Thieves.

"some crackhead cocksucker who is now running around playing "Dani California" in his fuckin' hoop-d"

Did you see the guy? Because you seem pretty certain he's black.

Yeah, I think everybody's reaction would be the same to having something stolen. I'm not sure if everyone would be as quick to generalize the perpetrators in such a way, but yeah, thieves suck.

What, white guys can't be crackhead cocksuckers with a shitty car (thank you urban dictionary)? That's kind of racist, dev.

We're also assuming it was a male... let's be a little more PC, people.

I think I have the calmest reactions to theft of all my comrades. When I find that something of mine is gone, what is there to do beyond accepting the fact? Material possessions can be reobtained, and chances are the thief needed it more than I did, at least in the short term.

Not to mention the fact that I'm betting a white guy would be far more likely to roll around his 'hood blasting Red Hot Chili Peppers.

I had my car broken into way back in 95. Stole 24 CD's, my waiter shirt (wha?) and my prized bootleg of Nirvana rarities I had on audiotape. the tape was actually IN the player, so this cocksucking crackhead was thorough.

What bothers me the most is that he took my Breeders, Big Audio Dynamite and Ramones records and I am SURE he or she didn't even APPRECIATE them.

Really? Where? Your quote does not substantiate that. If you think all crackhead thieves are black, you're not only racist, you're fucking stupid.

Yeah, that post left a bad taste in my mouth too, sackley.

I remember a post a while ago where people were debating whether Will Smith was the right choice for I am Legend. 5 posts in, Dev chimed in with a "Wow you guys really seem to hate niggers".

Devin, come the fuck on, dude.

About 8 years ago, I went home to visit my folks. I had brought a bunch of laundry that I was going to do in the morning (what can I say...I was the embodiment of college stereotypes), but left it, along with my suitcase, in the backseat of my car overnight.

When I went out the next day, the laundry and my suitcase were gone. About $400 worth of clothes and personal items just disappeared, but the radio was untouched.

I would have preferred the radio being stolen over my favorite shirt at the time! Would have given me an excuse to get a CD player.

The worst part about the whole situation was the sense of violation that comes with some unknown person or persons just up and taking your hard-earned stuff. That's what hurt the most.

It's common knowledge by now that Devin is not racist, he's misunderstood. And blunt.

On the subject, 5 years ago, I got to catch a fucker in my car as he was searching my glove compartment, the door closed to look unsuspicious. Since I was parked on a fairly packed street (Ste-Catherine for those who know- at 5PM of all things), I signaled a cop car not a block away while walking away from the car. The cops parked right away, and walke to the car... from behind.
They were gracious enough not to slam the face of the poor fucker (a white guy) on my hood, thus on the brick wall nearby.

The most offensive assumption made about the thief thus far in this thread is:

A. He's a crackhead.
B. He's black.
C. He drives a "hoop-d."
D. He would intentionally listen to "Dani California."

I thought the Dani California comment was inferring that that's what Mattimus was listening to.

My buddy's unassumingly 5'3" wife (who happens to be a master & champion of Hung Ga kung-fu) was waiting for a bus in Newark area when some guy tried to make off with her purse. She quickly used some kind of submission technique on the dude, whooped his ass, and held him till someone called the cops. How embarrassed was that guy?

If Devin carried anymore "White Guilt", his spine would snap faster than Tom Cruise finding Katie's stash of postpartum medication.


Back on Topic:

I'm only really upset by stupid theives. Years ago, I had a convertable jeep wrangler with 1/2 doors and no locks. They cut the plastic zippered window to get into the car to steal it, then failed after poping off the ignition cover.

Hah, Ste. Catherine is PRECISELY where my car got broken into.

My condo was broken into about 2 years ago and I lost about four grand in computer equipment, electronics, games, movies, and airsoft guns. The shock wore off into feelings of anger over some asshole just presuming he had the right to take what was mine.

I had vivid fantasies of some low life (all the crackheads in my neighborhood are white btw...) trying to rob a convenience store with one of my airsoft guns, being surrounded by police before he could flee the scene, then being cut down in a Scarface-style hail of bullets which miraculously all strike him in the crotch or kneecaps. Helped get me through the night I had to sleep in my place with a busted deadbolt.

