance. STRANGE DAYS is awesome.

Russell: Great deal on BREAKDOWN. That's one tense flick!

Yeah, my sentence didn't make too much sense there. It's getting late in the day.

I meant to say that we saw a similar hold-up with STONE COLD. I proudly picked up a copy of that one of the first day. I would expect to be shunned from this thread if I didn't.

When you first saw STRANGE DAYS did you guess that Tom Sizemore was the killer at the end?

Never seen MNEMONIC either, but I did mock the pinball machine of it in... the pinball machine thread.

I had a long running argument with a friend about whether this was Keanu or not. I was adamant it wasn't him. Not sure what I was thinking.

I think I actually started to figure it out just before the turn Felix, but I can't remember because it was quite a few years ago.

I was hoping STONE COLD'S release last year would open the floodgates for more long overdue gems. No dice. Stuff like I COME IN PEACE, PERFECT WEAPON, SIEGE AT FIREBASE GLORIA, THE CHALLENGE, and MISSION OF JUSTICE remain stuck in limbo. Wish I could do something about that, but I'm powerless.

MNEMONIC is only good for Lundgren's scenes. Rest of the film is about as bad as the rest of the cyber-junk that was released in the 90's. STRANGE DAYS was a little better, but even that film was pretty flawed.

Never heard of MISSION OF JUSTICE before, but a quick look at the box cover and a fight scene from YouTube has me waiting for this one too.

What about THE NET and HACKERS, Molt?
I only remember HACKERS because it was the first time I saw a teenage Angelina Jolie. As for Sandra Bullock I dislike most of her films with the exception of SPEED of course.

I kinda liked STRANGE DAYS myself. Good performances all around.

THE NET is a steaming pile.

In my humble, of course.

Please God answer my prayers and make this into a live action movie!

THIS NOVEMBER
EVERYTHING
IS ON THE LINE

I know it was discussed earlier, but I just saw Paparazzi. What the hell was up with that?

I mean, it's not very good, but there's something awesome about this movie having Vince Vaughn, Daniel Baldwin, Dennis Farina, and Cole Hauser. And he just gets away with it? And they make the paparazzi such total villains that it's okay that Bo Laramie just snaps and offs them.

I just wonder what Hollywood actors, assuming they've even seen it, think about it. Wish fulfillment?

You think he's gonna kill the paparazzi at the very last scene... but no... he's OK! Bo has changed!

I saw PAPARAZZI late one night after some heavy drinking so I don't remember much about it, except the fact that I think I watched the whole damn thing. I'll definitely have to watch it again, because it seems to get some good buzz around these parts.

From all the bile directed at PAPARAZZI in this thread, it's hard to believe it comes from the same director as this and this.

Speaking of pizza, it also had Chris Rock.

Abascal was also the hair stylist for JUDGE DREDD

Sweet. Doubt any of 50's films will be that good. Though I am excited about his pairing with Val Kilmer in STREETS OF BLOOD. Co-starring Michael Biehn!

Never saw THE NET but HACKERS was lame. All those mid-90's computer flicks were bad, but at least MNEMONIC and VIRTUOSITY had fun villains. I guess Fisher Stevens in HACKERS is some kind of God for tech-heads, but not to me. No sir.

Wincott? Tony Burton? Mattias Hues? It's a classic alright. It even has a pretty sweet chick fight involving Wincott's butch looking partner:

Sorry, it's not in English.

Thanks to youtube member "femalewrestlingfan" for uploading that clip. Looks like "femalewrestlingfan" has all sorts of classy videos detailing women beating the estrogen out of each other.

Garth Ennis is writing a new Die Hard-esque comic miniseries: "Back to Brooklyn"
http://www.newsarama.com/comics/0807...oBrooklyn.html

Every studio in Hollywood should have been fighting over the rights to 50 CENT: BLOOD ON THE SAND after the plot was unveiled.

The game will probably be crappy but I would definitely see that if it were a movie.

Agreed. It's technically a sequel to a game called 50 Cent: Bulletproof, which most people say is God-awful and is hardly as batshit insane as Blood on the Sand appears to be.

I'd like to thank everyone who talked about the chain of stores known as Big Lots; believe it or not, before today I had never been in one. Don't ask me why I never decided to venture into one. I had free time tonight so I did some other things, and I happened to pass by a pair of Big Lots stores, so I went into both. In the first one I bought a package of 3 pens and some energy drinks. Holy shit is their selection of energy drinks great. I found some stuff I had been wanting to try for awhile now, but hadn't found... until I went in there. All of them being like 60 cents each... fuck yeah!

