Be a part of the community.
It's free, join today!
I didn't really like SIN CITY, except for Mickey and the girls, of course, but oddly I'm kinda looking forward to seeing Rodriguez returning for a sequel.
Tonite: Nothin' fancy, I've got Wahlberg's CONTRABAND
Today's B-Action Movie on YouTube: John Flynn's RAW DEAL (1986). It might not be the best Schwarzenegger film ever made but it's got a solid place in my heart. I mean, this is "Arnold versus the Chicago Mob" we're talking about here. That's a movie! And when you add bonuses like Arnold as a small town sheriff, Arnold smashing a building with a tow truck, Arnold with his hair slicked back being romantic and Arnold blowing everybody away while The Rolling Stones play on the soundtrack you have a fun shaggy dog of a flick that doesn't overdo itself but just happily aims to please... From the director of THE DOGS OF WAR, NEXT OF KIN and HAMBURGER HILL and co-starring old b-movie friends Robert Davi, Kathryn Harrold, Joe Regalbuto, Victor Argo, Sam Wanamaker and Darrin McGavin. A classic 80's synth score by "Cinescore" (featuring Chris Boardman who recorded the PAYBACK score), some great action cinematography and the wackiest use of jelly beans I've ever seen in a movie. And never forget, kids... "You should not drink and bake." :D
And call me crazy, but I would so love a sequel-to or remake-of this. Even now. "Schwarzenegger versus the Chicago Mob: 2012," with today's budgets and action choreography, could still be a lot of fun in the right hands. But then again, I still want more COBRAs, more COMMANDOs and one last BEVERLY HILLS COP. So don't go by me. :)
Get ready for some Dolphage! Here's the STASH HOUSE trailer and final poster!
Oh and TOAL RECALL (1990 of course) is getting a new Blu-ray release with a new transfer
Not looking too hot . Hopefully Lundgren's scenery swallowing will be enough to save it.
Cool to hear about a new TOTAL RECALL Blu. Haven't seen the current Blu but I've always been led to believe it's atrocious.
The trailer had an amateurish look to it. Like it's a student project. Like Molt, I hope Dolph can save it with being a great arch villain.
I think it would have hilarious if Rodriguez had reported back that Rourke had told him to go play with himself while they were having lunch and discussing the Sin City sequel.
Right now I'm watching Alien3: The Extended Cut. My favorite Alien film after the first. Charles Dutton brings the finest acting of the franchise, and David Fincher made a great film despite all the studio tampering.
After reading the novelization, I am happy to report back that it basically reads as the extended cut of the film, with one scene towards the end that I didn't really care for, that was also in the Dark Horse Comics adaptation.
When Ripley and Dillon are about to climb up from the lead chamber, Dillon decides to stay and fight the Alien to keep it there. In the book and the comic book adaptation, Dillon makes it out of the lead chamber and when Ripley asks him to go through with it and kill her, he begins to cry and tells her that he can't do it. The Alien then jumps out of the lead and pulls him down.
Needless to say, I prefer Dillon going out like a badass.
Got Riot in the mail along with Dumb And Dumber (the theatrical cut), and A Cry In The Wild. A wilderness movie starring Jared Rushton and Ned Beatty. I saw that movie way back in school as a kid, and figured I'd give it another look.
Now if only they could mass produce a dvd of both Mouse And The Motorcycle films, I'd be happy.
The trailer had an amateurish look to it. Like it's a student project. Like Molt, I hope Dolph can save it with being a great arch villain.
I think it would have hilarious if Rodriguez had reported back that Rourke had told him to go play with himself while they were having lunch and discussing the Sin City sequel.
Right now I'm watching Alien3: The Extended Cut. My favorite Alien film after the first. Charles Dutton brings the finest acting of the franchise, and David Fincher made a great film despite all the studio tampering.
After reading the novelization, I am happy to report back that it basically reads as the extended cut of the film, with one scene towards the end that I didn't really care for, that was also in the Dark Horse Comics adaptation.
When Ripley and Dillon are about to climb up from the lead chamber, Dillon decides to stay and fight the Alien to keep it there. In the book and the comic book adaptation, Dillon makes it out of the lead chamber and when Ripley asks him to go through with it and kill her, he begins to cry and tells her that he can't do it. The Alien then jumps out of the lead and pulls him down.
Needless to say, I prefer Dillon going out like a badass.
Got Riot in the mail along with Dumb And Dumber (the theatrical cut), and A Cry In The Wild. A wilderness movie starring Jared Rushton and Ned Beatty. I saw that movie way back in school as a kid, and figured I'd give it another look.
Now if only they could mass produce a dvd of both Mouse And The Motorcycle films, I'd be happy.
Rene, no love for ALIENS???!?!?!?!?!?!
ALIEN 3 is definitely misunderstood, but its mostly just plain bad. A lot of half baked ideas. I will grant studio interference only so much. I feel like we have gone back with a rosy colored retrospectoscope when looking at ALIEN 3 today given what Fincher has done since.
If you look at it objectively, its just not good. A lot of great ideas but just not good.
Plus, you don't kill Michael Biehn off screen...thats like the 11th commandment.
Which RIOT did you get, Eko? The Jim Brown/Gene Hackman flick?
