A teaser trailer from Marcus Pathfinder Nispel’s much “anticipated” Conan the Barbarian adaptation, starring monster islander Jason Momoa, has arrived. Woot. I don’t know that anyone around here ever assumed the movie would be any good, but being realistic, we’re probably all going to end up seeing it (if only on DVD/Blu-ray). I guess that technically qualifies as “interest.” I love Conan the character, and adore the John Milius film (I don’t care that it isn’t the most faithful rendition of the Cimmerian).
This teaser is a white hot turd though. It could be hyping a television series. None of the footage we’re teased looks cool or even intriguing, and that projected-on-smoke gimmick doesn’t come off as awesome as I’m sure they thought it did. So far Momoa (he sounds like a beverage they’d serve at Island’s burger chain) and this film are shaping up about how I expected. Poorly.
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Preach it Joshua. Of course we are going to see this film at some point this year, if only it had a teaser trailer worth a shit to guarantee that people actually see it in the theatre.
With you all the way, Joshua. I love the Howard stories, I love the Savage Sword comics, I love the character. And even though Schwarzenegger’s films didn’t have a lot in common with the source material, when people hear “Conan” they immediately think Arnold, and rightfully so. He owns those movies.
The “I live, I love, I slay, I am content” line is actually from “Queen of the Black Coast” (originally published in 1934), which is a nice nod to the source material, and I’m really rooting for Momoa, who looks more like the Conan described in the stories than Schwarzenegger.
But the fact remains that this looks more like a PowerPoint presentation than a trailer, and that’s just not going to cut it. They really need to sell the public on the look and feel of this movie to differentiate it from the legacy it’s going to be up against.
Thank God some news broke that’s at least interesting. This place has been slow as shit lately. This trailer sucks, by the way.
Wow, this trailer did really suck. I might see this new movie, on dvd or tv at some point, but isn’t the idea of a teaser trailer to get people excited?
I think even with the Schwartzenegger film being only _very_ loosely tied to the original stories, it was still a great film. I mean, James Earl Jones turns into a giant freakin’ snake! And Arnie really did turn that role into his own.
I just got a nice big collection of Conan stories and intend to read it over spring break.
Not even getting Christian Bale to do his Batman voice for the voice-over could help that trailer. We’re in for a shit rape.
The teaser gives me no indication of the film’s actual quality whatsoever. Nothing here to tell me if it’s gonna suck or not because it’s an awful and lazy teaser.
Having said that, it’s a horrible way to promote a film that the fanboys have already written off.
The idea is to convince the naysayers they’re wrong. All this does is add fuel to the fire.
I’m just gonna pretend I didn’t see this and wait for a proper trailer. If that fails to entice me…well, there’s always the original flick to fall back on.
Momoa always looks like a tanned, pissed-off Gremlin with a unibrow in these shots. I really hope this turns out to be watchable, even if it’s not an interpretation of Conan that everyone who loves the first film or the books can get behind. This does not bode well that they seem afraid to show any proper footage.
Yeah, this does nothing to get me excited, but I liked the poster a lot.
http://www.impawards.com/2011/conan.html
For anybody that missed it.
At least they could have reused a little of the score or something. Conan doesn’t seem Conan without Poledouris’s banging drums and horns. Can I hear some “Anvil of Crom”?
Well, it’s hardly a trailer just a taster – and it looks fine to me. They’re going for PG-13 which is disappointing, but I know if I was 13 and I saw that I’d be totally pumped for it.
Yeah, this does not inspire confidence.
I reserve judgment until the movie comes out, but until then the best things in life are still to crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.
And a rousing score by Basil Paledouris.
I’ve read all the original Howard stories, and I have to say they’re a bit… lacking… in comparison to the Milius version.
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