DVD REVIEW: BLAZING SADDLES: SE

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IT AT AMAZON:
CLICK
HERE

STUDIO:
Warner Bros.

MSRP:
$19.98
RATED:
R

RUNNING
TIME:
93 minutes

SPECIAL FEATURES:
• Theatrical trailer(s)

All-new digital transfer and remastered Dolby 5.1
sound
• Scene-specific commentary by director/co-writer
Mel Brooks
• Cast/Crew Reunion documentary “Back in the
Saddle”
• Excerpt of “Intimate Protrait: Madeline Kahn
Remembered”
• “Black Bart” 1975 TV Pilot that inspired
the film
• Additional scenes

BUY IT! Please?

Discuss
this review RIGHT HERE on our message boards.

It’s
very easy to dismiss the Mel Brooks canon if
you grew up knowing him as they fellow who inflicted
Dracula: Dead and Loving It or
Robin Hood: Men in Tights on an
unsuspecting populace. That’s not Mel Brooks.
Nor is the recent Hollywood hard on for The
Producers
a fair barometer of the man’s
contributions to comedy.

Mel
Brooks is Young Frankenstein.
Mel Brooks is The History of the World,
Part One
. Mel Brooks, God bless him…
is Blazing Saddles. After a rather
lame snapper case offering that I and many people
like me gladly plunked down our dough for a
few years ago, Blazing Saddles
is celebrating its 30th anniversary
with a nicer, cleaner, and more respectful DVD
offering.

Is
this a classic in name alone or does the Mel
Brooks magic still hold up in its fourth decade
in existence?

The
Flick

It’s
nice to get a film to review now and then that
is all pleasure and no bullshit. Even the really
good films and shows demand you to peel back
the layers and find more than just the superficial
bells and whistles [though admittedly I tend
to not get too into the subtext because I’m
either dumb or don’t want to bore you]. Blazing
Saddles
has a load of depth, especially
for its time and while most of the jabs, zingers,
and social commentaries still ring true, there
are few comedies this pure and surprisingly
resonant. Comedies often have a short shelf
life, especially the ones that are too reliant
on sight gags or gross-out humor but this movie
juggles so many different kinds of gags both
clean, dirty, and just plain outrageous that
it’s like going to Napa Valley after a steady
diet of Ripple.


It
was the first time since college that Annette
had so many Johnsons lined up behind her.

For
the seven of you that aren’t familiar with Brooks’
[written with Andrew Bergman and Richard Pryor,
among others] classic, it’s the “new sheriff
in town” staple from the Western genre turned
on its ear. To further their political careers,
the villains of the piece played by comedy heavyweights
Brooks and Harvey Korman engineer the choice
of the new lawman in hopes of making the town
bend under their will. They choose a black man
(Cleavon Little, R.I.P.) who they’d previously
slated for hanging.

Today,
that’s not drama. That’s a page out of the newspaper.
Politicians are using any tool they can, including
choosing minorities just for the voting benefits
of saying they did rather than because that
person’s skills. It’s not comedy, though it
is comically transparent. In Blazing Saddles
it’s downright incendiary.


Back
in the day during the lulls in good theater,
Wild Westerners would recreate their favorite
moments from Brainscan.

Much
of the humor in the film comes from the fact
that the sheriff is black and that the townspeople
are shamelessly racist. I’d be lying if I said
it wasn’t refreshing to see such matters handled
without kid gloves on. The notorious N-Bomb
is dropped often and without fear, and some
of the film’s biggest jokes stem from it. The
reason it works is not only because the emphasis
of the joke is never demeaning towards the black
characters but also because it exposes not only
the true and boneheaded lunacy of racists and
their close-mindedness and Brooks and gang were
fully aware of the stigma of the word. Today,
the word is even more taboo. Aside from a few
people like Quentin Tarantino whose liberal
use of the word has angered folks like Spike
Lee [unfairly, in my opinion], the usage of
the word “nigger” is now tantamount to racism.
Blazing Saddles throws caution
to the wind and it’s timeless and hilarious.
George Carlin spoke about how even rape can
be funny, depending on what the focus of the
joke was. He couldn’t be more right. In the
right hands, just about anything can be funny
and something about a frail old woman delivering
that taboo word when you least expect it is
side-splittingly brilliant. Only Mel Brooks
would have a scene where a couple of Klansmen
are in line to join a hunting party to kill
the sheriff and his town and have a smiley face
and “have a nice day” on their backs.