I don't get the revisionist appreciation for ALIEN 3. Such a dour and unpleasant film. I hate it.
http://io9.com/5903272/arnold-schwarzneggers-next-project-should-be-a-sequel-to-all-his-old-movies
A long, but pretty entertaining love letter to Arnold.
This was a favorite quote of mine from the piece:
"All of my movies after Last Action Hero contain an element of winking at the camera, and I never stopped breaking the fourth wall. With my fists!"
Yeah, if he does a movie like this, I hope it will allow him to not appear in so much dreck, like I'm in Love with a Church Girl, starring JA RULE, and the animated Egill: The Last Pagan.
-Most of the movie takes place in El Pueblito, a ratty Mexican prison that's either a small town or a super sized tenement. They have their own taco stands, heroin shacks and even, apparently, a pro wrestling league! It's a cool place to set an action movie.
-At one point, one bizarre plot detour finds Mel having to impersonate Clint Eastwood on the phone. It's eerily accurate.
Suddenly I now want to see the film. A "ratty Mexican prison" that features Lucha Libre wrestling... tremendous.
Get ready for some Dolphage! Here's the STASH HOUSE trailer and final poster!
While, I'm not sure about this film. Although of course I still want to see it. There may be unintentional laughs. The secret stash being found after the lead couple do some literal wall-banging... awesome. So is Briana Evigan being wet (in the rain, I mean!) and being shirtless. I hope to enjoy the movie that has two stars that give me a Potato in my Pants, for entirely different reasons of course.
Today's B-Action Movie on YouTube: John Flynn's RAW DEAL (1986).
Ha. When the movie has been brought up before there's definitely been a mixed reaction. I haven't seen it yet but one of these years I will. I know there are some rather goofy moments that I can laugh at, if nothing else.
Yeah, it's not too great. There is a LOT of room for improvement.
http://io9.com/5903272/arnold-schwarzneggers-next-project-should-be-a-sequel-to-all-his-old-movies
A long, but pretty entertaining love letter to Arnold.
This was a favorite quote of mine from the piece:
"All of my movies after Last Action Hero contain an element of winking at the camera, and I never stopped breaking the fourth wall. With my fists!"
Yes, that sounds like something he would say.
To continue with the Arnold theme, I came across a TREMENDOUS find online late last night. I first found out about it on Spotify, the client you download to listen to who knows how many millions of songs. Yes, it is a workout album where Arnold tells you various exercises, and he voices it over various 80's songs, both famous and not so famous.
If it's not hilarious enough that he talks over Don't Stop Believin', he also talks over Burnin' For You, Eddie Money's I Think I'm In Love, 867-5309 and most amazing to me, the disco gay anthem It's Raining Men! I swear this is true. Unfortunately only a few of the tracks are on YouTube and none of them are raining men.
I got the Riot that has Gary Daniels after it was mentioned here a couple of weeks ago.
I like Aliens well enough, but I've always had a fondness for Alien3, even back when I was a kid when my Mother bought me the vhs tape, and I had no idea who Fincher was. Then the appreciation grew further when I finally got to see the extended cut. I'm not saying I hate Aliens, that's ridiculous, I'm just saying I like Alien3 more. I mean this is not the first time I've preferred a 3rd film over the second one that I used to love a lot. In recent years I've come to love Romero's Day Of The Dead more than Dawn Of The Dead. Insane I know, but it's me.
Call me crazy, but I prefer RAW DEAL to COMMANDO.
You are crazy!
I like Raw Deal a whole lot, but it's BENNETT! Nothing in Raw Deal, can compare to BENNETT.
Just started up Riot. I was between that and revisiting Dumb And Dumber, but that one seems more like something I should save for the weekend.
Madsen deserves any break he gets. The guy's just so good when he works with the right people. Also, has anyone out there read his poetry? It's very hard livin', cheap hotelin', bottle hittin' stuff by way of Kerouac meets Bukowski... and often quite soft, mellow and surprising. "I actually like his stuff more than Kerouac." -- Dennis Hopper. He's also a pretty good photographer.
http://www.amazon.com/Complete-Poetic-Works-Michael-Madsen/dp/0976726009
To continue with the Arnold theme, I came across a TREMENDOUS find online late last night. I first found out about it on Spotify, the client you download to listen to who knows how many millions of songs. Yes, it is a workout album where Arnold tells you various exercises, and he voices it over various 80's songs, both famous and not so famous.
If it's not hilarious enough that he talks over Don't Stop Believin', he also talks over Burnin' For You, Eddie Money's I Think I'm In Love, 867-5309 and most amazing to me, the disco gay anthem It's Raining Men! I swear this is true. Unfortunately only a few of the tracks are on YouTube and none of them are raining men.
This immediately went on my Facebook...a truly amazing find.
Where did you come across this? thearnoldfans?
Get ready for some Dolphage! Here's the STASH HOUSE trailer and final poster!
Oh and TOAL RECALL (1990 of course) is getting a new Blu-ray release with a new transfer
I am WAY interested to see Dolph do this. He seems more in control as a bad guy than I'm used to, but I want to see what he does with it. Dolph has a lot of talent in him and I'd like to see him branch out more.
Also, great news on that Total Recall bluray.
