It looks like Paramount is taking a page from the Warner Bros/Zack Snyder playbook and taking 20 minutes of their new Star Trek prebootquel to the journalistic masses. The first stop was London (next is New York – not sure if it’s coming to LA or if my noisy agnosticism about the film is keeping me out of the screening!) and the good people at Empire Magazine saw it and loved it.
They go into very serious detail about the four clips shown, which are pretty spoilery and give you a good sense of what this movie will be like – full of action and horrible dialogue. Examples:
Scotty: “The Enterprise? I’d like to get my hands on her ample nacelles, if you’ll pardon the engineering parlance.”
and
Uhura: “I’m impressed, for a moment I thought you were just a dumb hick who only has sex with farm animals.”
Kirk: “Not only.”
It’s important to note that these are the lines Empire chose to single out for praise.
Anyway, nobody expected a lot of crackerjack dialogue from the pens of Orci and Kurtzman, so it’s all about getting this franchise a jump start with excitement and imagination. Empire says that seems to be what JJ Abrams has done.
19 comments
Oh Devin! How do you find the time to shit on movies when you're always laying hot cable on my manly chest?
What's with the constant hate parade on this film, big Devin? It seems to me like it's going to be a good time.
Enough with the Pessimism!!
I wish CHUD was more snarky.
What makes written dialog 'good' to anyone? Would you like "Laugh it up Fuzzball" coming out of Han Solo's mouth if you read it first?
Those quotes are taken out of context. I'm sure they're funny as you watch the movie. Try watching just about every Star Trek movie from part two on–you'll find all sorts of cringe-worthy moments. I just watched part two last month and I can't understand for the life of me why this is considered among the best in the series. It's hokey and melodramatic and other stuff.
After this disaster I hope arrogant JJ who thought he could do Star Trek "better" will apolgize to the fans.
Devin's got a hate boner on for this flick based on two lines of dialogue. WTF?
I, however, hate this movie because it's shot on Panavision cameras and some scenes take place in daylight. Also, there aren't any dragons.
Sgt. Zim – "…Also, there aren't any dragons."
That line made me laugh so hard that I shit a bit.
atinyspeckofdust = win
therefore
Devin = fail
Not sure why some are defending the dreadful dialogue…and I mean shitty in the extreme…I'm sure the movie will be fine in the other departments…
I dunno.. Kirk admitting to fucking animals in a big budget blockbuster seems like gold to me.
What would you expect from a pukebag who was responsible for that cow dung "Cloverfield"? Did you read his horrifying Superman "screenplay"? The one where Lex Luthor can fly and fire lasers from his eyes, and is actually a Kryptonian? (And if you think I'm kidding, just go and read it, if you can survive)
This is exactly what I'm expecting from this movie, which makes me glad that although I liked several Star Trek movies and watched many episodes from the series, I'm not a Trek fan.
Can we possibly make this site more snippy and pessimistic? All this happy rainbows and blow job skittles is making me sick.
Day by day, this site becomes a little more like AICN. You guys used to be my only source for fanboy news. Now, it's like hanging out with a bunch of bitter loners who've lost the capacity to enjoy anything. Sad, really.
Devin wants JJ to fail so bad his hate-boner is draining precious blood from his brain.
God forbid anyone have the audacity to write cheesy dialogue for a Star Trek film. Somebody please tell me where Devin keeps this previously existing magical, mythical version of the perfect Star Trek with all its witty dialogue, oscar calibre acting, seamless effects, and breathtaking production design that JJ can't ever seem to live up to. Nothing quite like a film reviewer that writes all his reviews before seeing the movies. Way to keep it objective and professional, Devin.
This may bit it for Star Trek. After the reviews come in & it tanks, I don't think anyone will be willing to shell out big money for this dead franchise. JJ is going to put the final nail in the coffin, a 150 million dollar nail at that. What a waste of money when there are people in this world without food or even clean water.
I bet if Devin were invited to a press screening of this he would be waxing poetic about it right now while fisting JJ. I think it's awesome that he can only report on what others see and print because no one wants him around. Fucking wizard.
It's hard to wax poetic with someone's cock in your mouth. Ask Devin… he'll tell you.
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