I see more white crackheads on Cops than anything else.

"You must spread some reputation around before giving it to Death Surge again."

Phew! My cousin was in Montreal for a model railroad convention a couple of weeks ago and had his truck broken into. Grabbed his laptop, stowed under the seat.

I loaned my film camera to my friend's girlfriend one night. We went out to a bar, had a couple drinks, and went back to his place. The place was completely empty. Not only did they steal everything in the place (my camera included), but they even stole the steaks out of the freezer.

The goddamn steaks! Bastards....

Answer D.

I lived in an apartment that was broken into twice. The first time they took my TV, VCR, microwave, telephones, even some of my blue jeans. Luckily my neighbor suprised them during the second incident and they only got my TV. For me, the only bright spot was my 2 cats hid under the bed and they left them alone so they were unharmed. The only way I can describe how it felt is that it is probably as close as I will ever feel to the violation a woman feels after a rape (AND I know I only felt about 1/1,000,000,000 of that type of violation). I always thought if there was karmic justice to be had, whoever wore those jeans would develop a case of jock itch so bad their equipment would rot off. Thankfully my insurance replaced everything. I moved out of that apartment after I was a suspect in a homcide for about 5 minutes. Maybe it was a bad area?

For the record....I never have had jock itch...It was more of a revenge thought without actually doing anything.

Buck up -- you got robbed by White Boy Bob from Out of Sight!

Dude, maybe you should clear up that jock itch...

Who steals CD's anymore? (This is the best side benefit of filesharing.) I've had people steal old tarps and gumboots, but not touch a disk.

Correct. Crazy cracked-up peckerwood.

If you ask me, cracky did the guy a favor.

Having something stolen from your car is indeed painful, but the anger you feel is a pale shadow compared to the overwhelming shock and rage of finding your whole car missing. It happened to me years ago while I was at a movie. As we were walking to the parking lot after the movie, my girlfriend suddenly asked me, "Did you move the car?" Ordinarily, your first instinct would be to look around just in case you were in the wrong row, but seeing an empty space between two cars that we remembered parking next to pretty much eliminated that possibility. This was back before everybody had cellphones, so we had to go back to the theater to call the cops. Even worse, after filling out the report we had to go back again to call my brother for a ride. A few days later, I get a call from the cops telling me they found my car. What they should have said was, "What's left of your car." At least it would have prepared me. When I got to where the pricks abandoned it, it was just a body on blocks. Wheels, engine, even the fucking seats, gone. It's a good thing my brother and I still had a junker (beach car) that I could drive till the insurance company paid up.

I had a case, where I was at a party, with like 70 cars parked down a farm road. The "party house" was right on the street, and there were guys taking money at the entrance to the road. Over the course or the night, they slacked off, and a car with like 4 guys rolls in. They proceed to smash every window they can find and steal stereos, and anything they can get their grubby mitts on. Not only did they steal my Pioneer stereo, but they CUT IT OUT OF THE DASH WITH A HACKSAW.
The stereo was gone, but they also took my AC/heat controls. They also stole my speakerbox, but I guess they couldn't fit it in the car with the rest of their loot, so they threw it into the field. I have never wanted to beat someone to death with my bare hands so much since. I was barely even drinking at the party, but this was the first time I ever blacked out from anger. I was in the house and someone told me my car had been fucked with. As I walked down the long ass road, I became more and more pissed until I ended up beating the shit out of my own car. I don't remember, but apparently I jump-kicked my car, fell, and my glasses went flying. Next thing I knew, I was borrowing a cop's flashlight to find them, out in the field.
The funny thing? I hadn't driven the car in months, and had gotten a new one. I basically "dusted it off" because the stereo was rad and I was trying to impress a girl I liked. Also... it might have been the only time EVER that I had left the stereo faceplate on.
I discovered later that around 30 cars were broken into(smashed windows). There was a SUV that was broken into and nothing was taken at all. I guess it had a factory stereo and the punks just went through the console and rearranged their pens.
I have plenty of stories, but this one popped in my head first. I fucking hate thieves.
That blows, sorry man. I was upset enough to have to replace my window and console. Insurance or not, I'd be out for blood.