Cool to hear about a new TOTAL RECALL Blu. Haven't seen the current Blu but I've always been led to believe it's atrocious.
Oh, believe it. That one and Highlander are my least favorite blus that I've come across. My dvd looked better.
To continue with the Arnold theme, I came across a TREMENDOUS find online late last night. I first found out about it on Spotify, the client you download to listen to who knows how many millions of songs. Yes, it is a workout album where Arnold tells you various exercises, and he voices it over various 80's songs, both famous and not so famous.
If it's not hilarious enough that he talks over Don't Stop Believin', he also talks over Burnin' For You, Eddie Money's I Think I'm In Love, 867-5309 and most amazing to me, the disco gay anthem It's Raining Men! I swear this is true. Unfortunately only a few of the tracks are on YouTube and none of them are raining men.
I've actually listened to the whole thing and worked out to it. Well, I did as much as I could, but it's too funny to get anything done to. There's actually a very funny story behind the recording sessions, but I digress. The thing is worth finding.
I got the Riot that has Gary Daniels after it was mentioned here a couple of weeks ago.
I enjoyed that one quite a bit. I think it's the weakest of the Gary Daniels R Trilogy, but it's still one his best films.
Tonight I finally got around to seeing Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol and I really liked it. I'm not a huge fan of the series (never even seen the third one all the way through) but I'm down for a fifth film if they let Brad Bird direct it. There's a lot of good action, the team dynamic was interesting and at times very funny, and what can you say about that Dubai hotel sequence? Amazing. I would like to have seen that part in IMAX. I will say it was a bit weird seeing the footage of the Kremlin being blown up considering this is the 17th anniversary of the OKC bombing though. I just chose to watch it on the wrong date I guess.
As far as Raw Deal goes, I'm on record as a fan. As I and others have pointed out, it's kind of Arnold's poliziotteschi.
If anyone has Epix OnDemand, they have Leviathan in HD this month!
Oh, you mean George Dillon. I say that as believe it or not when some people saw the picture of Kony, they thought like he resembled Carl Weathers from Predator!
Where did you come across this? thearnoldfans?
To be honest, I was using Spotify as I have an account with them and I have their client downloaded. If you don't know it's a music streaming service but their big deal is that they have almost all the popular artists on it and a shitload of less popular ones. There are literally millions of songs to listen to. I was looking up Journey on there (hey, don't laugh) and it was listed on their profile that they had a song on that album, which much to my surprise was on Spotify.
The trailer had an amateurish look to it. Like it's a student project. Like Molt, I hope Dolph can save it with being a great arch villain.
I hope I'm right that the trailer isn't representative of the quality of the film which seems much better than the trailer is. All the After Dark Action trailers have been terrible and it's obvious the footage and few dialogs they choose to include here are not the best or most interesting. It looks good in terms of cinematography and atmosphere, I think it's should be fun. And it's a Dolph flick that actually has an official theatrical release in the US so go guys if you're in the areas it's playing...
Sly and 50 Cent on THE TOMB set.
Alien 3 has grown on me over the years. It's well acted and has some great dialogue scenes. But compared to ALIENS, its not even a close match in terms of excitement or fun.
Fat Elvis, I won't call you...Crazy, but I will take Commando over...any other Schwarzenegger Film!
Hey, we're all friends here! Let's all leddoff some steem and bask in the glory of vintage Arnold. :)
This looks like it could be fun:
Just watched DEATH RACE. Confirms my belief cameras and Paul W.S. Anderson do not mix.
Sly and 50 Cent on THE TOMB set.
Is that Amy Ryan from THE WIRE? Great cast continue to grow (minus 50 CENT).
IMDB confirms Amy Ryan is in this flick. I have really high hopes for this thing
Anybody see that Nicki Minaj video with Michael Jai White? Surprised no one's mentioned it in this thread. Not a great tune, but it does name-drop John McClane as being some sort of ideal man.
Also, I've been having some weird dreams lately, and last night I dreamt I started a website called Grandmas Who Look Like Billy Drago.
I don't know why I am sharing this.
I don't consider ALIEN & ALIENS dour and unpleasant. There's a dark mood in the original, for sure. But in both cases excitement and horror rope in the viewer, and most importantly, you care about the characters. With ALIEN 3 you're stuck with a heavy-handed AIDS metaphor (the tone is overpowering), and you can't even tell who anybody is.
I don't consider ALIEN & ALIENS dour and unpleasant. There's a dark mood in the original, for sure. But in both cases excitement and horror rope in the viewer, and most importantly, you care about the characters. With ALIEN 3 you're stuck with a heavy-handed AIDS metaphor (the tone is overpowering), and you can't even tell who anybody is.
Agreed. its not a good film.
Maybe it's just me, but I always kinda liked Alien 3. It moved away from the gung-ho Cameron vision into a more thoughtful thing. A bit muddled perhaps, but beautiful to look at.
And I'd love to see an fifth picture, with Ripley as the genetic messiah of the dying alien race. But no Winona Ryder. Please
I hate to admit this, but i found COMMANDO pretty silly when i re-watched it recently. It's almost like a Live action McBain movie.
Don't get me wrong, there're a lot of stuff i like in it.
