Batman Forever vs. Batman and Robin - Page 2

I demand hard science in my summer blockbusters. Cold, hard science.

...and to think, he was just ONE DAY away from retirement.

True it doesn't have Jim Carrey, but the spirits of Adam West and Burt Ward have never been more alive.

I don't see the comparison. Batman Forever managed to be cheesy and still have a certain amount of entertainment value, which would therefore make it more like Adam West's Batman. Batman & Robin was just plain bad. So that might actually make it comparable to the third season of Adam West's Batman, but not the good stuff.

I think a much more interesting debate can be had discussing whom you would rather tap:
Debi Mazar or Drew Barrymore.

For me, the choice is simple: Make Mine Mazar.

Is it sick that if I ever had the opportunity to have sex with Drew Barrymore I'd want a lifesize replica of E.T. sitting in the bedroom in a sort of voyeur position? I think that qualifies as sick.

Funnily enough, when I fantasize about shagging Debi Mazar it's with a life size E.T. doll looking on.
Small world!

I think that turning either of them away would be the height of hubris. But then, I'm all about the buffet.

Say, that acid tosser looks like Kevin James! That bastard!

I was actually thinking he looks like a cross between Kevin James, and James Gandolfini. The combined name, of course, would be James James.

Forever ftw. The camp entertainment so many are finding in B&R oddly enough, I can get in Forever without the guilt. Besides, I still hold it as a shrine to the mysterious time when Nicole Kidman was still unbearably hot.

On that same note, I pick Barrymore. Despite the body, Mazar tends to look like she will matter-of-factly devour my head after mating.

Batman Forever is my favorite of the two.

C'mon it had John Glover as a wacko mad scientist in the deep jungle who then dies at the lips of Poison Ivy...

...and Dick Grayson fighting in a rave set alley.

Wait a second, it looks like the acid hit his entire face. I call Shenangins.

And the acid tosser looks like Kevin James with Paul Sorvino tendencies.

You're a fargin' corksucker!

<that's my Johnny Dangerously reference for the month>

Which movie had Batman's ears wiggle/jiggle/bobble more in the "slo-mo silhouette run toward the camera" endings? I must know.

Batman Forever's forced-pop-song soundtrack is better (or more memorable) as well, IMO. Nothing against B & R's Smashing Pumpkins or REM, but I happen to like U2's track and Seal brought something for... the ladies. Kiss From a Rose got a ton of radio play (not a measure of quality mind you, just popularity), plus I'm pretty sure that song on a mixtape got me laid in the mid-90's. I think taking a date to Batman and Robin insured me NOT getting laid.

Batman Forever= Winnah!

On the one hand, the fact that Batman goes to criminal trials in the batsuit and just hangs out is pretty awesome.

On the other hand WINTER COLD CHILL COOL FREEZE ICE WINTER FREEZE COLD COOLER CHILL ICE FREEZE

Upskirt shot of Nicole Prime.
Batman Forever wins it.

Although the psychology is pop fluff in "Forever", I think the film's willingness to examine who Bruce Wayne is, combined with Kilmer's committed take on the character places it above the fourth, at least. I mean, come on- "Take two of these and call me in the morning?"

Rebuttal: FREEZE COLD FREEZE CHILL WINTER COLD ICE FREEZE ICE COLD WINTER WINTER FREEZE ICE CHILL COOL FREEZE

What's awesome is that -ahem- GNN covered a mobster trial with a three camera setup and bothered to edit the footage into a neat little sequence for the nine o'clock news. Complete with slo-mo.

And Brad, sometimes you are a cold, cold man. Your dismissal of others gives me chills. It's like you chose to freeze people out.

When Batman goes into Dr. Chase Merridian's room in full costume and she says "I'm seeing someone"...what if she said "Yes, take me now"? Would he fuck her in his batsuit? Is there a little trap-door where his penis is? Does he have little bat-shaped condoms.

Double post, but while I'm here, Since when does Gotham have it's own statue of liberty?

It's a latex suit.

