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Reasons you don't kill yourself

post #1 of 82
5/11/07 at 1:26pm
Thread Starter 
(With apoligies to Slater.)

...
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post #2 of 82
5/11/07 at 1:55pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Whirlybird
(With apoligies to Slater.)

...
How cumSlater gets all teh apoligies??
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post #3 of 82
5/11/07 at 1:57pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Graham
How cumSlater gets all teh apoligies??
Well, it might have to do with the fact that his towel smells of balls and Crab Rangoon.
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post #4 of 82
5/11/07 at 1:58pm
Too lazy. Waiting for time to do it for me.
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post #5 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:00pm
I was dead up until 1974. I'm enjoying this new experience and I am in no hurry to go back.
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post #6 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:05pm
Haven't fucked a Suicide Girl yet.
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post #7 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:11pm
Quarant hasn't fucked a Suicide Girl yet.
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post #8 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:22pm
CHUD.com. It keeps me going. Seriously.
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post #9 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:22pm
Ian Challis hasn't killed himself yet.
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post #10 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:26pm
Patrick hasn't fucked a cantaloupe yet.
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post #11 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:27pm
Patrick hasn't admitted to fucking a cantaloupe yet.
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post #12 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:28pm
Too many personal secrets would be revealed when my loved ones go through my possessions.
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post #13 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:34pm
Haven't promised American citizenship to a prostitute yet.
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post #14 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:35pm
Jumped off building, keep landing on my feet.
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post #15 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:38pm
Need to know if Meredith finally ends up with McDreamy.
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post #16 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:40pm
cause it's the pussy way to go.

(unless surrounded by a room full of zombies, monsters, etc., and i'm down to my last bullet)
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post #17 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:57pm
Garage door won't go all the way down.
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post #18 of 82
5/11/07 at 2:59pm
Need to live long enough to name my next son Cletus VanDamme.

JS
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post #19 of 82
5/11/07 at 3:10pm
Because I want to become a matyr... only being an atheist I'm stumped for a cause.
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post #20 of 82
5/11/07 at 3:19pm
'Cuz that, like, smacks of effort, man.
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post #21 of 82
5/11/07 at 4:07pm
I'm scared. I'll be the honest one.
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post #22 of 82
5/11/07 at 4:08pm
Can't commit suicide. Eating.
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post #23 of 82
5/11/07 at 4:10pm
Haven't made myself look like nearly as big an ass as I would like.
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post #24 of 82
5/11/07 at 4:10pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris O.
Can't commit suicide. Eating.
What are you eating? Maybe you are subconsciously trying to commit suicide.
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post #25 of 82
5/11/07 at 4:12pm
Too many movies I need to see, and make.
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post #26 of 82
5/11/07 at 4:12pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amphibatron
What are you eating? Maybe you are subconsciously trying to commit suicide.
Pills...is that bad?
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post #27 of 82
5/11/07 at 4:14pm
You know, now that you mention it, I don't really know. Huh.
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post #28 of 82
5/11/07 at 5:14pm
Too busy.
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post #29 of 82
5/11/07 at 5:16pm
Want to see how long it takes before for an actually witty response hits this thread.
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post #30 of 82
5/11/07 at 5:20pm
Still holding out hope that the world will learn to use the search function.
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post #31 of 82
5/11/07 at 5:20pm
Seriously?

The goddamn World Series.
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post #32 of 82
5/11/07 at 5:21pm
Because (Insert M Night Shyamalan Twist Here).
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post #33 of 82
5/11/07 at 5:26pm
I finally got the 5 bucks God owed me in the mail. I was so close to looking him up.
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post #34 of 82
5/11/07 at 5:26pm
Haven't seen Once Upon a Time in the West in a theater.
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post #35 of 82
5/11/07 at 5:27pm
Sold soul to Satan. Stiffing him on the bill as long as possible.
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post #36 of 82
5/11/07 at 5:29pm
As my friend once said "Any day you don't put a gun in your mouth and pull the trigger is a good day."
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post #37 of 82
5/11/07 at 5:50pm
cuz i'm more creative than van gogh, hemingway, and cobain...COMBINED!
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post #38 of 82
5/11/07 at 6:01pm
Waiting for Policar to send me his short film.
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post #39 of 82
5/11/07 at 6:28pm
I only have 1 green rep box.
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post #40 of 82
5/11/07 at 6:34pm
Who says I haven't?
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post #41 of 82
5/11/07 at 6:37pm
I'm the only one around here who does housework. Who'd clean up the mess?
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post #42 of 82
5/11/07 at 6:53pm
I must stay around long enough to repay all who've caused strife.
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post #43 of 82
5/11/07 at 7:28pm
Suicide is an unforgivable sin! Homicide on the other hand...
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post #44 of 82
5/11/07 at 7:30pm
Going to see The Police on July 16. After that anything goes.
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post #45 of 82
5/11/07 at 7:36pm
Thread Starter 
Haven't read my copy of The Watchmen yet(picked it up yesterday.)
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post #46 of 82
5/11/07 at 11:50pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greg David
I'm the only one around here who does housework. Who'd clean up the mess?
I think I might have to use that one too, I don't even want to think about the conditions my roommates would be living in if I offed myself.
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post #47 of 82
5/11/07 at 11:56pm
Because I've told other people not to off themselves for various reasons, and if I did it myself I'd be a hypocrite.


Seriously: never felt the urge to.
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post #48 of 82
5/12/07 at 12:01am
Because I was Catholic for seven years, and even that was enough to fuck me up for life. Also, because I'd probably mess it up and wind up brain-damaged or disabled for the rest of my life.
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post #49 of 82
5/12/07 at 12:01am
Haven't yet fucked a shaved asian.
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post #50 of 82
5/12/07 at 12:03am
Because, god damnit, Disco will come back.
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