Arnold's first appearance with that huge log. The Calypso soundtrack and One-liners. But i can't really accept it as a straight-up action flick anymore.
But i am still rooting for Arnold's return to the Big Screen. The guy has a lot of charm and he hasn't changed much when he saw him in his TE cameo 2 years back.
This looks like it could be fun:
Trailer comes off like another SMOKIN' ACES DTV sequel. Sort of feels like Billy Bob shot all his stuff in the same location over a weekend. Will keep an eye out for it though.
Felix, of course Commando is live action McBain. As he would say himself, "That's the joke."
Originally Posted by Fat Elvis
Tonite: Nothin' fancy, I've got Wahlberg's CONTRABAND
Spoiler alert: it sucks. Kate Beckinsale sure has it tough becuase I hated this and Underworld: Awakening (never again).
I don't get the revisionist appreciation for ALIEN 3. Such a dour and unpleasant film. I hate it.
I have to revisit it, in all honesty, but at this rate I prefer Alien Resurrection. There, I said it. Meanwhile...
Just watched DEATH RACE. Confirms my belief cameras and Paul W.S. Anderson do not mix.
I enjoy the holy hell out of it.
[Rene]IT HAS AN 18 WHEELER WITH A TANK BUILT ONTO THE BACK OF IT![/Rene]
And any amount of Ian McShane never hurts.
Is that Amy Ryan from THE WIRE? Great cast continue to grow (minus 50 CENT).
Yeah, I'm loving that Beadie Russell is in it. I've crushed on her since Gone Baby Gone.
I don't have time for a full review, but the other night I discovered Cannon's theatrical swan song, American Cyborg: Steel Warrior, a movie so nice, they named it twice. A few boring patches aside, a master class in unintentional comedy. Anything superhuman that walks through an electric fence or a brick wall like the Kool-Aid Man is NEVER not funny.
The Mimic Series Blu Ray Box Set
All 3 films. And they've got the Director's Cut. I really wouldn't mind spending money on this.
Haven't seen Mimic: Sentinel though.
Weighing in...
ALIEN: Perfect suspense horror.
ALIENS: Perfect suspense action.
ALIEN 3: Some big mistakes, but decent performances. I prefer the DVD box set extended-cut to the theatrical.
ALIEN RESURRECTION: Also some big mistakes but it's b-movie comic book fun. Love Sigourney, but I wish the film were smarter.
One thing that bugs me about the series is all the time jumps. I read that ALIEN takes place in the year 2115. I can buy that. It would probably take that much time to get us into space so often that we'd have regular freight routes like the Nostromo might use. Then ALIEN jumps 57 years to 2172 and that's fine since 57 seems plausible enough for Ripley to have been floating around out there (her daughter and friends back home have passed on, she's sleeping beauty). ALIENS leaves her, Newt and Hicks in cryostasis again until ALIEN 3 picks up when? I can't find a year for ALIEN 3, though I feel that it's meant to take place immediately after ALIENS. So, timewise, ALIENS and ALIEN 3 are pretty much one long movie, is that right? And after ALIEN 3 comes to a close, we jump 200 years ahead, presumably to 2372.
And all that's changed in 250 years, from her basic timeline and the RESURRECTION timeline is... Cloning? Laser-melted alcohol? Sexier androids (Ryder)? Galactic freighters don't seem to have changed much, nor language, recreational sports (basketball), sexual attitudes (Perlman) or wheelchairs (Pinon). That's what always bothered me most about ALIEN 3 and ALIEN RESURRECTION: that there just wasn't enough imagination in them. Scott's "Nostromo" is both a nightmarish hanuted house in space and a giant live-in truck, basically sent out there to gather materials and transport them home to Earth, isn't it? In film, it's pretty much the first of it's particular kind (aside possibly Dark Star and maybe Silent Running). Cameron's vision of LV-246 is still unmatched to this day in it's realistic-feeling workaday portrayal of the terraforming colony and far more sprawling and even daring in its tech visions (the anime-like cargo-loaders).
ALIEN 3 and RESURRECTION feel been there done that in design and portrayal. The "wooden planet" from Vincent Ward's take on the screenplay sounded promising, though, if only intellectually (and perhaps an early spiritual sister to Aronofsky's THE FOUNTAIN). It must be daunting from a design and storytelling sense to have to come up with a cinematic future like nobody's ever seen before. THE FIFTH ELEMENT seemed a poppy, happy take on BLADE RUNNER via The Jetsons. The vision of Zion and the scorched surfaces of THE MATRIX and it's sequels got deeply earthy (literally so). Right now, the only futurist vision that comes to mind as being somewhat fresh is the one of Spielberg-and-Kubrick's A.I.: ARTIFICAL INTELLIGENCE. Love it or hate it, the combination of technology and nature (oceans, fields) paints what feels to be a future within something akin to reason, whereas Spielberg's MINORITY REPORT comes fairly close except for the auto-drive freeways and cryo-prisons.
In this way, it's interesting to me that Ridley's gone back in time a bit with PROMETHEUS. Closer to our (the audience's) present time than any of the ALIEN films, his concepts of a world between the now and the far-off imagined have me wondering just what ol' Ridley's got waiting for us. By taking the huge gap leaps through time from ALIEN 3 and RESURRECTION out of the ALIEN equation, he might be giving us something unexpected -- an imagined future we could possibly relate to. This story might not require any forward looking predictions of still-further technical times, but then again this story seems not necessarily to need them.