“Wait,
I was told that by signing up for the militia
I’d be able to participate in Klandestine operations…”

It’s
crude stuff but it works like you wouldn’t believe.
I also am of the belief that it’s more respectful
toward a black audience than some recent lowest
common denominator comedies geared strictly
for a black audience.

Of
course, Blazing Saddles is hardly
just a receptacle for race commentary and humor.
It has visual gags of both the subtle and over-the-top
[Lincoln Hawk not included] variety. It has
Mel Brooks mugging for the camera in multiple
roles, Harvey Korman twisting his mustache at
a high rate of speed, and Gene Wilder at his
wild-haired and relaxed best. There’s Madeline
Kahn’s musical numbers (which have staled for
me though she is a goddess of comedy) and her
brilliant “It’s twue!” scene. It has Slim Pickens
doing what he does best. It has the then-potent
but now gratuitous campfire farting sequence.
It has the bizarre tonal shift in the last ten
minutes.

It
has a whole lot.


Sneakshit
makes sure the coast is clear before performing
his namesake act of intestinal ballet.

In
the pantheon of comedy, Blazing Saddles
is right up there with Monty Python and
the Holy Grail
, Annie Hall,
City Lights, Duck Soup,
The Big Lebowski, and Airplane
as one of the transcendent and ageless films
of all time. Insanely quotable, brave to the
point of controversy, and fueled by whip-sharp
writing and performances, Blazing Saddles
is nothing short of perfection.


Mel
Brooks’ Hellraiser spoof lacked
the ambition and the budget of his more memorable
comedies but still managed to succeed in France.

If
you’re eighteen years of age or younger and
haven’t seen Blazing Saddles,
you need to. It may not seem like much after
a steady diet of Farrelly films and American
Pie
efforts, but you’ll see why those
films exist and just maybe you’ll see why Mel
Brooks is something truly special.

If
you’re sixteen years of age or younger and are
female, email dave@chud.com.


“Stand
back Jerry. For once I’m gonna handle this erection
all by my lonesome!”

9.3
out of 10


“Mr.
Bacon, I believe you’re hired.”

The
Look

The
first DVD of this film looked only slightly
better than the career of Patrick Muldoon, so
it’s good to see that the new edition got a
more deserving and high quality presentation.
It’s weird to see this film so crisp. After
decades of fullscreen television and VHS viewings,
it’s like seeing the film for the first time.
There are scratches and little imperfections
from time to time but this is still a hearty
transfer. The film is very Earthen in tone and
like many Westerns from that time period it
has that look that’s both timeless and restricted
in palette. The resulting image is very brown
and tan without much variance but also crystal
clear. For some reason the film seems older
now. It seems like an OLD MOVIE.

Either
way, it’s a nice transfer.

8.0
out of 10


“Wait, didn’t I make it perfectly clear
that I wanted the younger, thinner model of
Jeff Lebowski? That’s the last time I let you
purchase gentlemen off the Internet.”

The
Noise

This
isn’t a film whose audio presentation is going
to rotate your buttons, even when it’s cranked
up on your surround set (though you can now
hear campfire farts coming from all directions
if that’s among your lifelong wishes). It just
isn’t.

It’s
presented in Dolby 5.1 and it all comes through
just fine but you just can’t weave gold from
burlap.

7.0
out of 10


“I figured I’d just chill out here until
Ash and Bobbie Joe got back.”

The
Goodies

I was jazzed
when I heard that they were doing a special
edition of that film. Scratch that, I was more
than Jazzed. I was Wheeljacked.

Sadly,
the special features aren’t nearly what you’d
expect for a film as beloved as this from the
same studio that brought us amazing editions
of other catalog titles like Amadeus,
Unforgiven, and Casablanca.


It was a shame that they cancelled Landing
Strip Sally and The Newspaper Reading Lamp

before the show had a chance to spread its wings
and fly.

There’s
a commentary track by Brooks himself, which
is a definite upgrade over the weird 30 minute
monologue that played over the film on the first
disc. Still, it’s not scene specific and for
every vignette (it’s obvious that Richard Pryor
wasn’t the most reliable guy in the world back
then) there’s a lot of silence and moments where
Brooks is just talking about the people he was
writing with. It’s not as compelling as you’d
expect from a true master. It does have its
moments, but Brooks obviously hasn’t listened
to a lot of commentary tracks.

His
tracks tend to be a little stale, something
that is surprisingly evident in a lot of comedies.
Hilarious films coupled with benign commentary
tracks. I guess it’s logical. How do you compete?

