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(2006) Quotes of the Year

post #1 of 45
11/15/06 at 11:27pm
Thread Starter 
What are your picks for the memorable lines of 2006? They can be movie, Television, political, whatever.

"Does it look like I got cunt written on my head?" Chev Chelios, Crank

"Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!" Sam the Man, Snakes of a Plane

"As always, I exit Stage RIGHT!" Tom slimbag Delay before resigning his congressional seat.

"Astro GLIDE!" Tech Jansen, The Colbert Report

"Who am I? I am the guy who does his fucking job! You must be the other guy!" Marky Mark as Dignam, The Departed
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post #2 of 45
11/15/06 at 11:56pm
Quote:
However, of all the things of those of us who were here five years ago could have forecast, of all the nightmares that unfolded before our eyes, and the others that unfolded only in our minds, none of us could have predicted this. Five years later this space is still empty. Five years later there is no memorial to the dead. Five years later there is no building rising to show with proud defiance that we would not have our America wrung from us by cowards and criminals. Five years later this country‘s wound is still open. Five years later this country‘s mass grave is still unmarked. Five years later this is still just a background for a photo op. It is beyond shameful.

At the dedication of the Gettysburg Memorial, barely four months after the last soldier staggered from another Pennsylvania field, Mr. Lincoln said, “We cannot dedicate. We cannot consecrate. We cannot hallow this ground. The brave men living and dead who struggled here have consecrated far above our poor power to add or detract.”

Lincoln used those words to immortal words to their sacrifice. Today they could use those words to rationalize their own reprehensible inaction. We cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate, we cannot hallow this ground, so they won‘t...

...How dare you, Mr. President? After taking cynical advantage of the unanimity and love and transmuting both into fraudulent war and needless death, after monstrously transforming it into fear and suspicion and turning that fear in to the campaign slogan of three elections. How dare you or those around you ever spin 9/11?...

...And then in perhaps his finest piece of writing, Rod Serling sums it up with words of remarkable prescience, given where we find ourselves, tonight. “The tools of conquest,” he said, “do not necessarily come with bombs and explosions and fallout. There are weapons that are simply thoughts, attitudes, prejudices, to be found only in the minds of men. For the record,” he said, “prejudices can kill and suspicion can destroy, and a thoughtless, frightened search for a scapegoat has a fallout all its own for the children and the children yet unborn.”

When those who dissent are told time and time again, as we will be if not tonight by the president, then tomorrow by his portable public chorus, that he is preserving our freedom, but that if we use that any of that freedom we are somehow un-American. When we are scolded if we merely question, we have “forgotten the lessons of 9/11,” look in to this empty space behind me and the bipartisanship upon which this administration also did not build, and tell me this—who has left this hole in the ground?

We have not forgotten, Mr. President. You have.

May this country forgive you.
--Keith Olbermann, "Countdown," Sept. 11, 2006
And now for something a little lighter.

Quote:
The rules of “shotgun” are very simple and very clear. The first person to shout “shotgun” when you’re within sight of the car gets the front seat. That’s how the game’s played. There are no exceptions for someone with a concussion.
--Steve Carell as Michael Scott, "The Injury" (The Office)
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post #3 of 45
11/16/06 at 12:03am
"Your ex-wife's pussy tastes like sweet butter." Vic Mackey, "The Shield"

"You don't shit where you eat. And you especially don't shit where I eat." Tony, "The Sopranos"

"Cool, a stingray." Steve Irwin

"Thanks. I never owned a refrigerator." Creed, "The Office"

"Al-Qaeda!" Chev, CRANK

"I shot her above the kneecap!" Jack Bauer, "24"
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post #4 of 45
11/16/06 at 12:36am
Another from Dignam:

"Treat FBI agents like mushrooms – feed ‘em shit and keep ‘em in the dark."
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post #5 of 45
11/16/06 at 1:40am
"Those undecided needn't have faith to be free
and those misguided, there was a plan for them to be
now you've got both sides claiming killing in God's name
but God is nowhere to be found, conveniently"
- Eddie Vedder

and I second Gambers' Dignam quote.
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post #6 of 45
11/16/06 at 2:14am
"Good for you, Jack." Christopher Henderson (Peter Weller), "24" season finale
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post #7 of 45
11/16/06 at 2:14am
You know, there's something strange about this homeless fellow. Oh wait, it's Jesus. - John C. Reilly

(that whole scene actually now that I think about it).