Mimic: Sentinel isn't that bad, but it's only 70-some odd minutes long and feels about 2 hours.
I still haven't seen the second one. I already own the Blu-ray of the first one, and own the 3rd one on dvd, so maybe I'll just get the second one on dvd, unless the details on the Blu-ray set sway me. Either that or if it's 10 bucks.
Mike's right about Death Race. THE DREADNAUGHT OWNS.
Got in Resident Evil: Operation Raccoon City in the mail today. Looking forward to playing it.
Watching Dumb And Dumber right now. Still as hilarious as I remember seeing it as a kid in the theater back in 1995.
Welcome to the thread Akutagawa!
Hey, Eko: On TCM Underground tonite: the all kinds of awesome EQUINOX. (It's very much the EVIL DEAD of the 70's) If I recall, you said you'd never seen it.
Excellent and pretty spot-on analysis of the Alien series Engineer.
I think Vincent Ward's script for Alien 3 is excellent... They should have gone ahead and made that because it would have been different. Alien 3 felt too much like a rehash of the first one. And the interesting thing is that the Ward script would have been pretty keyed in to David Fincher's sensibilities.
.......
On HT's recommendation, I watched Light Sleeper. Good noir from Paul Schrader. But it also felt too obviously a PAUL SCHRADER movie in quotes and caps. Like he was trying to make a big impression/comeback in the 90s. So, it's a little self-conscious in that respect. I like the way the movie builds to its bloodbath conclusion, very true to the Schrader formula established in Hardcore, American Gigolo and - of course - Taxi Driver.
I enjoyed seeing Victor Garber in a small but key role as a total slimebag.
felix, Commando will always be...Gloriously...Over The Top, and All Kinds Of Awesome! I watched it recently as well! Commando and True Lies are my...Top 2 Schwarzenegger Films!
akutagawa, Welcome to the...B Action Movie Thread!
Hey, Eko: On TCM Underground tonite: the all kinds of awesome EQUINOX. (It's very much the EVIL DEAD of the 70's) If I recall, you said you'd never seen it.
Thanks for the heads up, Elvis. I did rent it from Netflix back in February, and I agree that it's The Evil Dead of the 70's. Raimi had to have seen the film. There's too much that's in it to just be coincidental.
I think that the more that changes the more things stay the same. In regards to the Alien franchise, I think guns will still fire bullets even 2 centuries from now. Sure space travel will probably be available to everybody, but guns will still be guns, and basketball will still be basketball. Although there will probably be sex droids for horny guys who can't get with real women, or just horny guys who want to say they fucked a sexy robot.
Watching the Godzilla remake. Always been a fan of this one and don't get the hate. It's got my other favorite French actor next to Tcheky Karyo, Jean Reno playing an awesome French action hero, and a giant mutant lizard terrorizing New York City. Then it turns into pseudo Jurassic Park with little Godzillas, and climaxes with a cool chase.
Also got in Emauelle Around The World via Netflix's disc service, so I'll be going around the world with Emanuelle later.
Discovered earlier that Shout! Factory will be releasing the second season of DIC's G.I. Joe animated series on July 10th. That completes the original A Real American Hero run, and I'll definitely be picking it up. I don't even remember if I ever got to see any of the second season episodes, although I am familiar with villains from it such as Cesspool and The Headman who came out in the Marvel Comic.
Aw, shucks, thanks for the welcomes, guys. If I were capable of real human emotion, I'd be blushing right now.
As long as we're throwing around stuff like Cobra, how 'bout some love for The Hero and the Terror? Easily my fave Chuck opus.
Just to be clear, I'm totally not hacking on Cobra. His name's Cobretti, the movie's called Cobra... brilliant.
I've never seen HERO AND THE TERROR, but I used to like HERO AT LARGE.
Honestly, I've always felt that Hero and The Terror was among the absolute worst action films in the Golan-Globus canon (*rimshot*). When I watch an 80's Golan-Globus actioner, I expect at LEAST several of the following:
1) Copious amounts of un-PC violence.
2) Copious amounts of completely batshit paranoid Reagan-era right-wing propaganda, ham-fistedly delivered with utmost straight faced seriousness and deathly serious conviction.
3) Ninjas that are nothing at all like what actual traditional ninjas are "supposed" to be like (i.e. they fight in broad daylight with uzis and can fire laser beams from their fingertips for no real reason).
4) Lots and lots and lots and LOTS of hammer-to-the-face anti-drug propaganda paradoxically combined with enough on-screen cocaine inhaling to make the film seem almost like a marketing advert for nose candy.
5) A near total disregard for the safety of children or innocent bystanders whatsoever (again, see #1).
6) Enough palpable sleaze and crassly exploitative skeeviness to essentially make a film bearing the Cannon Group logo basically an outright extension of actual, legitimate, (and at the time just about dying-to-dead) grindhouse cinema.
and 7) Appearances from some of the coolest, most fun and badass B movie character actors of the time.