And speaking of latex suits, if Bruce Wayne spends a couple of hours every night fighting crime in that, won't he smell like a used condom all the time?

But does it has a reservoir tip?

It has two.

So that's what he has in that utility belt...

BATMAN FOREVER. The scene with her with only a bedsheet around her was like the PG-13 version of the FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH scene.

Then I saw her boobies three years later.

Don't forget the shark repellent. You never know when that might come in handy.

Every time, Batman & Robin shows up on television, I shake my head and say, "Yep, that's my governor."

I must say that I can't entirely hate a movie that has Mr. Freeze forcing his henchmen to sing along with the "Snow Miser" song.

When it comes to this debate, this cannot be ignored:



Gorilla. Striptease. Hilarity.

What the hell is that?!

Um, that's Bane in the gorilla suit. In fact, at the start of that abysmal and hilarious Charity Auction scene, both of them are in magenta gorilla outfits.

I just don't remember that. Probably a good thing.

Uma looks good, though. I think she's one of the few people cast in the previous versions that would still be an interesting choice in Nolan's universe playing the same role. While it's the same character, it would (obviously) be a completely different take on it.

Maybe I just really want to see Michelle Pfeiffer* back in the catwoman suit....

*Don't get me wrong, she was great in 'Returns'. I don't even know that I want to see a different version of catwoman than hers...

When you really think about it, one of the things that makes Batman & Robin even more of a hate crime against fan boys is the source material it totally squanders. Bane's big coming out party in the comics was sort of created for shock value, yes, but how do you go from cunning supervillain capable of breaking Batman's back to monosyllabic grunting tube guy? Also, it seems that a lot of the Mr. Freeze and Poison Ivy stuff was taken from the excellent animated series, including the updated tragic backstory for Freeze, an episode which won an Emmy back in the early 90's.

I don't see how B&R can lose with gag-inducing camp like that. The performances in that scene are aggressively awful.

Well, the notion that Schumacher gleefully concocted a "hate crime" is sort of the joke, isn't it? I like this review's take on the film:

Batman Forever is a deeply mediocre movie. Not particularly great action, dumbed down psychology from the Burton films, and cartooish performances across the board, with a pretty miserable script.

Batman and Robin joins the pantheon of truly awful films, like Night at the Lepus, and Over the Top. I saw it opening day and took a friend the next day (the second time I just walked in the theater without paying and no one noticed) and we walked out after 40 mintues. He was like:
"Nothing cuts, it makes no sense, it's all nonsense."
my response was "Yeah, it's kinda brilliant in that."
"Did they go into outer space, and surf home?"
"Yeah."
"How does that work?"
"I have no idea."

Any movie that actively, and repeated, abandons any relationship from reality that heavily, and then sticks a Von Sternberg homage in the middle leaves me pretty speechless. Therefore it wins.

If you want an even more outrageous example of people going into space and coming back to Earth without a problem in a comic book movie, check out Superman IV.

B&R vs. Superman IV? Now that's a tough one.

It's too bad B&R didn't use McBain's classic line, "Ice to see you." However, I can't get any enjoyment out of B&R. When people say George Lucas raped their childhood, this tripe wrecked my childhood when I was a child. I was mildly disappointed with Batman Forever as an eight year old, but nothing will top the sould-crushing experience that was Batman and Robin. I think it was the catalyst to my deep-seeded cynicism. They're both turds, but Batman and Robin takes it to the next level.

I think you need to visit the Goth Rock mixtape thread.

Or stop being a big baby.

Nothing "crypto" about it. Blatant, pure and simple.

Which one had the extreme close up of the rubber ass? Was it both?

Gotta say: Superman IV's worst sin is how monumentally boring it is. B&R is so terrible that I'm mildly interested in seeing it again in a rewatching-9/11-footage-over-and-over-again kind of way.

I think the review posted by Desslar gives B & R too much credit. Schumacher has a background grounded in musicals. That influence just bled into and finally took over B & R. The movie is a musical, a garish one at that, all it's missing are the songs.