Rated AARGH! - Page 2

And yet another! You know, I think I would be wittier and more verbose in these forum posts if I didn't always post it at midnight. While the witching hour is great for witching, it's not great for comic-teers. As we who enjoy drawing comics like to call ourselves.

Rated AARGH! #16 - Family

And Patrick, I don't know if you've always had that avatar and I've somehow missed it, and if so, I've been remiss, but Mission Hill was like the best show ever. I loved it. I even moved to Boston because of it. Well, maybe not BECAUSE of it, but i was pretty psyched on moving to the city such a great show was set in. And it's not at all because I identified with the main character. At all.

Keep the Poutine. Bring me back a Cuban or 3.

These things are great, and I really like that we get a little commentary from the creator is icing. I'm hoping for a few more additions as Chud and the Corner get cozy again this year.

Alex, thanks for posting the link to # 17! I had a plane and some Cubans to catch. Though I apologize Sammy, they were a bit more wily than I thought and managed to escape. Last time I saw them, they were heading into a bathroom with a chainsaw.

Glad y'all like the commentary! I'm always afraid I'm a bit too facetious for my own good. I sure do love that word.

But without further ado-

Rated AARGH! #18 - Hell yeah!

Holy hell, I think I witnessed this happen....

!?!?!??!

fa·ce·tious Pronunciation [fuh-see-shuhs]
adjective 1. not meant to be taken seriously or literally: a facetious remark.

I'm not going to lie, I do know the word but didn't recognize it. And If I can continue to be honest you often include words I am forced to go search or look up. Here in lies the difference between an educated man and ... well ... me.

I bet if we had a ditch digging contest, I would totally kick your ass!

On a side note, if you're in the market for some therapy; make sure you see a psychiatrist NOT a psychologist. One can give you drugs and the other can give you only words.

now if you'll excuse me its time for me to go and take my hand full of "the wife will be home soon" meds. The doctor says to help avoid any desire I may have to confront, argue, complain, be lazy and in any way uncooperative - I must take these exactly 30 minutes before she gets here.

Nice work yet again this week dude! keep em coming
T

You did indeed witness it my friend, and I believe you even had the vegetarian entree. I think you spilled some on your skirt actually. Zinger!

And Trevor, you would undoubtedly kick my ass in a ditch digging contest! Luckily I would befriend the guards and do their taxes for them and get a big poster to cover up the hole I was scraping in the wall and then I could escape and you'd be stuck there. So neener.

However in the interest of furthering education, I have included two bits of incredibly helpful information that you'll use every day at the end of the latest comic. You can thank me later.


Rated AARGH! #19 - Gustave

Gustave's the name of the croc by the way.

And yet another! When will the madness stop? Hopefully not until I can dive into a vault of gold coins and perform a fairly decent backstroke. I am now resisting an overwhelming urge to make further "stroke" commments. As my willpower where "stroking" is concerned is low (hee hee), I think I'll just go ahead and add the link -

Rated AARGH! #20 - Cursed

Thanks CC. I just discovered the awesomeness. Keep them coming.

Don't be discouraged by the lack of posts, by the way. We're still reading. It just seems sill to keep coming in here and posting that the new one is funny, too.

Is it wrong of me to be terribly amused by the fact that the mummy is wearing a scarab codpiece?

Oh, trust me, considering most of the stuff I see on message boards, I have no problem with the lack of posts. I'm just glad everyone's enjoying it enough to at least not post a picture of a turd with the word's "Y0RE C0m1c!!!!"" badly mspainted over it. Though that would be pretty funny in it's own right.

And there is certainly nothing wrong with scarab-codpiece based amusement! I was chuckling my face off as I drew it. It's what all the mummys are wearing these days! Well, all the cool ones anyway.

Rated AARGH! #21 - Myth Buster

Damn, just read all of AARGH! in a sititng.

Pretty good webcomic Mike, I really like the way you do eyes.

What webcomics do you read regularly?

Just a reiteration: You're doing great work!

Oh, you don't have to say it Alex, the flowers and teddy-bear say it all! And that's right, AARGH! is old enough to drink now! Geeze, 21. They grow so fast... I will have to make sure I take it out to celebrate properly this weekend. Perhaps with a flask of Maker's Mark and a screening of Smokin' Aces.

Thanks Nexus! I had another webcomic for a while where I did the eyes as just dots, but they weren't really expressive enough. The eyes in AARGH! are still pretty simple, but I've got a lot more room to play around with 'em, which is nice.