We're going to find out who did this. And we're going to kill them. - Vic Mackey
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post #8 of 45
11/16/06 at 2:24am
Thread Starter 
"Didn't Roman Polanski just win an Oscar?" Ellen Page, Hard Candy

"Lem I am so sorry buddy. But I had to...Right?" Shane, The Shield

"Were going to find out who did this, and then were going to kill them!" Vic Mackey, The Shield

"I enjoy cocaine because it is a fun thing to do...... I enjoy prostitutes because [edit] they are a fun thing to do. If you put them both together you will have a real good time." Congressman Robert Wexler (D. Florida), Colbert Report [Paraphrasing]
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post #9 of 45
11/16/06 at 2:26am
Shit, when you bring Colbert into this:

"What are the 10 commandments Congressman?"
"What are all of them."

"I thought I was French Vanilla"

*sigh*
- Colbert Report
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post #10 of 45
11/16/06 at 2:30am
And how can we forget:

"That's all well and good, Tom, but your little brother is STANDING IN THE MIDDLE OF AFGHANISTAN!"--Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip
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post #11 of 45
11/16/06 at 2:33am
If you don't chew Big Red, then f(beep) you!- Ricky Bobby
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post #12 of 45
11/16/06 at 3:30am
oh, another one I liked...

"Oh! So your job is to lead, via right decision, to the achievement of things."

-Jon Stewart on Bush
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post #13 of 45
11/16/06 at 3:33am
"Her vajeen hangs down like sleeve of wizard" - Borat
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post #14 of 45
11/16/06 at 6:45am
"Pull my finger" - Michael Caine: Children of Men.
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post #15 of 45
11/16/06 at 6:50am
"Let's say you have no clue what we do and leave it at that. If you knew what we did, we would not be good at our jobs. We would be cunts. (pause) Are you calling us cunts?" --Mark Whalberg in the role that will win him an Oscar.

"I do want to know what it tastes like"--Johnny Depp, successfully vocalizing every man in the world's lust for Keira Knightley.
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post #16 of 45
11/16/06 at 12:49pm
"You want a cigarette? Oh, you don't smoke. What are you some kind of health freak? Go fuck yourself." Alec Baldwin, The Departed. All in the delivery.

"Give me a smile, pussycat!" and "... I buy clock radio - he cannot afford. Great success." Borat
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post #17 of 45
11/16/06 at 1:29pm
I sort of came back to have a nervous breakdown, but my brother beat me to it. LONESOME JIM

Won the war? Don't be a fool! There is a limit even to foolishness. Wars must not happen. They only make you hungry. THE GREAT YOKAI WAR

Meet me on the roof, you fucking rat faggot! THE DEPARTED

I love you, really. With all due respect, you're a beautiful person. You're a credit to your race. SCOOP

What if they come in through the back door or the bathroom window like that infamous Beatles song? A SCANNER DARKLY

I'm short for my height. LUCKY NUMBER SLEVIN
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post #18 of 45
11/16/06 at 2:35pm
"Maybe I'll just sit here and bleed at you." BRICK

"You can't make somebody understand something if their salary depends upon them not understanding it." AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH

"Don't you know who I am? I'm the Juggernaut, bitch." X3

and of course

Lex Luthor: Come on, let me hear you say it, just once.
Lois Lane: You are insane.
Lex Luthor: No! No, not that... the other thing. Come on, I know it's on the tip of your tongue.
Lois Lane: Supermanwillnever...
Lex Luthor: WROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONGGGG!!!!!
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post #19 of 45
11/16/06 at 3:18pm

Ignore Me!

