“Maybe single people eat crackers. We don’t know. Frankly, we don’t want to know.”
One of my favorite Simpsons lines from one of my favorite episodes. And in a roundabout way it’s quite similar to my apathy towards Peter Berg’s upcoming board game fable: Battleship. Maybe there are aliens that land in the ocean and challenge our Navy to high-seas fisticuffs with some old-fashioned battleships. But just writing that last sentence was exhausting, and I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that this film exists. The last Iowa-class battleship was decommissioned in 1992, so it’s safe to expect a script that does some cartwheels in order to mine plausibility out of the situation*, however remote a prospect that is. All brought on by the licensing rights of a board game with not an alien in sight.
So it’s aliens who seemingly have an aversion to land mass versus old ships that we haven’t used in war time in two decades. And no one thought to make this a period piece?
Oh yeah, the new international poster is out. Enjoy!
*Naval games!
Source: IMP Awards





8 comments
It’s Peter Berg. He gets the benefit of the doubt for life from me because of Very Bad Things, Friday Night Lights and The Rundown.
Yeah. But then he made Battleship aka ‘Transformers 4: Watersports’.
Clever. Still curious to see how bad it sucks.
Tim Kelly, The poster for Battleship is…Awesome! I cannot wait to see this film. A Few Important Words…Liam Neeson is…Admiral Shane! Nuff Said!
Don’t ever change, Duke. Don’t you ever fucking change, my friend.
Duke you are my hero
Duke channels Stan Lee?!? I love it! Once again, I’ll hold judgement, but I’m… just… not… terribly interested in this film.
QuintProQuo, Of course! I started reading Marvel Comics in…1975! Stan Lee used to introduce such…MARVELous Superhero Cartoons like…Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends!
McGreedyRises, I am…honored by what you say.
Tim Kelly, I will only Change…My Clothes!
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