I regularly read Penny Arcade and VG Cats, and I also like to occasionally check out Scary-Go-Round (though I preferred the old art style). The Perry Bible Fellowship has moments of greatness, and I used to check out Diesel Sweeties all the time. Oh, and of course PVP every now and then.

Thanks Frank, I'm glad you're enjoying it!

Ah Robot attacks, how I love thee! There has been a derth of them in Rated AARGH! and I aim to fix that. And I still need to do a kaiju comic. And a giant squid one! Geeze, how am I neglecting my favorites? Horrible!

Rated AARGH! #22 - Trojan Style

r.o.b.

I remember fondly the xmas santa brought us our first nintendo (with r.o.b.) and that thing lasted about 29.4 seconds before it was cast into the basement/closet, never to be heard from again.

That was until I found out that r.o.b. can be used with the NEW Nintendo Wii. That's right! With the proper customization r.o.b. can be used to vent all your Wii frustrations (especially at the fact that you can't finish all the stupid challenges on Excite Truck). Personally I like the pimp slap but you can also; throw him against a wall, throw him at your friends head as a distraction, and I've even heard of r.o.b. being used as a controller holder ... which you kick eveytime you pick up the controller.

Now if I can just find a nice shirt that matches my power glove...

I agree, a R.O.B. shirt would rock. I can only assume there's gotta be one out there somewhere on the Intertubes. The Powerglove shirt is indeed pretty sweet, but it only reaches it's full potential when worn with said glove. Two words: Chick Magnet.

Rated AARGH! #23 - Valentines Day '07

This is great. Not only are they really funny, but you actually get them out every week, without fail so far.

I'll be checking back from now on.

Thanks! It's sometimes quite a chore to get the comics up on time, and Wednesdays I'm usually pretty tired at work, but I know that I personally hate it when I go to a site expecting a promised update and it's not there. I'm sure I'll miss a deadline at some point, but hopefully not for a long long time. Not so coincidentally, here's this week's reference-tastic, yet topical, entry!

Rated AARGH! #24 - BFF

I can't but help think of Brat Pack when reading today's strip. I think it's the only other comic with bloody urine it. Well, that I've read anyway. And I'm fine with that. No need to send me links and recommendations for other comics with sanguinated excrement. I'm good. Thanks though!

Rated AARGH! #25 - Color!

Man I love drawing hunchbacks! It's just good clean fun. Like that zombie puppet movie coming out. That thing looks AMAZING! Ever since Genesis's master video-work Land of Confusion I've been a big fan of puppets. Though Crank Yankers just embarrases me for some reason. I always feel bad for the poor rubes being tricked. A lot of them are just trying to help. I'm clearly a big softy. Unlike the hunchback guy in the latest strip.

Rated AARGH! #26 - Hunchback Love

Poor bastard. He probably should stop standing in front of that pit though. And who the hell has a bottomless pit in the middle of their courtyard? I mean I would expect it from Xerxes, he's got a cenobite executioner after all, but the Spartans? Couldn't that digging time have been used sharpening spears or something? Or to do more crunches?

Rated AARGH! #27 - Not Cool

This is awesome. Great work.

Remember that time you kept the trash in your hand until you found a garbage can instead of throwing it on the ground Alex? This is for that time. Don't litter everybody!

Thanks guys, glad you like it! I happened to read a book about that fateful battle about a year ago, and while it was pretty obvious some creative liberties were taken (which I am behind 100%) (I am all about getting creative with my liberties) here's a quick article that goes into it a bit if you're interested. Note that while many distortions are brought up, not once does it question the existence of bottomless pits or Leonidas's treatment of postmen.

Does anybody do ventriloquism anymore? I can't recall ever seeing a real live ventriloquist. Or having any desire too. I guess they don't often get their own movie or HBO specials. Ah well, I'm sure in a couple of generations they will be the coolest thing ever again and I will sit on my front porch decrying the entertainment taste of all the young'ns. I can't wait!


Rated AARGH! #28 - Occupational Hazard

Whenever I think of ventriloquism, I think of this one act that I saw on cable years ago in which there was a 10 or 12 year old girl with a muppet-style flower puppet. She kept yanking off the flower's petals and making it scream. If all ventriloquism was as amusingly twisted, I think it would have a better reputation.

That does sound pretty cool! And a bit disturbing. Though not quite as disturbing as when the dead roasted pig in your avatar blinked. I really shouldn't have had that sausage McMuffin for breakfast...

Hahaha! That was great! I will have to check it out again at home where I am less likely to get fired for LMAO, as they say. Clearly my lamentation for the death of the ventriloquism subgenre was a bit premature.