The second store I went in... that's where it ties into this thread. Their DVD selection there was much better. There was a pile of MGM DVD's and another pile of the other DVD's. In the latter I found the recently discussed Breakout. I hadn't even heard of it before this thread, but due to the good stuff said about it, I decided to add the DVD to my cart. In the MGM pile I got the 2003 DVD release of To Live and Die in L.A. I got that too. Note that the two DVD's were THREE DOLLARS each. That's a tremendous deal. The car chase in L.A. is worth more than three dollars on its own.

This doesn't have much to do with this thread but I'll tell it anyway. As I was looking for DVD's in the second store, the lone cashier working there started chatting with me out of the blue, and claimed that me and him looked exactly alike! I didn't really think so, but when he assumed that I was a computer geek like he was (when he started talking about graphical user interfaces, I was lost), I started to get a little frightened. Thankfully he went away to deal with other customers. When I went and checked out, he was still stunned that I wasn't a computer nerd (gee, thanx, buddy), then he started saying-in so many words, without being this blunt-that he was turned on by computer chips, then stated (and this IS almost a verbatim quote) that to him, building a computer is akin to giving birth to a child!

Never was I so happy to leave a store in my entire life.

Right after that quote the checkout process was completed; I gave a nervous laugh, then I tried my best not to literally run out of the store and into my car. I mean, yikes.

There were several other DVD's there I could have picked up but maybe I will at a later date-hopefully without Mr. Gives Birth To Computers there. They had a British made Western (!) starring Sean Connery (!!) called Shalako, and the original 1970 Ned Kelly, starring Mick Jagger*. I imagine both are filled with unintentional laughs (the latter movie, I know Jagger has a beard that makes him look like he churns butter for a living) so maybe I should buy both for that reason. Has anyone seen either... or for that matter, another movie that randomly has Jagger in it, Freejack.

* Looking at Jagger's IMDb page, I stumbled across a bizarre-sounding movie called Running Out of Luck. The plot synopsis being "A rock singer goes to Brazil to shoot a video, but winds up getting kidnapped and turned over to the oversexed owner of a banana plantation." is great enough, but hearing that it co-stars Rae Dawn Chong, Dennis Hopper and Jim Broadbent is even better. The gravy is seeing this sentence from an IMDb user: "Casino, banana plantation, Rae Dawn Chong wearing a HUGE brimmed hat & seducing a prison/jail guard with her luscious breasts, only to have him pass out after suckling her drug-laced nipples." Reading that, I so want to see this now and if I ever do...

I have never been to a Big Lots but it sounds like I should. Usually what I do for cheap movies is go to a used records store, one that has used VHS tapes. They usually will have them for a dollar each. You can find some pretty old/obscure movies. There was this one action flick I bought, WAR BUS COMMANDO, that looked so promising, but the tape was so old (from the packaging you could tell, rubber banded together), it wouldn't play.

Thankfully, Prince is around to produce confusing Middle East-set action vanity movies. His was called 3 CHAINS O GOLD, and I've never seen it, but I understand that it has action/terrorist elements, and that Prince uses a golden microphone/gun to shoot lightning at enemies.

The plot:

In celebration of the imminent release of the ULTRA DARK and PG-13 BOUNDARY PUSHING "The Dark Knight" I have released my latest youtube video, based on the only scene from "Batman Begins" I really cared about:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rtJIxizQi1c

That Chase totally blows it's load at the beginning.
Batman goes out of his way to run over a cop car and destroy the lives and families of two heroic police officers.

There's a shot after he completely crushes that car where it shows the two cops in the same car that was just destroyed saying DID YOU JUST SEE THAT or some shit like that. They had to have added that in after a test audience disapproved. LOOK AT IT CRUSH THE COP CAR. They are dead.

I'm pretty sure that was in the film from cut one. Because BATMAN BEGINS is possibly the most technically incompetent big-budget movie I've seen in my life.

BUT THIS NEW ONE IS SURELY THE GODFATHER 2 OF THIS MILLENNIUM.

Batman Begins had the fat slob from Vampires who gets split in half. In Batman Begins, he plays... a fat slob. Who gets yanked up and down by Batman! WHOOAAAAAA I'm goin' up and I'm goin' down this is CRAZY!!!! Batman is nuts! Jesus somebody stop this guy he's crazy! Batman's voice sounds like he always has barf in his throat!

Looking forward for THE DARK KNIGHT to change the way I think about life and the great art form that I call film

Just kidding the only Batman that will ever matter is the 1966 movie.

ThaT fat slob is awful. I remember there being a scene of him holding a teddy bear which is so poorly edited it's unbelievable. You'd think a guy holding a teddy bear would be relatively easy to film, but noooo.

