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A Notch On The Belt

post #1 of 31
12/5/06 at 8:08pm
Thread Starter 
I'm a bit bored with sex. I hope this is just some sort of funk, but I fear it may be the end. The last few times were with unimaginative partners with decidedly smaller libidos, and while both parties were momentarily pleased, I could have thought of many other places I'd enjoy being.

I'm getting older now- is this something that others here are dealing with? At what point do you stop becoming the young buck that could stick your penis in everything and start to become the person who rationalizes sex, who looks at his watch and even, sometimes, just gets tired?

These days, the most appealing aspect to sex, with or without condoms, comes from the pleasure in adding a notch to my belt. I wish I had kept track, as I have no recollection of exactly how many women I've been with, but now names and faces have been fused together in my head. And there's really very little joy in the notch-adding, as it's pretty shallow and superficial, and doesn't seem to have any purpose behind it.

I'll get snark for this thread, sure. But what I want to have is a mature discussion of the loss of passion. Am I the only twentysomething with this issue? What of thirtysomethings?
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post #2 of 31
12/5/06 at 8:14pm
fabfunk... has a soul?
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post #3 of 31
12/5/06 at 8:20pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by fabfunk
Look at me!
...
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post #4 of 31
12/5/06 at 8:59pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by fabfunk
Am I the only twentysomething with this issue?
Not really, but then again you got bored after corpse-fucking, so I can't blame you for not trying.

At the point you're at, what you may need is a man. Or a mongoose. Or both for that matter. Keep searching.
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post #5 of 31
12/5/06 at 10:18pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by fabfunk
Am I the only twentysomething with this issue?
Yes. Yes you are.
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post #6 of 31
12/6/06 at 10:20am
I think your next level involves strap-on's, fab.
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post #7 of 31
12/6/06 at 11:29am

Notching the belt

Quote:
Originally Posted by fabfunk
I'm a bit bored with sex. I hope this is just some sort of funk, but I fear it may be the end. The last few times were with unimaginative partners with decidedly smaller libidos, and while both parties were momentarily pleased, I could have thought of many other places I'd enjoy being.

I'm getting older now- is this something that others here are dealing with? At what point do you stop becoming the young buck that could stick your penis in everything and start to become the person who rationalizes sex, who looks at his watch and even, sometimes, just gets tired?

These days, the most appealing aspect to sex, with or without condoms, comes from the pleasure in adding a notch to my belt. I wish I had kept track, as I have no recollection of exactly how many women I've been with, but now names and faces have been fused together in my head. And there's really very little joy in the notch-adding, as it's pretty shallow and superficial, and doesn't seem to have any purpose behind it.

I'll get snark for this thread, sure. But what I want to have is a mature discussion of the loss of passion. Am I the only twentysomething with this issue? What of thirtysomethings?
__________________________________________________ _______________

It happens to a lot of people and the best I can offer in the advice column is to either rest for a while (saving up your energy and focusing on the other things that you speak of) or go on an unholy pussy quest slaying only girls that still have 'Rachel" haircuts, have the middle name of Lynn, or whatever it takes to get the fire back.

Remember I am not a qualified medical expert.
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post #8 of 31
12/6/06 at 11:33am

I also find it interesting that

your avatar suffered the same problem. I will not advocate chainsaw, axes, and other large items. Great book and flick though.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Quote:
Originally Posted by fabfunk
I'm a bit bored with sex. I hope this is just some sort of funk, but I fear it may be the end. The last few times were with unimaginative partners with decidedly smaller libidos, and while both parties were momentarily pleased, I could have thought of many other places I'd enjoy being.

I'm getting older now- is this something that others here are dealing with? At what point do you stop becoming the young buck that could stick your penis in everything and start to become the person who rationalizes sex, who looks at his watch and even, sometimes, just gets tired?

These days, the most appealing aspect to sex, with or without condoms, comes from the pleasure in adding a notch to my belt. I wish I had kept track, as I have no recollection of exactly how many women I've been with, but now names and faces have been fused together in my head. And there's really very little joy in the notch-adding, as it's pretty shallow and superficial, and doesn't seem to have any purpose behind it.

I'll get snark for this thread, sure. But what I want to have is a mature discussion of the loss of passion. Am I the only twentysomething with this issue? What of thirtysomethings?
Reply
post #9 of 31
12/6/06 at 11:33am
Did anyone else hear fabfunk's entire post with Madeline Kahn's song from Blazing Saddles in their head? Did anyone else's stomach revolt at the idea of fabfunk in her outfit?
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post #10 of 31
12/6/06 at 1:10pm
I think you're turning into Your Conservative Dad, fabby.
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post #11 of 31
12/8/06 at 3:34am
It would appear, my young Fabfunk that you have...matured.

Soon, food will replace sex as the best thing ever.
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post #12 of 31
12/8/06 at 4:46am
Quote:
Originally Posted by General Zod
Soon, food will replace sex as the best thing ever.
Oh food! Glorious, amazing food!
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post #13 of 31
12/8/06 at 4:49am
i might suggest actually building a substantial relationship. meet someone and hang out and dont have sex for 2 months. thatll wake your ass up.
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post #14 of 31
12/8/06 at 4:57am
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheCynic
i might suggest actually building a substantial relationship. meet someone and hang out and dont have sex for 2 months. thatll wake your ass up.
Now, back to the food. In this serious, committed relationship that you'll be entering into, you'll need to master cooking. I'm talking some serious cooking, now.