There’s
also an unearthed gem of sorts in Black Bart,
the thirty minute television pilot (starring
the Enemy Mine himself, Lou Gossett!)
that Bregman created that evolved from Blazing
Saddles
. It seems as if it were done
BEFORE the film though, because some of the
characters are so thinly drawn that the show
feels like a sketch. But, it apparently wasn’t.

It’s
no surprise that the show never made it to the
television with its racial slurs and rather
offensive attempts at humor. It’s fun to see
some familiar faces (Noble Willingham and C.H.U.D.
II
‘s Gerritt Graham) but the ultimate
result is a television pilot that was grounded
for a good reason.

There’s
a brief but loving Madeline Kahn tribute (how
she dies and Margot Kidder lives is beyond me)
and a rather nice little retrospective documentary
that runs just under thirty minutes that showcases
the madcap creation of the film but is mostly
interesting because it shows a handful of deleted
scenes, some of which that are quite good and
because it shows just how old some of these
people have become. It’s really nice to see
Harvey Korman, especially. I’ve seen next to
no behind-the-scenes stuff from him and it’s
refreshing.

The
deleted scenes are also available separately,
should you want to view them that way.

It’s
a decent but unremarkable special edition in
the long run, however.

6.5
out of 10

BUY IT! Please?The
Artwork

It’s
the cover art, so you cannot go wrong. Plus,
it’s not a snapper case, a fact which warms
the heart, pants, and midriff in glorious fashion.

Thirty
years old. That’s incredible. It seems like
yesterday that my father was introducing it
to me as a kid of 6 or 7 back in the late 70’s.

Buy
this thing.

8.0
out of 10

THE
FLICK: 9.3
THE LOOK: 8.0
THE NOISE: 7.0
THE GOODIES: 6.5

THE ARTWORK: 8.0
OVERALL: 9.0






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DVD REVIEW: TORQUE

Buy me!BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!
STUDIO: Warner Bros.
MSRP: $27.98 RATED: PG-13
RUNNING TIME: 84 Minutes
SPECIAL FEATURES:
• Audio Commentaries
• Documentaries
• Music Video
• Animatics
• Deleted Scenes

Perhaps
the most legendary arbiter of torment and torture
during the Spanish Inquisition was known as
Torquemada (Torque to his pals). Torment. Torture.
Torque. Could it all come together
in one violent and intrusive bundle of digital
dickslam? Read on…

Twisting
force, my ass.

The
Flick


Though
not as intimidating as Bone-Eater McDaniel or
Terror Shrimp, The Red Shitter was no pushover
in the super villain sweepstakes.

I
made the mistake of blinking during Torque‘s
theatrical run and therefore had to cool my
jets until the film was massaged into a round
I Come in Peace weapon to discover
if it was fast and furious or just plain racist
towards me. From the advertisements, it looked
like the latest adrenaline fueled music video
set on wheels with a cast of unmemorable talent
set to lame music and edited to the point of
sending epileptics off to a twitching early
grave.

Thankfully,
it’s all of those things.


After
the ADR budget ran out, the filmmakers were
forced to seek other means of getting the dialogue
taken care of.

When
I say that Torque is the most
shamelessly synthetic and overstylized action
flick ever made I mean it in the nicest way
possible. This film makes cheese blush. It gives
bullet time lead poisoning. From the first computer
assisted race sequence to the climactic Chop-Kawasaki
and Mach 48373 race through the city, Torque
revels in excess in ways that would resurrect
Don Simpson and eject him from his grave in
slow motion as doves gather and carry him to
the surface of Venus where he is pelted with
little rocks shaped like Jerry Bruckheimer’s
night terrors. As the film unfolded I seriously
found myself falling in love with its utter
fakeness and bold arrogance. You know the kind
of love I’m referring to. The love an inmate
finds after cell blocks B and C ventilate his
colon enough so that he forgets what it was
like before the whistling sound began to waft
from his drawers twenty-four hours a day. Before
his ass had its own climate. Torque
is that rough lover, the one who punches you
in the eyes when he/she is happy and does spinning
monkey kicks to your coccyx when he/she feels
melancholy. This film has the Goodyear blimp
testicles to recreate a quote from The
Fast and the Furious
(also produced
by Neal Moritz, one of this film’s many Summerian
summoners) and then scoff at it.

It
scoffs at The Fast and the Furious,
a film that not only made this film possible
but one that looks like a Cassavettes flick
in comparison. Let that sink in. I’ll wait.