*edit- "the" becomes "they"! It's like magic!

I had my car stereo stolen once. Speakers too. I didn't see who did it, but I was living in Modesto at the time so I know the asshole was white. Worst part was, the idiot left a perfect handprint on the window, complete with perfect fingerprints. YET, the police refused to even take a report despite the evidence. This was before Lacy Peterson was murdered and after the Gary Coduit thing died down, so they had nothing better to do.

The strangest car theft I ever had was when I lived in Oakland as a teen and worked at a mall record store. I came out of work one night to find the headlights stolen off of my VW Bug. That one still baffles me. It was so weird and cheap that I couldn't really get mad about it.

One of my friends had his car broken into, in his own driveway, and there was a set of prints so perfect that the cops could have identified the guy from a blurry photo of the prints. I don't think they give a shit sometimes, unless someone is dead. Even then, it's questionable.

My mom has told me several stories about her car, and friend's cars, being broken into when she lived in NYC. Lots of cases of people stealing car batteries. This was in the late 60's, and early 70's but still. Car batteries.

edit- can't type

My brothers car was stolen a few months back. It was later found just a few miles from where it was taken. There wasn't much damage done, but the thief had dropped his mobile phone in the car. Later we correctly guessed that his pin code was 0000. Unfortunately the phone didn't have his name or anything like that in it, although there were some funny messages. We gave the phone to the cops, but haven't heard anything from then since.

I was going to say that I would have kept the phone long enough to use up the guy's minutes, but then I realized that someone who steals a whole car propbably isn't too concerned about the status of their phone bill.

My friend had his car stolen years ago, and it was recovered on the side of the road a few days later. Aside from having the window smashed out, there wasn't any visible damage or extra wear and tear. However, in the back seat, the police found the following items that weren't there before:

One (1) hypodermic needle
One (1) newspaper
Two (2) unused condoms
One (1) fresh canteloupe

I can understand the needle, the condoms, maybe even the newspaper, but the canteloupe baffles me to this very day.

Impressive.

And there's probably somewhere, somehow, a certain someone who know how to turn these into a cultural/sexual experiment for the whole family...

Don't bring fabfunk in here.

Not a chance.

No mention of something dead I guess....

Note to self: Do not fuck with Napoleon14.

Funny, I've seen that movie a bunch of times, but never made the connection with my friend's robbery. Of course, now I will for the rest of my life. Thanks, LeFors!

I had my car stolen, too, but luckily there wasn't much gas in it, and they ran out on a busy street - so they had to leave it (undamaged) on the side of the road, where I found it a few days later. Happy Ending.

I had someone break into my home and go through my stuff, probably just looking for money. There's a real feeling of being violated when you see the mess they leave behind.

That's why you invest in a big ass dog. When your average thief approaches a home, he's (or she -let's be all PC) more likely to break into the place that doesn't sound like it houses Cujo. Plus the giant shit-bombs the dog leaves under all the windows would deter even the Hudson Hawk.

I know most of you will not believe this but my friend and I came out of a store in a shopping center in Columbus, OH and as we were walking to his car we saw a little person trying to jimmy his door open. My friend yelled at him and the little guy took off running. I just busted up laughing. The guy ended up jumping in a car that was on the other side of the parking lot and took off with whoever was in it, but it was probably the funniest thing I have ever seen.

That's a good idea, but I just got one of those motion detector things and propped it up in the kitchen window. It's not hooked up to anything (shhh), but anyone outside can't tell that.

Man, it's amazing how much theft you avoid when you don't drive. I'm starting to think it's the best decision I ever made.

You would think that would work .... however my house was robbed not once but TWICE whilst my two big dogs -- obtained for their ill tempers and large appetites-- apparently silently ushered the burglers in with great politeness and showed them round the joint, stopping to point out any items they might have missed in their haste.

But just try and get up in the night to pee and they'll rip you limb from limb.

Some fuckhead stole my Arrested Development season 2 DVD!!!

I thought this was a D & D thread.

I prefer Mage or Fighter myself.