Technically, I sorta wish they would take the recent The Hills Have Eyes, remove the family, add some grizzled d00d in a blue jumpsuit with the number 13 on the back, and call it Fallout: The Movie. But they didn't and here we are. Though there is still talk of a Fallout 3, so I can keep holding my breath for a little longer at least...


Rated AARGH! #29 - Problem Solved

Not too much witty to add this time, just a poorly stifled yawn and a vaguely waved hand in the general direction of this week's strip. Do not take this to mean I don't love this rather comic-centered entry in the Rated AARGH! oeuvre, but only as an indication of my body's sincere desire to retire for the night.

Rated AARGH! #30 - A Superstitious and Cowardly Lot



p.s. 30! w00t!

my boy has skills!!!

You never cease to impress mr howland - that comic makes me want to own a cute little bat - even though they are demons of the air! j/k

As far as 2D games go, well we recently got ourselves an xbox 360 and we've downloaded some games I know you were a fan of ... like Beer Tapper (which btw the sensors changed to Root Beer Tapper - the douches) and TMNT the old 4 player arcade version (hell yeah, talk about old school!) so if you ever need a Paperboy fix, just swing on through.

With that said if you're going to get yourself a 360 you absolutely MUST get Gears Of War - holly crap dude, its amazing! The wife and I have wasted many many MANY brain cells and hours lost in the depths of the 8 player online audio included smack talking awesomely awesome game play. But we particularly miss having you around to help us with the exceptionally hard levels (like playing the campaign on INSANE UURRGGGHHH!!!!) plus I think we have a couple guys in our group that are (like yourself) on the next level

Anyway very nice comic this week. I'm sure you are probably bored of my compliments by now but even when you're tired you still pull off what others could only dream. Keep them coming good sir. I look forward to Wednesday morning every single week, thanks to you. You've done for Wednesday what strong bad once did for Monday.

Your pal
TnK

Thank you old friend! Gears is indeed an amazing game, though sadly my pad has yet to be graced with a 360. Though that's something I plan on rectifying within the next month or two, so I will let you know when you can toss grenades at my head online.

Speaking of grenades to the head, well not really, but I'm hurting for a segue here, I give you

Rated AARGH! #31 - Parental Guidance Suggested

I plan on getting a character guide up at some point for some of the more persistent ghouls and ghosts that show up in Rated AARGH!, but that probably won't happen for a while. Mainly I want to do it just so I can draw the mummy with a scarab for a codpiece again. I need to shoehorn him into some more comics. Not that he's in this one, but some vampires are, so that's alright then.

Rated AARGH! #32 - Vampires are Bad

I dig the metrosexual nosferatu.

Everybody loves metrosexuals! Well, they love themselves anyway, which seems rather nosferatish to me. Though sadly I think I missed the "ragging on metrosexuals" boat by two or three years... Regardless, he's awful fun to draw!

A spot of trouble uploading last night and as such I am much too tired to be any more witty than I already have been. So I leave you with an exhausted salute and a link to the most 33ish Rated AARGH! yet!


Rated AARGH! #33- Hard Bargain

Does Satan fuck that little girl?

Only in your sick mind. In mine, she trades in her infant sibling's soul for a pony.

Beat.

CUT TO: EXT. MAGICAL FIELD
Girl rides happily on pony forever and ever.

The question posed was what else could a little girl offer if not her soul. And it's Satan. I put two and two together and got rape.

EDIT: I didn't see the infant.

Ah. The infant is in the first two scenes, and the little girl is looking at the infant when Satan askes "what else could you offer me" so I thought the answer was "the infant" not "child rape."

Geeze, I knew I should have drawn the baby brother bigger! I assure whomever may be watching over my eternal soul that I have not drawn a comic where a little girl gets raped by the devil. I thought selling out her sibling was bad...

I'm glad you enjoy the look of pure bliss on her face as much as I did drawing it, Alex! Her unfettered joy at acquiring a pony (no matter the cost!) is what made me chuckle when I was coming up with this one.

So, wait.
He doesn't fuck the baby?

Heaven's no! He takes it down to Hell where it is fucked by the 11 Forgotten Daemon Princes of the 7th circle while having it's organs teased out to be used in the construction of further lament configuration boxes. Or that's what I reckoned anyway. I suppose he could have just needed a guest at his next forsaken tea-party as well... Perhaps we'll find out next week!

I sort of doubt it though.

I'll bet he fucked the pony, though. Satan has "Pony-Fucker" written all over his face.