"The minute God crapped out a third caveman a conspiracy was formed against one of them!" - The Venture Brothers

"Look at this.. that head loves to lick my genitals. It seems a little weird, but I let him do it, 'cuz it feels great. The only problem is, I can taste it. I can taste my genitals. In my mouth. It's a conundrum" - The Venture Brothers
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post #20 of 45
11/16/06 at 6:03pm
This was in the new issue of Harper's Monthly:

Quote:
"We don't have much choice. Because we fucked up. Big time. No country in Europe has ever been so impudent. We have obviously been lying for two years. It was absolutely clear that what we were saying was not true. And all this time we haven't done anything. Nothing. You can't name a single major government measure that we can be proud of, apart from pulling the government out of this shit. If we have to square up with the country about what we have done, what will we say?

"We can play around for a bit longer--we could spend a long time performing a lot of fucking analyses--but not too long. The moment of truth will come swiftly. Divine providence, the abundance of cash in the world economy, and hundreds of tricks you don't need to know about have helped us survive so far. This is it. Reform or fall. And when I say fall, I mean Hungary, I mean the left, and frankly, I also mean myself.

"Politics is a fantastic thing. It's amazing. It is sensational to lead a country. I managed to get through the past year and a half because I was driven to do one thing: restore the left's faith in itself. That it can win. That it doesn't have to bow its head in this fucking country or shit itself in the face of the right. That it should at last learn to compare itself not to the right but to the world.

"This made me believe it's worth doing. It was grand. I loved it. It was the best time of my life. The one thing driving me now is that I'm making history. And not for the history books--I don't give a shit about them. I could care less if we're going to be in them or if I'm going to be in them. The question is whether we will do something big. It's worth being a politician here in the early twenty-first century. We can create a new world...

"...I almost died because I had to pretend for a year and a half that we were governing. Instead, we lied morning, noon, and night. I am through with this. We either do our job and then you've got your man, or you pick someone else. I won't be playing games. We will move forward aat a fast pace. If we cannot, and you say to me, "Yes , but..."--I don't think I'm needed for that. You can get someone else, and then I'll go write some fucking great books about the modern left."
--Hungarian Prime Minister Ferenc Gyurscany, speaking to members of his goverment, from a recording leaked in September
Also, that Brick quote is great, but I love:

Quote:
I got all five senses and I slept last night, so that makes me six up on all of you!
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post #21 of 45
11/16/06 at 11:58pm
Ricky Bobby: Well, Let me give you a saying from Colonel Sanders. I am too drunk to taste this chicken.....
[Got that from imdb but I'm pretty sure it's not exact]

Nathan Fillion: Save the Baby!
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post #22 of 45
11/17/06 at 1:02am
From "Shortbus"- "Everybody comes to New York... to be forgiven." Beautiful film.
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post #23 of 45
11/17/06 at 1:25am
Thread Starter 
"I'm a soldier of the Apocalypse!" Harsh Times
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post #24 of 45
11/20/06 at 10:46pm
"Everyone's going to know you died scratching my balls!" - Daniel Craig, "Casio Royale"
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post #25 of 45
11/21/06 at 12:03am
"I thought you were supposed to go into shock! I'm not in shock! It fuckin hurts!" - The Departed.
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post #26 of 45
11/21/06 at 6:04pm
"Enjoy your clams cocksuckers."-Costello to priests

Borat: You telling me the man who try to put a rubber fist in my anus was a homosexual?

Cal Naughton, Jr.: There is something I want to get off my chest. It's about that summer, when you went away to community college. I got an offer to do Playgirl Magazine, and I did it. I did a full spread for Playgirl Magazine. I mean spread man, I pulled my butt apart and stuff. I was totally nude. it was weird, I... I mean you probably didn't hear about it because I went under the name of Mike Honcho. But I just wanted you to know that. If you can hear me, if it got into your brain somehow. That I spread my buttcheeks as Mike Honcho.
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post #27 of 45
11/22/06 at 12:29am
Thread Starter 
"You can talk, you can talk, you're brave now motherf**ker. Throw his ass out. He's a nigger! He's a nigger! He's a nigger! A nigger, look, there's a nigger!"

