CHUD.com Community › Forums › POLITICS & RELIGION › Religion A-Z › Jesus H. Cruise!
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Jesus H. Cruise!

post #1 of 28
1/23/07 at 8:10pm
Thread Starter 
http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,4-2007030603,00.html

Quote:
TOM Cruise is the new “Christ” of Scientology, according to leaders of the cult-like religion.

The Mission: Impossible star has been told he has been “chosen” to spread the word of his faith throughout the world.

And leader David Miscavige believes that in future, Cruise, 44, will be worshipped like Jesus for his work to raise awareness of the religion.

A source close to the actor, who has risen to one of the church’s top levels, said: “Tom has been told he is Scientology’s Christ-like figure.

“Like Christ, he’s been criticised for his views. But future generations will realise he was right.”

Cruise joined the Church of Scientology in the ’80s. Leader L Ron Hubbard claimed humans bear traces of an ancient alien civilisation
I guess this is what happens when you funnel enough cash into a bullshit tax shelter created by a terrible science-fiction writer. Nice work, Tom!
Reply
post #2 of 28
1/23/07 at 8:16pm
Does he really believe this is going to help his career?
Reply
post #3 of 28
1/23/07 at 8:19pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElCapitanAmerica
Does he really believe this is going to help his career?
At the very least he hopes it will resurrect it.
Reply
post #4 of 28
1/23/07 at 8:22pm
I don't think Tom cares much about his career at this point. He is smart enough to know the laws of diminishing returns are starting to pile up at this stage of his " career ".

What will be fascinating to see is if he starts to slip into more supporting roles (ala Magnolia) which would be a smarter move at this point.

I think ol Tom knows his pretty boy leading man days are a thing of the past.
Reply
post #5 of 28
1/23/07 at 8:22pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunwukong
At the very least he hopes it will resurrect it.
Yeah. But I'm sure he's going to get nailed for this.
Reply
post #6 of 28
1/23/07 at 8:23pm
Does this mean Travolta is Vice Christ?
Reply
post #7 of 28
1/23/07 at 8:32pm
No it means he's Destro to Cruise's Cobra Commander.
Reply
post #8 of 28
1/23/07 at 8:36pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by juan23
Yeah. But I'm sure he's going to get nailed for this.



ZING!
Reply
post #9 of 28
1/23/07 at 8:52pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moltisanti
Does this mean Travolta is Vice Christ?
Assistant to the Scientology Christ.
Reply
post #10 of 28
1/24/07 at 12:54am
Oh, man, that title is so misleading. I was hoping there'd be a weeklong Carnival cruise peopled entirely by the born agains.

Oh, and I'm patenting this idea. So don't take it!
Reply
post #11 of 28
1/24/07 at 3:58am
If this means we have to endure The Passion of the Cruise, I'm not happy. Still, if the government feels the need to execute him painfully in order to make an example to the masses, well at least that would be interesting.
Reply
post #12 of 28
1/24/07 at 4:02am
I don't know why everyone is always so negative about his scientological outbursts. It's high comedy. Fingers crossed for Battlefield Earth 4000.
Reply
post #13 of 28
1/24/07 at 5:06am
I have it on good authority that Xenu is pleased by this ridiculously stupid move by the Church of Scientology. He laughs at this Tom Cruise and his shortness.

Hail Xenu!
Reply
post #14 of 28
1/24/07 at 5:13pm
Quote:
TOM Cruise is the new “Christ” of Scientology, according to leaders of the cult-like religion.
Hopefully this means he'll commit a capital crime and be subsequently executed.
Reply
post #15 of 28
1/24/07 at 5:16pm

Haha

Quote:
Originally Posted by Overlord
Hopefully this means he'll commit a capital crime and be subsequently executed.

Just thought it needed to be said twice
Reply
post #16 of 28
1/24/07 at 5:47pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dloes
Just thought it needed to be said twice
Thank you, and I'll be here all week.
Reply
post #17 of 28
1/24/07 at 7:08pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by juan23
Yeah. But I'm sure he's going to get nailed for this.
No offense, Overlord, but this superior version of the same joke predates yours.
Reply
post #18 of 28
1/24/07 at 8:14pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Schwartz
No offense, Overlord, but this superior version of the same joke predates yours.
I guess the Schwartz was not with me.
Reply
post #19 of 28
1/24/07 at 8:51pm
Nice. Gold stars all around.
Reply
post #20 of 28
1/24/07 at 10:39pm
It's things like this that keep me going in life.
Reply
post #21 of 28
3/13/07 at 6:49am
So if he's the Scientolojesus, then he should be able to perform miracles with his OT powers like getting junkies off heroin in 3 days (actual claim) and convincing people he's such a swell person (never mind that this is his third marriage and that he has this weird Maverick fixation)...
Reply
post #22 of 28
3/13/07 at 8:17am
I'll believe it when he brings Travolta's career back from the dead.
Reply
post #23 of 28
3/13/07 at 8:30am
Ha! "What Tarantino giveth, Hubbard takes away...and then some"
Reply
post #24 of 28
3/13/07 at 2:34pm
I just want to see Tom Cruise on the Today Show again and have Matt Lauer ask him "So are you supposed to be Sceintology's Jesus?" and then Cruise pauses and does one of his contrived weird faces and says "You're so glib Matt."
Reply
post #25 of 28
3/14/07 at 6:04am
...what's horrible is that it would play out in precisely that fashion.
Reply
post #26 of 28
3/14/07 at 3:56pm
Maybe this gets "The Thetan" the greenlight it so sorely deserves.
Reply
post #27 of 28
3/22/07 at 3:18am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfwood
Scientolojesus
amazing
Reply
post #28 of 28
4/6/07 at 5:20pm
I lost all faith in the Dwarf when he let Kidman get away.
He sucks.
Reply
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Religion A-Z
CHUD.com Community › Forums › POLITICS & RELIGION › Religion A-Z › Jesus H. Cruise!