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Deadly Poison

post #1 of 14
2/9/06 at 10:08pm
Thread Starter 
Deadly Poison

your the vampire standing behind me
waiting for the moment to strike & send
your poison into me from that one deadly
strike from your teeth sinking into my neck
as U drain me of my blood , I stand there
unable to move unable to breath nor think
in your presence I try to free myself but I fail
I can't move I am frozen as U drink from
my precious skin of the warm blood trickling
down the back of my neck ,while U hold me
and keep drinking not caring that U may end
up kill me during your lustfull attack to drink
the one thing U crave ,which is me and my blood

your the poison within killing me by each second
can't you see that your killing me by every move
you make I am already dead now that you drank
the last drop of my blood I lay lifeless in your hands
your crying when you realized you killed me
your the poison attacking me for the lust you linger
for which is me and my blood the taste I bear
you linger for ,which in the end killed me

you never wanted that but it happened
anyway I am dead ,dead on the inside
you were a secret vampire taking my
dead soul and bringing it alive but then
let go and dropped the precious glass jar
that held my soul and U dropped it and it broke
killing my soul making me dead

how I linger to be alive again
to feel the warmth of joy
and the warmth of love
and the warmth of anything good
but that won't happen...
since the last drop of me was drank
and my soul shattered

by,Bec
(i wrote this after my b/f broke up with me )
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post #2 of 14
2/10/06 at 12:54am
But some gut feeling tells me this isn't much different than the poetry you wrote before he broke up with you.

Call it a hunch.
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post #3 of 14
2/10/06 at 1:52am
If you thought his the vampire standing behind me was impressive, you oughta see my the vampire standing behind me!
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post #4 of 14
2/10/06 at 2:46am
Thread Starter 
i always write dark poems
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post #5 of 14
2/10/06 at 9:19am
These poems dont rhyme?
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post #6 of 14
2/10/06 at 10:47am
No iambic pentameter either. That's just lazy. Do you happen to be into self-harm by any chance?
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post #7 of 14
2/10/06 at 11:01am
If you havent you should try it.
It only makes the poetry feel more real.
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post #8 of 14
2/10/06 at 11:03am
I'd recommend finding a website with less assholes.
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post #9 of 14
2/10/06 at 4:58pm
Or, you know, maybe a site vaguely compatible with her interests.
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post #10 of 14
2/10/06 at 5:06pm
That was more a grim warning than an indictment of CHUD.
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post #11 of 14
2/10/06 at 8:50pm
Thread Starter 
*laughs*
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post #12 of 14
2/10/06 at 11:46pm
Twilight Vampire, I have a question about your writing style; do you intentionally use U instead of YOU or is it simply a product of your upbringing; namely your 13 year old mother of twelve teaching you English the only way she knew how, via text messaging.
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post #13 of 14
2/11/06 at 5:56am
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Kraken
Twilight Vampire, I have a question about your writing style; do you intentionally use U instead of YOU or is it simply a product of your upbringing; namely your 13 year old mother of twelve teaching you English the only way she knew how, via text messaging.
I have a question about your writing style. Do you have trouble locating the question mark?
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post #14 of 14
2/11/06 at 8:00am
I answered my question with a statement that was a continuation of the previous sentence, hence the use of a semi-colon instead of a question mark.

But short answer in case you didn't catch that: no.

But if you need your fix, here ya go: ???????
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