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Fabfunk @ AICN

post #1 of 72
6/8/07 at 8:52am
Thread Starter 
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/32917

Maybe now he can hit on Knowles' sister.
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post #2 of 72
6/8/07 at 8:54am
Well, our gain is AICN's loss.
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post #3 of 72
6/8/07 at 9:09am
They still do that "1st" bullshit in their talkbacks?
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post #4 of 72
6/8/07 at 9:10am
At least he's finally among equals.
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post #5 of 72
6/8/07 at 9:18am
1st!!!11! among equals, no less.
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post #6 of 72
6/8/07 at 9:23am
Quote:
Originally Posted by ludmir88
Fabfunk you must be called Fagfunk!!!
hahaha
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post #7 of 72
6/8/07 at 9:35am
Quote:
So last night, I’m pretty sure I was a part of a very special audience
Ok first movie review I've read where someone wasn't sure if they were actually there or not. Though after his podcast voicemail I can't say I'm surprised.
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post #8 of 72
6/8/07 at 9:36am
Fabfunk is akin to the alien invaders from "Independence Day". Like a locust, he jumps from site to site, sucking it dry of all intellectual resources, then moving on to the next victim while leaving the empty (and sexually molested) corpse of his previous host to dry in the sun and turn to dust.

First "Rotten Tomatoes", then CHUD, now AICN. Where's Goldblum with a computer virus to stop him?
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post #9 of 72
6/8/07 at 9:39am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Death Surge
Fabfunk is akin to the alien invaders from "Independence Day".
"What do you want us to do?"

"DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.... SO I CAN HAVE SEEEEEEEEX WITH YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU."
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post #10 of 72
6/8/07 at 9:53am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Death Surge
Fabfunk is akin to the alien invaders from "Independence Day". Like a locust, he jumps from site to site, sucking it dry of all intellectual resources, then moving on to the next victim while leaving the empty (and sexually molested) corpse of his previous host to dry in the sun and turn to dust.

First "Rotten Tomatoes", then CHUD, now AICN. Where's Goldblum with a computer virus to stop him?
There are no viruses left that he hasn't been exposed to. Even Goldblum can't help us.
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post #11 of 72
6/8/07 at 9:58am
So this is what he was raving about on his Facebook. Still wonder how he got an audience with Cronenberg. Probably saw him on the side of the road fucking a dead woman's leg scar.
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post #12 of 72
6/8/07 at 10:20am
Good for him. Seriously. Who among us wouldn't want to meet David Cronenberg and see his movie?
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post #13 of 72
6/8/07 at 10:31am
If it meant being fabfunk, I think I would pass.
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post #14 of 72
6/8/07 at 10:38am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Patrick Ripoll
So this is what he was raving about on his Facebook. Still wonder how he got an audience with Cronenberg. Probably saw him on the side of the road fucking a dead woman's leg scar.
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post #15 of 72
6/8/07 at 10:40am
"You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Alan "Nordling" Cerny again."
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post #16 of 72
6/8/07 at 10:48am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe LeFors
"You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Alan "Nordling" Cerny again."
Yeah.

Oh and lucky fucking Fabfunk, huh?
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post #17 of 72
6/8/07 at 10:51am
He didn't beat up anyone afterwards in the theater parking lot.

Some people have no respect for tradition.
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post #18 of 72
6/8/07 at 11:34am

Omg First!

Flames on Optimus = This Year's Little Miss Fabfunk!

edit: I guess I missed the early drama, but why do so many people here dislike Fabfunk?
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post #19 of 72
6/8/07 at 11:42am
So, he did get that picture with Cronenberg. He kept going on and on about his sexy picture.

I figured he met some charming homeless lady and got the go ahead to put it up her pooper.
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post #20 of 72
6/8/07 at 11:48am
What do you mean, "got the go-ahead"?
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post #21 of 72
6/8/07 at 12:17pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabriel Williams
What do you mean, "got the go-ahead"?
The homeless lady gave over the rights to her corpse to Fabfunk's dickerin'
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post #22 of 72
6/8/07 at 12:23pm
When I saw the headline over at AICN, I did a double take.
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post #23 of 72
6/8/07 at 12:26pm
If you use this, I am Fabfunk.

So iconic.
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post #24 of 72
6/8/07 at 12:37pm
I agree, good for him. I can't believe some'a you guys sometimes.
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post #25 of 72
6/8/07 at 12:46pm
I'm not following your logic. How does Fabfunk seeing a Cronenburg movie negate his creepy awfulness?
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post #26 of 72
6/8/07 at 12:49pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason P. Thompson
If you use this, I am Fabfunk.

So iconic.
If I had any assemblance of an idea of how to use Photoshop, or even the program itself, I would be all about an "I Am Fabfunk" poster a la the "I Am Legend" poster. Vampires, corpses, necrophilia... c'mon, it sells itself.
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post #27 of 72
6/8/07 at 12:50pm
Who said it did? I'm saying that he's in an enviable position, getting to see Cronenberg's latest and getting to talk to him afterwards.

