You know what I think when I see a cast of Dennis Quaid, Tyrese Gibson, Jon Tenney, Charles S. Dutton, Lucas Black, Kate Walsh, Adrianne Palicki, Kevin Durand and Willa Holland? Savings! And when I think cost-conscious thrillers, I think Screen Gems!
Despite that preponderance of below-the-title, maybe even off-the-poster talent, I’m actually looking forward to Legion, which marks the writing/directing feature debut of The Orphanage’s Scott Stewart. We know and love The Orphanage for their nifty visual effects work on Bong Joon-ho’s brilliant The Host, and while a mere association with that lovely film does not equate greatness, I’m smitten enough to pretend it does. Logic doesn’t much enter into my life, and I intend to keep it that way.
Stewart’s film stars Paul Bettany (good and affordable) as the archangel Michael, who takes up for humanity after God gives up on us sinners. I’m not entirely sure how the narrative works, but I believe Michael is charged with protecting a group of humans who must, in turn, protect a woman carrying the second-coming of Jesus Christ. Looking over the above-listed female talent, I’m having trouble buying Kate Walsh, Adrianne Palicki or Willa Holland as virginal, so I’m going to assume they’re taking a page out of the Book of Junior and having “Roc” Dutton shit out Our Savior. At least, that’s how I’d write it.
Legion will commence principal photography shortly in New Mexico (yep), and should be ready for release sometime in 2009.
9 comments
You're all gonna die. The only question is how you check out. Do you want it on your feet? Or on your fuckin' knees… begging? I ain't much for begging! Nobody ever gave me nothing! So I say *fuck* that thing! Let's fight it!
Maybe Jesus will be born from the belly of a Gorilla? They will marvel at the birth of the second coming of Christ only to have Jesus spit some mad knowledge at them about how NOW he is born from gorillas, so humans are now considered animals, completely fucking up the argument over evolution vs. creationism. We came from gorillas, but we didn't evolve from them, AND they are superior to us in every way. Turns out sitting around scratching your ass and eating bananas is actually the pathway to heaven. Paul Bettany would make a great gorilla and Danny Devito would play Christ, of course
I really don't give a shit about coming attractions. However, I always have to click onto your stuff, Beaks. In even the most mundane articles, you bring the flavor. Hyperbole aside, you're perhaps, the best writer on the web. It's appreciated.
It's true. Beaks, you deliver the goods.
yes I agree, in fact, if I had the chance I would blow you and swallow too Beaks.
So this is basically a re-imagining of Cyborg?
Sounds like a cross between Cyborg and The Prophecy II.
Jeremy is REALLY good writer! Devin, not so much.
sorry for the repeated use of alien 3 references, but how cool would it be if jesus was born in the fashion of a xenomorph? c'mon, a baby jesus bursting through an ox. symbolic? i think so!!! that would be awesome.
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