Zoolander‘s
not a very good movie, but it features a terrific comedic performance
from Owen Wilson and Billy Zane being the coolest bald thing this side
of Ted William’s prick. It’s not horrible either. It just is. Derek Zoolander is a one-note character, that’s all.
The oft-discussed sequel always seemed like a bit of vaporware until various careers need a boost of gas but apparently (if you believe Nikki Finke) it’s going to happen sooner rather than later.
“Paramount and Ben Stiller are pulling together a PG-13 Zoolander 2 with Tropic Thunder and Iron Man 2 writer Justin Theroux who’ll also direct.” sez Finke. Here’s what I know about Theroux. He’s got powerful friends and he’s ripped as shit in the Charlie’s Angels movie.
Finke threatens that Jonah Hill will be possibly be the villain of the piece, replacing Will Ferrell. Someone needs to get Jonah to stretch a new muscle onscreen, because currently I’ve seen one muscle stretched and I need to see something new.
That said, if they were to make a movie about the coal-mining portion of the Zoolander family with Jon Voight [edit: I had Christopher Walken because he’s also Voighty in appearance] and Vince Vaughn reprising their roles, that’s a movie worth getting excited about.
20 comments
Jon Voight, not Christopher Walken. You're slipping, Nick.
Don't you mean Jon Voight, the poor man's Walken, reprising his role.
""Paramount and Ben Stiller are pulling together a PG-13 Zoolander 2…"—–The first one was PG-13 also. Why did Finke feel that this was even worth noting?
Justin Theroux is so hot right now.
I still find it mildly astonishing that the guy who played the douchebag Director character in Mulholland Drive is suddenly one of the hottest screenwriters in Hollywood. Absurd.
Another correction, Nick: Zoolander was fucking awesome. But yeah, not awesome: Jonah Hill. Fuck that dude, the essence of over staying your welcome. Most I ever laughed at him was in that weird cameo in 40-Year-Old Virgin. It's been downhill from there.
Wasn't Brüno basically a better, funnier and more interesting Zoolander?
@7: No.
You know it's the truth. Unfunny people should not criticize any comedy, ever. Even if it's a hacky guy like Dane Cook, Nick should never say anything about hi, because Nick has proven time and again he has ZERO facility for humor.
Theroux was also in American Psycho and loves doing coke in bathroom stalls with Patrick Bateman.
This COULD be funny, but only if…
Hard R. Anorexic vagina jokes. Kill Jonah.
Comment #9 is right. Not only is nick not funny he hates comedy so much he continues to dry fuck comedy right up its ass on this very site practically every day. He does not care if comedy's ass is bleeding he just keeps on fucking and makes us watch as he drills away. Other than that bigfan!
I dunno, man, Jonah doesn't look like he's stretched even one muscle for a long, long time!
Maybe when Ben Stiller sees 11 Colonels Attack he'll realize the error of his ways and start playing more characters called Centaur Jones or Coccyx McPissrape.
"This side of Ted Williams prick." I think the Nunz should donate his brain to science.
How do you dry fuck something in the ass? Surely there's moisture up there?
Zoolander is NOT very good??? Man, Nick DOES have terrible taste.
Hey Nick, ask Devin STRAIGHT UP if he thinks you're funnier than Zoolander. Notice how he always keeps silent about such things because he knows you're not funny? I'm sure he likes you as a person and as a friend, but he knows the truth. Nick is comedy cancer.
i was really hoping that this story was going to be about a vikings vs aliens sequel to Outlander. oh well.
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