Trying to keep up with this whole Charlie Sheen quagmire is almost a full-time job. And it’s one for which I’ve only occasionally shown up because, dude, it’s just way too crazy. Last I heard, Sheen was a warlock who’s going to save Haiti or something with Sean Penn. He’s been on every show, website, and even sports talk radio. I’ve heard that he’s passed drug tests, but then again he’s dropped over 20 pounds in the last month or so. Sometimes he’s manic, others he’s calm and (reasonably) cogent in his statements. Personally, I’m just waiting for him to walk into a biker bar, beat the shit out of everybody and then burn the damn thing down.
Considering the war of words and threatened legal action between Sheen and his meal ticket, Two and a Half Men, it seemed inevitable that the only thing Warner Bros. TV could do is can him. And now they have officially: “After careful consideration, Warner Bros. Television has terminated Charlie Sheen’s services on Two and a Half Men effective immediately,” Warner Bros Television said in a statement Monday. Sheen has recently fired back, though. Reached by TMZ, Sheen said: “This is very good news. They continue to be in breach, like so many whales. It is a big day of gladness at the Sober Valley Lodge because now I can take all of the bazillions, never have to look at whatshiscock again and I never have to put on those silly shirts for as long as this warlock exists in the terrestrial dimension.”
So there you have it. This is a continually developing story and the source article has already been updated a couple of times since I started this one, with a follow up concerning the legal reasons CBS and Warner Bros. went with concerning Sheen’s termination: that he has engaged in “moral terpitude.” Anyway, what’s going to happen to 2.5 Men is anybody’s guess at this point. But considering it’s the #1 comedy with nearly 15 million viewers weekly, it wouldn’t be a stretch to think that CBS and Warner Bros. would try anything to salvage it. As for Sheen, he’s probably going to have his hands full with pending legal action from the Wicca Community.
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A friend of mine told me on Friday that an actor buddy of his in LA was called in to audition for “a lead role” in Two And A Half Men. He didn’t get any more details than that. But I smell a Three’s Company “Chrissy/Cindy” cousin thing a-brewin’…
The sad reality of off this is what caused him to get fired. It wasn’t the years of known drug abuse,or beating up his wife and multiple times threatening her life. It was when he started in on one of the Producers of the show and his criticism of Warner Brothers that got him canned.
Considering two and a half men is basically the Charlie Sheen show, they need someone just as crazy to fill his boots. Mel Gibson would be my choice.
If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.
Oh no – how will this affect the quality of the show??? Oh wait, that’s right. The show sucks and it’s one of the true mysteries of the universe as to how it has survived this long. For the record, I hope we discover that Charlie Sheen has been 100% drug-free. That would mean that he is simply off-the-wall batshit insane. Or is he? Dude makes some sense at times, ya know? Either way, his meltdown is better than any of the shit on CBS. They are just pissed they did not follow him around with a camera 24/7. That would have been deep-fried gold.
GET JOE ESTEVEZ ON THE PHONE ALREADY.
Time to call Emilio. Mighty Ducks are no more. And he can play the brother. This shit writes itself.
(Sighs). Ah, Charlie. Why couldn’t you have just assaulted a Christmas tree like Kiefer Sutherland did when he was drunk. That was too funny to end with him fired from 24.
Rob Lowe? Or is he too legit these days….
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