Piranha 3-D was a blast. One of my favorite theater experiences of the year. Twice. I paid to see Piranha 3-D twice .If there’s any further evidence needed after this: a jaded guy who has seen his best years as an online writer pass him by who sees most everything for free STILL paid to see this 3-D film twice… I don’t know what to tell you.
I would have been pleased as punch (dumb saying but here I am using it) if Alexandre Aja would make a Piranha film every three years and in the interim indulge whatever depraved fantasies his mind could cook up, but it apparently isn’t meant to be.
As reported by Deadline (one of two sites who get all the scoops), the powers that be at Dimension have hired the fun John “Feast” Gulager to direct the sequel that is aiming for a release late summer next year. That’s fine. Gulager’s heart is in the right place, having proven he likes gore and breasts as much as the next guy. He has some skill. Not a horrible choice. Not Aja, but not a horrible choice.
But they’ve also hired the writing tandem of Patrick Melton and Marcus Dustan, who aside from the Feast trilogy wrote the last four Saw abortions and the extremely shitty The Collector (Which I gave a balloon out of ten in my Movie Microscope). That’s bad, because though they seemed like nice chaps on Project: Greenlight they have pretty much proven that they aren’t concerned with contributing to things being better in the universe, let alone have the moxie to up the destruction ante in this fishy epic.
They need to bring Nicotero back. And keep with the giant prehistoric piranha motif the last film ended on. That’s a start towards gaining my trust and as you all know: My opinion carries serious weight in Hollywood*.
* Zero weight.
16 comments
I loved the "Feast" edition of "Project: Greenlight", and the buzz around the film had me really interested in seeing it, but I think the film itself was ass. That said, it was a nice first try, and I'd still like to see what Gulager can do outside of the "Feast" franchise, as he's the closest thing to a success story to ever come out of that show. Hell, they should resurrect "Project: Greenlight" for the purpose of covering the making of "Piranha 2". The Weinsteins could certainly use the money.
I actually enjoyed The Collector quite a bit. It's way better than any of the Saw films and infinitely cooler than Piranha 3D. Speaking of Piranha 3D, it ranks right up there with Clash of the Titans as some of the shittiest 3D ever slapped on a movie. By the end I was getting a headache it was so blurry. Look, Piranha is fun in a let's get drunk and go see a retarded ass flick kind of way, but I'll never watch it again. Im my opinion, Aja's only really good horror film has been The Hills Have Eyes.
I enjoyed this film myself, but how on earth are they able to justify a sequel? This bombed terribly.
"a jaded guy who has seen his best years as an online writer pass him by" – give yourself a little more credit, sir nick. you're reviews are as sharp as ever
This is going to be a DTV release, right?
@#4: That last line might be more flattering/complimentary if there wasn't a fuck-headed typo in it. And yeah, this was a dumb movie of variable mileage. I honestly think there should be special "B-Movie" pricing for shit like this. NOT worth a full ticket price, but maybe half?
Reading the first paragraph I thought I sent my article to the wrong site.
have you guys seen Feast 2 and 3? It's sort of like the opposite of Snapple. The worst stuff on earth.
I don't know if they were joking but Deadline called the sequel Piranha 3 DD.
Not sure if this will turn out good, but it's good to see Aja not getting caught in a sequel trap. I wanna see that Space Adventure Cobra thing he's got planned.
PIRANHA 3D was alright, but not that great. The post conversion 3D really didn't help it out either.
I liked watching Project: Greenlight far more than I did FEAST, but Gulager still interests me as a director. Guess we'll see Clu in the sequel.
This movie needs Chris Klein reprising the irrepressible Charlie Nash, Interpol.
Piranha 3d was ok. It was not the second coming like it was pimped on this site. You would have to be a inbred mouth breather of Georgian ancestory to actually pay to see it twice. Then again if you live in hillbilly country there aint a lot to do.
@#3 Michael: $24 M budget + $65 M worldwide gross = win. Soon you can add dvd/blu rentals + dvd/blu purchases + on demand, and that will eventually = bigger win. @Nick Nunziata & CHUD: thx for killing the verification system again. Hopefully you'll find one that works for all browsers soon.
I gotta say that I loved all the Feast movies. Sure, they looked atrocious and were festering piles of dog doo in every sense of good filmic taste, but they had a sense of lunacy that I thought was excellent. I even want another one since the surprise ending of the last one left me with a giant wad of WTF in my mouth.
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