Anyway, what am I thinking?
AN OSCAR FOR HEATH HE CHILLS THE BONE
THE SPOOKIEST MOVIE SINCE PAN'S LABYRINTH IT IS FOR ADULTS

His nasally high pitched dork voice truly brings me to a realm of PURE TERROR and PAHTOS!!!

PATHOS! I MEAN!

I have not been rocked in my seat by a horrific performance not since Jim Varney in ERNEST SCARED STUPID!! Leave the kids home for this one lemme tell ya! Its not your mommy and daddy's Batman!

I agree, I have not cried so hard at a performance since Hugh Jackman in THE FOUNTAIN.

A MODERN MASTERPIECE RIGHT UP THERE WITH DARK KNIGHT AND WALL-E
BOO HISS INDY 4 WHAT A DISGRACE A FRIDGE? GET A GRIP SPIELBERG

The Fountain was appalling, both in terms of the actual movie, and the people of the internet sucking its pretentious weener!

Now JUNO ohhhh my God what a brilliant masterpiece it made me cry harder than the end of T2 when he goes into the lava and gives the thumbs-up

GOODBYE, CHON

My top 5

5. Tim Borton's THe NIghtmare Before Christmas
4. Pan's Labyrinth
3. The Big Laboski
2. Reservoir Dogs
1. Hellboy 2 ( haven't seen it yet I just know its gonna be awesome)

Don't forget Eternal Sunshine, a real meditation on love.

A beautiful medley on what it means to live, and to love too. Now have this picture I drew of Al Pacino in a bunny rabbit costume.

The floor goes through his legs, that's an amateur grade-1 rookie mistake. Your art is nowhere near as good as PAN'S LABYRINTH, or as I like to call it, PAN'S.

You can bitch me out all you like, but I'm trying god dammit! One day I will reach the creative quality and levels of Guillarmo Del Taco or as I call him, GDT.

Let me say I have NO idea what in the hell is being discussed in the last 10 or 12 posts of this thread. You two might as well be speaking Klingon here.

I'm completely baffled, although I DO agree with the bashing of artsy-fartsy films like The Fountain. Hell, I can't say that I'm a Christopher Nolan fan at all. I thought Memento was a crap film that had an interesting gimmick but a bad denouement, The Prestige was a "who gives a shit anyway?" movie that-again-had a bad denouement... no wait, HORRIBLE is a better term to use here, and the rest I can take or leave, even Batman Begins. I hope saying that doesn't spark huge outrage, as for whatever reason, most people online seem to lose their fucking minds whenever the topic turns to Batman the character. All rules and manners go out the window, and carnage spreads across the forum. I shudder to think what it'll be like come the 18th. That said, I'll still see The Dark Knight, as at least here you probably don't have to deal with too much backstory and it looks more entertaining, to me anyway.

I really thought you were kidding about 3 Chains o' Gold, Paul, but amazingly, you were dead serious.

After a couple of hours of HACKING, I think I've CRACKED Gruber and McCartney's sophisticated code language!
Sit down for this one, because it appears they're making fun of the dark knight, pan's labryinth and the fountain!

Might as well have been speakin' Navajo codetalkers!

Well, I thought MEMENTO was a good film. I don't know whether to call it as a Masterpiece or anything. But I have to admit it had a fresh concept and it was well executed.

Seeing that The Dark Knight is coming up, I like to say theres one little thing about Batman Begins that still sticks in my mind.

Didn't you guys think that Bruce's training time to become Batman was a little short? I means he was at Ra's mountain for about...a year? Seems a little inadequate. The Batman from the comics studied from a variety of Masters and picked up as many varieties of disciplines that could help him.

The Christian Bale Batman seems insufficently trained to me.

I'm gonna adjust by monocle, while taking a few puffs from my tobacco pipe, and say that I liked THE FOUNTAIN. Though I do wish there was more of Jackman in his conquistador outfit. He was so precious in that getup.

To be honest, I haven't even seen it. But parodying CHUD is always good for a quick adrenaline rush.

By the way, SPIDER-MAN 2 is the greatest superhero movie of all time, it's like Raimi unleashed at last, Alfred Molina is the definitive Doc Ock!

P.S. Jesse James P.P.S. Pan's Labyrinth
P.P.P.S. Cloverfield, hipsters

I love the Spider Man movies, what I look for most in a superhero movie is if the superhero looks like a giant CGI blur when he swings around and Spider Man delivered on all three counts!

CONQUISTADOR JACKMAN!

CONQUISTADOR JACKM-
*falls asleep*

By the way, SPIDER-MAN 2 is a masterpiece and SPIDER-MAN 3 is a real turd! With little regard for the fact that they're exactly the same fucking movie! Just wanted you to know the consensus.