Become a master of pasta. Why? Because it's easy to screw up, and if you are good at it, that shows attention to detail.

Oh, make your own sauce!! I cannot stress that enough. Do not use the crap from a jar, and if you do, throw it away in your neighbor's trash can and say that you're not sure that your sauce worked out tonight.
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post #15 of 31
12/8/06 at 7:02am
I think telling fabfunk to "make his own sauce" is a pretty dangerous recommendation.
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post #16 of 31
12/8/06 at 10:49am
Bring on the Mammal Sauce.
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post #17 of 31
12/8/06 at 10:53am
Did someone say Mammal Sauce?

Fabfunk, you're just growing up. You'll eventually find someone you want to stick with that won't get boring. I've been banging the same girl for 2 1/2 years now, and I still wake up sore every morning. 3 times last night has left my arms and thighs throbbing today...
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post #18 of 31
12/8/06 at 12:44pm
It is scientifically impossible for Fabfunk to stay with the same girl for 2 1/2 years. The decomposition process sees to that.
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post #19 of 31
12/8/06 at 9:01pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Java
Oh, make your own sauce!! I cannot stress that enough. Do not use the crap from a jar, and if you do, throw it away in your neighbor's trash can and say that you're not sure that your sauce worked out tonight.
Jokes aside, how can I start? What would be the best strategy? I've just picked up cooking, and I'd like to make my own sauce, but I'm too kitchen-ignorant, or maybe too afraid, to really experiment with my own sauce.
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post #20 of 31
12/9/06 at 2:10am
Rachel Ray is a good start. Watch the show. Start off slowly.

Read some books. Cook books. Learn some recipes. Once you've got some down, start trying a few things with them...mix it up a bit.

Then....there's that pesky personal hygiene thing. Chicks dig the clean guys.
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post #21 of 31
12/9/06 at 2:36am

Tomato Sauce for Pasta, with Roma Tomatoes

Quote:
Originally Posted by fabfunk
Jokes aside, how can I start? What would be the best strategy? I've just picked up cooking, and I'd like to make my own sauce, but I'm too kitchen-ignorant, or maybe too afraid, to really experiment with my own sauce.
6 Roma tomatoes, quartered
2 cans tomato paste, the 3 oz. ones
1/3 cup red wine, cheap, easy and effective = cabernet sauvignon
2 teaspoons extra virgin olive oil
2 cloves crushed garlic
2 tablespoons chopped basil, make sure it's fresh
1 teaspoon chopped oregano, yet again it needs to be fresh
1 cup chicken broth
1-2 teaspoons salt

Purée the tomatoes with the wine and tomato paste in a food processor or a blender. Make sure it's smooth.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wikipedia
Purée and (more rarely) mash are general terms for food, usually vegetables or legumes, that has been ground, pressed, and/or strained to the consistency of a soft paste or thick liquid
Get the olive oil going in a large sauce pan over medium heat. Add the garlic, basil and the oregano and sauté for about a minute.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wikipedia
Food that is sautéed is usually cooked for a relatively short period of time over high heat inorder to brown the food, while preserving its color, moisture and flavor.
Now, add the tomato mixture, the chicken broth, and the salt to the sauce pan. I always end up using more salt, but that's because I like salt. If you're not a salt fiend, don't use any more than 2 teaspoons.

Now, bring all of it to a boil.

Immediately reduce it to LOW heat and simmer for about a half hour.

The lower you can get the heat without losing heat completely, the better. Cooking it at a lower temp for longer will really help the overall quality. If you can, make the sauce a day ahead of time and let it sit overnight in the fridge, that'll do wonders for the flavor. The next day, just put it over low heat in the sauce pan to get it ready.
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post #22 of 31
12/9/06 at 5:15am
Sounds like fabfunk will be shooting his own sauce all over the pan sooner than he expected.
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post #23 of 31
12/9/06 at 5:22am
Rachel Ray....Mmmmm good.

You know, all of the cooking shows on Food Network are very informative for us kitchen 'tards. Except the one with the pretentious Italian chick. She has a weird nose and thinks way too highly of herself. The old lady Paula is good stuff too.
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post #24 of 31
12/9/06 at 5:40am
Rachel Ray does provide some good shit. I want to hate fuck that italian chick with her pushed up titties and fake personality.
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post #25 of 31
12/9/06 at 5:56am
I'd pig fuck her.
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post #26 of 31
12/9/06 at 9:21am
Rachael Ray, by the way.
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post #27 of 31
12/10/06 at 9:09am
I think THIS is what Fab's looking for.
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post #28 of 31
12/10/06 at 10:36am
Please tell me that's somebody's idea of a joke.
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post #29 of 31
12/10/06 at 5:56pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Java
Rachael Ray, by the way.
I love the Rachel. The italian chick with the strange nose would get a pig fuck.
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post #30 of 31
12/10/06 at 10:11pm
maybe we should move him away from the knives and shit. maybe talk up walking or something...without the weaponery and blood and death and....
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post #31 of 31
12/10/06 at 11:32pm
Just buy a jar of Ragu, add some salt and pepper with a dash of cum and call it a night.
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