Besides, it's Cronenberg. It's almost oddly appropriate that it's Fabfunk talking to him.
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post #28 of 72
6/8/07 at 12:51pm
I don't really envy him. I mean, sure, it'd be cool to talk to Cronenberg and all, but I can't say it's any burning desire of mine.
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post #29 of 72
6/8/07 at 12:53pm
I'm not convinced Cronenberg isn't making a movie about fabfunk. Sexual fetishes, creepiness, disturbing subject matter, this is all vintage Cronenberg. Long live the new (er, dead) flesh!
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post #30 of 72
6/8/07 at 1:00pm
I'm not convinced he actually talked to Cronenburg. Fabfunk has a history of spewing outrageous bullshit.
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post #31 of 72
6/8/07 at 1:00pm
Fabfunk: I'm a huge fan of yours. Um, can I be the subject of your next movie? I have what my therapist calls severe sexual dysfunction. I prefer to say I'm Cronenbergesque. After all, I owe my love of fucking bloody gashes to you. Mostly.

David Cronenberg: No. Please step back.
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post #32 of 72
6/8/07 at 1:01pm
CAN'T STOP THE CUMMIN'
A film from David Cronenberg
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post #33 of 72
6/8/07 at 1:10pm
Elias Koteas is FABFUNK.
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post #34 of 72
6/8/07 at 1:24pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by BobClark
I'm not convinced he actually talked to Cronenburg. Fabfunk has a history of spewing outrageous bullshit.
If you were a Jew, I'd fucking dropkick you for that.
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post #35 of 72
6/8/07 at 1:40pm
What I wouldn't give for another thrilling action/adventure tale like this!

Quote:
Originally Posted by fabfunk
'm glad the audience reactions were not just in my theater, because I actually beat the shit out of an audience member afterwards. It was the worst theater experience I've ever had.

There was a row of clowns at the top row during my screening, making lewd, inappropriate remarks during the more uncomfortable scenes. I complained to theater management after telling them to "shut the fuck up" and then "shut the fuck up right now". After one of them said out loud that, "This shit was boring" I screamed out, "Shut the fuck up or fucking leave." He told me to come up and make him. Needless to say, my many visits to management did nothing but keep me from a large chunk of the film.

Afterwards, I found out it was three Hasidic Jews making these comments, and they were actually playing a shoot-em-up game in the lobby, which I thought was remarkably tasteless after that movie. I asked them if they were the ones making comments during the movie. They told me to fuck off and to kiss their ass and I told them never to come back to that theater again. They told me they'd be back tomorrow, so I told one of them to get to the parking lot.

It was a mano e mano, no weapons, and I took him down to the ground before smashing his face into the concrete as his friends watched on. I told him to never come back and I threw him into his car door.

Nobody fucks with Cronenberg, Gotta go see it again now.
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post #36 of 72
6/8/07 at 1:58pm
He also apparently has a history of violence.
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post #37 of 72
6/8/07 at 2:32pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by wadew1
What I wouldn't give for another thrilling action/adventure tale like this!
For some reason I thought he was being literal about the "row of clowns" making lewd comments for most of the story. Then when he said they were Hasidic Jews, my brain made a weird doubletake, trying to reconcile the image of three Hasidic Jewish clowns playing shoot-em-up games. Man, was that some good times.
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post #38 of 72
6/8/07 at 2:35pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattioli
If I had any assemblance of an idea of how to use Photoshop, or even the program itself, I would be all about an "I Am Fabfunk" poster a la the "I Am Legend" poster. Vampires, corpses, necrophilia... c'mon, it sells itself.
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post #39 of 72
6/8/07 at 2:40pm
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Litmus Configuration again.
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post #40 of 72
6/8/07 at 2:42pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Martin Savage
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Litmus Configuration again.
Seconded. Awesome stuff.
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post #41 of 72
6/8/07 at 2:42pm
Don't worry. I gave him some.
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post #42 of 72
6/8/07 at 2:45pm
As did I. Good job, Litmus.
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post #43 of 72
6/8/07 at 2:46pm
Ditto. Also, my reputation points are utterly, greyly worthless except as a vehicle for spreading my own unique brand of sunshine around.

Thanks, Litmus. Once again, you've come through in the clutch.
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post #44 of 72
6/8/07 at 2:47pm
Question: Why are people pissed Fabfunk met Cronenberg (if said meeting took place)?

Answer: Communicable diseases. Everyone wants Cronenberg healthy, and when Anthony Wong fucked a dead gorilla it started the Ebola Syndrome, so who's to say what all Fab has.
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post #45 of 72
6/8/07 at 3:02pm
I'm not pissed at Fabfunk.

With some luck he'll stop ghost-posting in the 2 threada he maintain alive since he "left", when Eric Bana comes exacting Vengeance for attacking the Jews.

EDIT: %?%* grammar...
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post #46 of 72
6/8/07 at 3:10pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alan "Nordling" Cerny
Don't worry. I gave him some.
As did I. Good stuff, Litmus!
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post #47 of 72
6/8/07 at 3:15pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Litmus Configuration
I have never felt sadder for the Warner Brothers logo. Or at least not since Kangaroo Jack.
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post #48 of 72
6/8/07 at 3:17pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andre Dellamorte
I have never felt sadder for the Warner Brothers logo. Or at least not since Kangaroo Jack.
Am I the only one that thinks Fabfunk looks like Joel Silver there?

(The sympathy for the WB logo would still apply, too.)
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post #49 of 72
6/8/07 at 3:22pm
He looks like Wednesday's boyfriend in Adams Family Values.
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post #50 of 72
6/8/07 at 3:34pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by juan23
He looks like Wednesday's boyfriend in Adams Family Values.
David Krumholtz wept.
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