-Michael Richards
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post #28 of 45
11/22/06 at 12:35am
Well, if you're going to go there:

"Fucking Jews...the Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world...Are you a Jew?...What are you lookin' at, sugar tits?"
--Mel Gibson
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post #29 of 45
11/22/06 at 1:42pm
Borat: High Five!

Cartman: When Hitler rose to power, there were a lot of people who just stopped playing. You know who those people were? The French. Are you French, Clyde?
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post #30 of 45
11/22/06 at 2:14pm
My sig quote.

The Departed should have a special award for some of the most enjoyable dialogue (great delivery by the actors) in recent memory.
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post #31 of 45
11/23/06 at 11:34pm
I agree, the three leads were fantastic (my top film of the year so far), but Baldwin and Walhberg were on fire in that movie. I love the way Baldwin says "Patriot Act! Paaaatriot Aaact!"

And of course:

Baldwin: Go fuck yourself.
Walhberg: I'm tired from fucking your wife.
Baldwin: How is your mother?
Walhberg: Good, she's tired from fucking my father.
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post #32 of 45
11/24/06 at 2:09am
James Bond: We're supposed to be in love. I am Mr. Arlington Beach, professonal gambler and you're Miss Stephanie Broadchest.
Vesper Lynd: I am not!
James Bond: You have to trust me on this.
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post #33 of 45
11/25/06 at 5:39pm
Thread Starter 
Colbert: Reality has a well know Liberal bias.
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post #34 of 45
11/25/06 at 11:50pm
Good evening godless sodimites

and

By giving you a golden idol to worship, KNEEL BEFORE YOUR GOD BABYLON!

Both from Colbert at the emmys.
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post #35 of 45
11/26/06 at 10:33pm
"Someone's killed their children and turned them into cookies, and I wanna see that!"
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post #36 of 45
11/30/06 at 4:39pm
Another Colbert:

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST LOST TO BARRY MANILOW!"
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post #37 of 45
11/30/06 at 5:01pm
its devils food.

and then, i cant find this other one, but it is awesome. heres what colbert said when tasting the terrorist cake after the democrats won back the house and senate...

"mmmm! tastes like surrender!"

there are a couple from slither that are worthy.
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post #38 of 45
12/1/06 at 2:06am
"I swear to God, they had this one bitch was pullin pistols out her pussy! Shit was unseemly." - Method Man
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post #39 of 45
12/1/06 at 12:39pm
"Death is the road to awe" - Lord of Xibalba (The Fountain)
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post #40 of 45
12/14/06 at 11:55am
Ari Gold: What if I were to tell you that I had a 22 inch cock, is that something you might be interested in?
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post #41 of 45
12/14/06 at 12:04pm
Cpt. Vidal: You could have obeyed me!
Dr. Ferreiro: But captain, obey for obey's sake... That's something only people like you can do.

Not sure that's exactly right (pinched it from IMDB) but this was among the most powerful scenes in the film for me. All in the delivery, of course.
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post #42 of 45
12/14/06 at 12:10pm
"All right." -- Matt Damon at the end of The Departed
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post #43 of 45
12/15/06 at 9:31pm
Thread Starter 
"ALMOST" Apocalypto

"He's Kinda cute" Natalie Maines talking about a stalker in Shut up and Sing.
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post #44 of 45
12/15/06 at 9:43pm
Quote:
May this country forgive you.
--Keith Olbermann, "Countdown," Sept. 11, 2006

That was the most long winded and boring quote of the year.
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post #45 of 45
12/15/06 at 10:01pm
ElCapitanAmerica= TERRORIST.
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