Hero and the Terror has almost NONE of the above, save for number 7, with appearances by familiar and beloved Cannon and B action staples like Steve James, Branscombe Richmond, Bob fucking Wall (yes, that Bob Wall), and my personal childhood hero Billy Drago; all of whom are COMPLETELY wasted here by the way in almost-nothing roles where they barely appear and get to do all of zilch.
What the film DOES have instead however are endless, and I mean ENDLESS torturously agonizing scenes of Chuck and his onscreen ladylove living out their Ambien-boring domestic daily routines and sappy "I wuv you; no I wuv you MORE" back and forth dialogue... I'm completely serious, this film is at least 60 to 70% bland romance and about 25% "tension building" that basically amounts to rote speculation on where the killer is and what his psychology is, and finally maybe 5% (tops) anemic "action" that is SO beneath what Norris was capable of back then it's frankly insulting.
This one's absolutely on the rock fucking bottom of Cannon Films' 80's action oeuvre. Mentioning it in even the same BREATH as fucking Cobra of all films (one of Cannon's absolute crown jewel films as well all well know) is just bad, bad form. Trust me, I LOVE these kinds of movies to pieces, to a point where they're SUCH a staple of the fabric of my DNA that they had pretty much supplanted Saturday morning cartoons for me entirely as a tot (until I discovered adult anime at least). But this one? Dogshit. Move right along. Unless you need a sleeping aid, then by all means...
Speaking of Chuck, the Eko approved Chuck-Gosset, Jr team up FIREWALKER is now available on Netflix. I absolutely hated it as a kid, but I'm now tempted to give it another viewing. I might love it for the cheese factor alone of Chuck doing Indiana Jones.
Ah yes, Firewalker, the only Indy ripoff where it's a gay romance...with Chuck Norris and Louis Gossett Jr. no less!
I'm all for Fast Six being Paul Walker and Tyrese on a quest for some kind of buttfuck artifact.
For what its worth though, I'm TOTALLY a lifelong member of the "Alien 3 is the best film in the series" cult. There aren't a LOT of us... but we're out there.
WARNING: Alien-fanboy rant incoming...
I've always loved Alien 3 especially BECAUSE its so unapologetically, unrepentantly dour and unpleasant. The whole entire POINT of the film is that its a stark, blunt, no-bullshit meditation on the nihilistic situation of a person knowingly facing the inevitable end of their life completely alone and without a real support system to help them through it. The ballsiness of it ALONE puts it over for me. Then there's the themes and story and the ideas and the setpieces and the overall direction, which are just plain phenomenal and anyone who trashes this film is someone whom I sit before completely perplexed.
I've also NEVER bought into the notion that the Alien series has somehow had this "unified" feel to them until 3 and/or Resurrection completely fucked it all up. Bullshit. Each and every individual one of these are SO far different from the other, they're basically as much self-contained works as they are a part of a connected series. Fuck, each Alien movie covers a WILDLY different damned GENRE from the other ones.
Alien is a straight up, stalk and kill by way of haunted house horror film (with disturbing sexual undertones to it and is among of the most brilliantly executed films of its kind).
Aliens is a testosterone overdosed, shoot em all action film with an infectious sense of spirited camaraderie to it as well as a whole "family unit" theme going on.
Alien 3 is, as mentioned, a complete wallowing in a total, inescapable, all consuming vortex of nihilism (which for me is not only NOT at all a bad thing, but something I could DESPERATELY use a great deal more of in today's current way-too-manchild-friendly-for-comfort cinematic landscape) and essentially a character/prison drama.
And finally (whatever one's thoughts on it) Resurrection is a breezy (for this series), space-adventure film that mixes dark humor with snappy dialogue and an over the top comic book sensibility coupled with a very sadistic mean streak and some of the most overt body horror of the whole series, making it kind of a jumbled grab-bag of some of my favorite genre trappings (this is where I hereby sacrifice ALL my chewer cred and out myself as a fan of Resurrection: blow me, it has issues definitely, but the film's WAY too off-kilter and infectiously FUN for me to hate: plus Brad Dourif, Ron Pearlman, Leland Orser, and Michael Wincott... fuck off, that cast is amazing: but that's a defense to mount for another day, and possibly another thread).
Again, I think the difference where I lie here among a lot of other Alien fans I see is that I NEVER saw these films as some kind of cohesive work, or some tightly woven together universe that need all fit a certain strict criteria of standards that were set in stone for the duration (beyond a few VERY inherent basic tenants). I mean just LOOK at the directors: Ridley Scott, James Cameron, David Fincher, and Jean-Pierre Jeunet?! What do ANY of these people have REMOTELY in common as filmmakers? Nada. The Alien franchise was ALWAYS from day one a high grade, A-list “showcase” franchise for a wildly eclectic group of contrastingly varying but all masterful and incredibly distinctive directors.
Even Prometheus, the first film in this series to have one of its past directors return to it... it looks to me at least like it too is going to be doing something COMPLETELY different with the franchise... no different than each and every individual entry that came before it.
As long as the Giger visuals are there and the tone is somehow bleakly dark and violent, but everything maintains a heavy undercurrent of prestige, class, gothic imagination, and intelligence, it pretty much is and always has been the next big visionary director's playground to do whatever strikes their fancy with the concept and the universe.