This
film slapped me so many times, I became Faye
Dunaway.

"I
hate it. I love it. I hate it. I love it. Why
did John Huston throw me the business? I love
it. I hate it." These were the words drifting
from my locked room as I experienced the twisting
force.


"Doctor,
I might be coming down with something. I have
this metallic taste in my mouth. And my nose."

The
film has an intricate and multi-layered plot
involving motorcycles. In fact, there’s also
some people who ride on them, something I believe
which suggests an almost biblical beast of burden
dual meaning but I’d have to consult the Kama
Sutra
and John Grisham’s The Client
to be sure. The characters have easy to remember
names like Ford, Dalton, Shane, Nina, and Val
and it’s good because the subtext being hurled
at my jaws at 3000 rpm kept me from keeping
track. The filmmakers (led by director/holocaust
Joseph Kahn) threw my psyche into an uproar
when they had the gall to toss in a character
named Henry James. Two names. One person. Thank
God for Advil.

I
think I figured it out after a few viewings
though, like 2001: A Space Odyssey.
The monolith of Torque is Martin
Henderson and by that I mean he ought to be
trapped in the vacuum of space.


"Looks
like Martin’s back on the menu, boys!"


Henderson
comes from the same vault in central casting
that brought us Scott Speedman. They’re good
looking fellows who are like a living placebo
tossed in between actors. They can recite lines,
look good on camera, but there’s obviously some
foul play at hand. Perhaps he hasn’t gotten
the role that proves his worth, but I spent
much of Torque‘s idling time (see
that’s a little motorcycle terminology) not
only not caring if his character lived, died,
or was sold as the cure for arthritis but wondering
if I was actually alive myself. Honestly, I
won’t be surprised at all if I finish this review
and upload it onto the server and then realize
I’m actually an energy maggot on Neptune’s hidden
moon having a lucid dream. Martin Henderson
2: On the Move
.

All
of the film’s stars left me looking into the
abyss and hoping it was looking back at me.
In fact, I now secretly harbor a desire for
the abyss to not only look back at me, but invite
me in. Monet Mazur is a very pretty woman who
looks very good on camera and using a motorcycle
to conduct ninja assaults, but I couldn’t find
myself believing that she could love Martin
Henderson’s character more than a freshly popped
Mountain Dew. Ice Cube has more scowls than
Eskimos have terms for snow, but it seems the
promise of Three Kings has been
replaced with a sign that says "Out For
Lunch. Will Be Back in Five Films". Christina
Milan? Of her six minutes of screen time I deduced
that she has a bright future ahead of her, provided
nuclear warheads explode constantly within her
line of sight. Adam Scott plays one of two FBI
agents that ride around in a Hummer looking
for bikers to bust and though I doubt Sam &
Twitch t-shirts aren’t standard issue, the biggest
arc his character had was when he remembered
to pay for gas. Jaime Pressly had a surprisingly
tiny amount of screen time considering she’s
actually one of the more veteran members of
the cast, and though she was sexy as she’s ever
been all gussied up as a queen bitch I found
it hard to believe she could hold her own in
Torque‘s Ninja Bike Combat™
segment. I’ve seen people race around and kick
each other with motorcycles and they look nothing
like the star of Ticker.


…and
it was then that Daniel realized why he was
voted ‘Most Likely to Explode Amongst Parts"
in his high school yearbook.

The
brilliance of Torque

Sorry,
had to take a break there. Scientists just knocked
on my door and handed me an award for being
the 16,000th person to start a sentence with
"The brilliance of Torque"…
is that it doesn’t nudge against the concept
of taking the genre and bending it a little,
it fires a pulse weapon at the concept to loosen
it up and then drives a stretch M-1 Abrams tanks
through it while guzzling champagne and eating
truffles mined from the back of Rudy Ray Moore.
It’s so over the top that it’s hard not to just
give in after about a half hour of utterly ludicrous
behavior and have fun with it. The acting doesn’t
matter, the fact that Kahn has the attention
span of a nematode in a triple espresso petri
dish doesn’t matter.

Nothing
matters except the wretched excess of the twisting
force.


"Maximillian…
I thought you died on the Cygnus with
Dr. Reinhardt."