I love this franchise to pieces, each and every single entry for COMPLETELY different and wildly contrasting reasons (as they're all COMPLETELY different, and wildly contrasting films), but I feel like WAY too many of its fans treat it like its supposed to be this super continuity-heavy, “everything must flow together and feel like its all part of the same universe” Star Trekian type of sci fi series. To me its always, always, ALWAYS been ANYTHING but and seeing it in those terms just renders it... well, kinda fucking boring.
Just for the record though: no, I DON'T like or defend EITHER of the two AvP films. Those can burn in a fire, every last copy. I'm may be a moron, but I'm not a complete fucking moron.
Chuck Norris films have always been a mixed bag for me. Not that I've seen very many. Mostly latter day offerings. Liked: Missing in Action, Code of Silence, The Delta Force, Invasion U.S.A. and Silent Rage (for its complete ridiculousness). Didn't like: Missing in Action 2 or 3, Firewalker, Hero & The Terror or The Hitman. After that I gave up. I think I always liked the idea of Chuck Norris more than Chuck Norris, himself. I caught up with Firewalker about a year ago. Didn't hold up well for me at all. Not even Sonny Landham could save it. And when I learned that it was directed by the same man who gave us the original Cape Fear, I wept in my heart a little.
Just finished revisiting the extended cut of Aliens. That, however, holds up like a charm.
I need to catch up on the different versions of Alien 3. I once read the William Gibson (Neuromancer) draft but remember virtually nothing. Those interested should look around online. There are several drafts of the Alien series scripts, even those for Alien 3 by Gibson, David Twohy and Eric Red.
Chuck Norris films have always been a mixed bag for me. Not that I've seen very many. Mostly latter day offerings. Liked: Missing in Action, Code of Silence, The Delta Force, Invasion U.S.A. and Silent Rage (for its complete ridiculousness).
Those are indeed all upper echelon Norris. I'd also recommend Delta Force 2 as well. For Billy Drago's amazingly skeevy performance as drug lord Ramon Cota alone.
Invasion U.S.A. to me is the single most Golan-Globusy of all Golan-Globus movies. Never mind the inherent premise itself of a small army of communist terrorists invading our borders and driving through suburbia in trucks and humvees while blowing up YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN IN YOUR HOMES with fucking rocket launchers (complete with the moustache-twirlingly immortal line "They make it sooooo easy don't they?"). That in and of itself would qualify it.
But no, it has to also up the ante further by containing a scene in which Richard Lynch slams a metal coke straw all the way up a woman's nostril, then while she's gushing blood and shrieking in agony, sticks a gun down Billy Drago's pants and blows BOTH his testicles off (there's actually TWO shots, one for each), before finally hurling the screaming, blood drenched coke-lady out a fucking plate-glass window to her death.
In contrast to Hero and the Terror mentioned earlier... THAT above is a REAL Cannon Group film. THAT is the level of fucking commitment to both paranoid, bugfuck psychotic-raving right-wing fantasies of the Reagan-era as well as pure, coke fueled (literally) wanton ultra-violence for the sake of ultra-violence that I expect going in when I see that logo appear at the start of one of their films.
My one sole critique of the whole legendary "roll through the suburbs and blow each individual house into oblivion with missiles" sequence is that there's never a shot of one of the cute little kids (shown earlier hanging Christmas tree ornaments), staggering out of the ruined, burning wreckage of his or her home and screaming & wailing his or her death throes whilst on fire.
That may sound a just a wee bit harsh true, but fuck it: you've taken your special brand of paranoid raving and fanatical nationalistic lunacy THIS far already as it is Invasion USA. Go for fucking broke and just show us the children themselves burning alive on camera (as opposed to implied off screen) while you're at it. Make the communist scare tactics that much MORE sledgehammer aggressive. I mean seriously, you might as well. At that point, it just feels like you're holding something back as far as overzealous propaganda goes. This is sleazy exploitation for Christ's sake: "offscreen implication" is for pussies within this particular genre.
Anybody see that Nicki Minaj video with Michael Jai White? Surprised no one's mentioned it in this thread. Not a great tune, but it does name-drop John McClane as being some sort of ideal man.
Pretty sure I posted something about a long time ago around when it came out. I like Minaj, but I don't think she's really extended herself as an artist yet. And Jai White is hilarious in that video.
Before I saw the extended version, I thought the whole 57 years later bit was just some BS from her nightmare at the beginning. They never mention it in "reality".
As long as we're throwing around stuff like Cobra, how 'bout some love for The Hero and the Terror? Easily my fave Chuck opus.
No, man. There is no way to come back after letting Steve James go out like that. Love the soundtrack in that one, though.
For what its worth though, I'm TOTALLY a lifelong member of the "Alien 3 is the best film in the series" cult. There aren't a LOT of us... but we're out there.
WARNING: Alien-fanboy rant incoming...
I've always loved Alien 3 especially BECAUSE its so unapologetically, unrepentantly dour and unpleasant. The whole entire POINT of the film is that its a stark, blunt, no-bullshit meditation on the nihilistic situation of a person knowingly facing the inevitable end of their life completely alone and without a real support system to help them through it. The ballsiness of it ALONE puts it over for me. Then there's the themes and story and the ideas and the setpieces and the overall direction, which are just plain phenomenal and anyone who trashes this film is someone whom I sit before completely perplexed.
I've also NEVER bought into the notion that the Alien series has somehow had this "unified" feel to them until 3 and/or Resurrection completely fucked it all up. Bullshit. Each and every individual one of these are SO far different from the other, they're basically as much self-contained works as they are a part of a connected series. Fuck, each Alien movie covers a WILDLY different damned GENRE from the other ones.
Alien is a straight up, stalk and kill by way of haunted house horror film (with disturbing sexual undertones to it and is among of the most brilliantly executed films of its kind).
Aliens is a testosterone overdosed, shoot em all action film with an infectious sense of spirited camaraderie to it as well as a whole "family unit" theme going on.
Alien 3 is, as mentioned, a complete wallowing in a total, inescapable, all consuming vortex of nihilism (which for me is not only NOT at all a bad thing, but something I could DESPERATELY use a great deal more of in today's current way-too-manchild-friendly-for-comfort cinematic landscape) and essentially a character/prison drama.
And finally (whatever one's thoughts on it) Resurrection is a breezy (for this series), space-adventure film that mixes dark humor with snappy dialogue and an over the top comic book sensibility coupled with a very sadistic mean streak and some of the most overt body horror of the whole series, making it kind of a jumbled grab-bag of some of my favorite genre trappings (this is where I hereby sacrifice ALL my chewer cred and out myself as a fan of Resurrection: blow me, it has issues definitely, but the film's WAY too off-kilter and infectiously FUN for me to hate: plus Brad Dourif, Ron Pearlman, Leland Orser, and Michael Wincott... fuck off, that cast is amazing: but that's a defense to mount for another day, and possibly another thread).
Again, I think the difference where I lie here among a lot of other Alien fans I see is that I NEVER saw these films as some kind of cohesive work, or some tightly woven together universe that need all fit a certain strict criteria of standards that were set in stone for the duration (beyond a few VERY inherent basic tenants). I mean just LOOK at the directors: Ridley Scott, James Cameron, David Fincher, and Jean-Pierre Jeunet?! What do ANY of these people have REMOTELY in common as filmmakers? Nada. The Alien franchise was ALWAYS from day one a high grade, A-list “showcase” franchise for a wildly eclectic group of contrastingly varying but all masterful and incredibly distinctive directors.
Even Prometheus, the first film in this series to have one of its past directors return to it... it looks to me at least like it too is going to be doing something COMPLETELY different with the franchise... no different than each and every individual entry that came before it.
As long as the Giger visuals are there and the tone is somehow bleakly dark and violent, but everything maintains a heavy undercurrent of prestige, class, gothic imagination, and intelligence, it pretty much is and always has been the next big visionary director's playground to do whatever strikes their fancy with the concept and the universe.
I love this franchise to pieces, each and every single entry for COMPLETELY different and wildly contrasting reasons (as they're all COMPLETELY different, and wildly contrasting films), but I feel like WAY too many of its fans treat it like its supposed to be this super continuity-heavy, “everything must flow together and feel like its all part of the same universe” Star Trekian type of sci fi series. To me its always, always, ALWAYS been ANYTHING but and seeing it in those terms just renders it... well, kinda fucking boring.
Just for the record though: no, I DON'T like or defend EITHER of the two AvP films. Those can burn in a fire, every last copy. I'm may be a moron, but I'm not a complete fucking moron.
First off, I would like to say that I generally concur with your statements. I like each of these films in their own way myself. And I know what you're saying for the most part (even if I still don't like what they did with Alien 3), but I have to say that your synopsis of Aliens is a slight misreading of the film. It's not about testosterone at all, really. Aliens turns the Action movie conventions around by revealing the facade of masculinity as a sad and empty one. Strength is not found in numbers, advanced weaponry, or in any of the machismo shown off so brazenly by the space marines. It is in the love and commitment of motherhood/family.
As for how I really feel about Alien 3, I think it's a grand-scale and (when I'm in the mood) fitting end a character who's battled these beats across the reaches of space. It's dark, but it has power. But as a sequel to Aliens, I have to be angry. The family unit so well structured by the finale of Aliens is offhandedly destroyed offscreen and in a ferociously nasty manner that I can only scowl about just thinking of it. It's shitty, and the way they tear open the little girl for the autopsy is awful as well. Makes it worse. I think the movie has value as film (and a good one at that), but it will always be tainted by being a bad sequel. ...If those contradictory opinions can make sense.
Didn't like: Missing in Action 2 or 3, Firewalker, Hero & The Terror or The Hitman. After that I gave up.
The Hitman is actually pretty good, not counting the subplot with the young kid Chuck decides to help out. Also pretty good? Those Missing In Action movies. The Beginning might just have Chuck's best acting to date (possibly because the Vietnam thing hit so close to home for him) and while Braddock may completely fuck up the whole timeline, it is easily the most fun of the series. And Chuck's gun fucking rocks.
Just saw Lockout, fellas. Didn't hate it.
The action itself is nothing to write home about. But i love the Guy Pearce & Maggie Grace chemistry in this one. A review i read described it as "Han Solo/Princess Leia" like and i think it fits.
Wouldn't mind seeing more Snow Adventures. But looking at the Box Office that may not be likely.