I
find Torque to represent all that
is unholy in the film business. If it were enrolled
in the school of style over substance, it’d
be the one with the automatic weapon. Zooms
give birth to computer generated internal cross
sections which give birth to whip pans to speeding
racers which smash cut to computer assisted
shots of people whisking past each other which
give birth to impossible shots 200 feet in the
sky which gives birth to the It’s Alive
baby, teeth bared for hatred. Everything is
wrong, from the silly train chase sequence to
the 200mph duels that defy the laws of physics,
gravity, and Jude. This is the only film with
extreme sports that no kid would ever try at
home and thusly not require a disclaimer. Evel
Kneivel would see this and piss his starry jumpsuit.

It’s
this fearless determination to rule the looney
bin that makes Torque a special
film. They knew what they were doing. It was
evil, but I can’t fault them for going forward
with their fiendish scheme. It’s the best worst
movie you might see this year. It’s like a milkshake
filled with Drano. It’ll taste great going in
but it’ll victimize your throat, lungs, stomach,
and rectum like nobody’s business.

Except
Martin Henderson and his twisting force.



Though he grew his hair out in the winter Brian
could never fully conceal his Sleestak noggin.

I
love this movie. I hate this movie.

0.0
out of 10/10 out of 10


Kane
McBlur unknowingly becomes member #49,489 of
THE NATION’S PUNCHED™.

The
Look

Torque
has an agenda that involves the savage and uninterrupted
mutilation of your soul, and I’m proud to say
that this widescreen transfer does so in a way
that allows the process to happen without a
hitch. The last thoughts that will enter your
mind before you are a faceless automaton with
a yellow leather jumpsuit is "This film
looks good…".

You
will then lose bodily control and soil yourself
and everyone you’ve ever loved but it won’t
be because Warner Bros. delivered a shoddy transfer.
This looks nice, you frigging robot.

9.0
out of 10


"OK, repeat the part about the Body Thetans…"

The
Noise

In
addition to incinerating your eyes with the
greatest of ease, the DVD of Torque
has no worries in recreating Stallone’s Copland
aural canals in your own living room on your
own living head. The 5.1 Dolby track has the
subtlety of the 2nd fully functional Death Star
and whether it’s the cathartic Satanic purr
of the film’s numerous crotch rockets or the
shafty song du jour in the film’s jukebox of
sorrows, everything comes through with flying
colors. Not unlike a Technicolor yawn.

Good
work, though. It booms and it blams and it makes
the couch quiver. Just like mom.

9.0
out of 10



"Yeah, I’m here to audition for The
Adventures of Young Kurt Russell
."

The
Goodies

I’d have paid
an easy two-hundred bucks for this DVD if it
featured three commentary tracks featuring Joseph
Kahn apologizing in every known language including
Sign.
Sadly,
there are only two tracks of him apologizing,
but he does it in a really subtle way. He does
it by talking about the movie.

I
swear, if I listened to these commentary tracks
and discovered that Kahn took this film seriously
I would have demanded his and my knees be transplanted.
Thankfully, he knows exactly what he’s done
and probably going to Hell for and I found it
to be quite fun. There’s a cast commentary where
Kahn sits in with his bikers and I liked it,
though the overall impact is lessened by so
many people that it becomes impossible to tell
who’s who and who’s currently hosting Azazel.
Still, it’s a really fun track and it put my
mind at ease that Torque was actually
a fun film and not a weapon of mass destruction.

The
second track features Kahn apologizing through
the explanation of how the film was made. It’s
a lot more technical but an apology nonetheless.

Additionally,
there are some animatics which illustrate/apologize
how a few of the scenes were done/inflicted
from the animatic stage all the way through
finished and rendered final products. It’s pretty
neat, though some of the finished effects are
about as convincing as a luggage rack cooking
me dinner.

Most
importantly, there’s a video by Youngbloodz.
I think you’ll all agree that it’s that feature
that escalates this DVD from "Must Purchase"
to "Must Worship".

7.5
out of 10

The
Torque Guide to Subtle Filmmaking: Reflections


Shooting
in a mirror is cool and represents the duality
of man.



No,
really.



Objects
from Crazy/Beautiful are larger
than they appear.



Another
neat trick: Making it appear an actor is kissing
his girl as she frolics in General Zod’s prison.



This
represents the duality of man and also suggests
that man too might have a toothpick, screwdriver,
and compass hidden in his ass.

The
Artwork

The
artwork is very similar to the original one-sheet,
except this version doesn’t have a cryptic mind
control element begging you to punish your loved
ones hidden within.

It’s
eye-catching, shows off its attractive cast,
and features a nice motion blurred glimpse at
two people conducting the centuries old martial
art involving only inner peace and a Japanese
motorbike.

7.0
out of 10

Overall: .005 or 10 out of 10






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