32 posts
Quite frequently I find myself fielding the same questions over and over whenever I am introduced to somebody new. Questions like, "Sweet bastard, what's that smell?"And "Sweet bastard, what the hell's wrong with your teeth?" I haven't figured out the answer… Continue reading
Does the movie-going experience need resuscitating? With the advent of DVD technology, widescreen televisions, ass-shaking home theater sound systems, downloadable movies, microwave popcorn and hand lube, more and more people are opting to stay home instead… Continue reading
Have any of you ever been trapped in a room with a cat in heat? It's not fun. Aside from the ball-shriveling noises tunneling out of their little kitty throats, they tend to get a tad "frisky" with various objects; both mobile and immobile; both living and… Continue reading
In my never-ending quest to hunt down quality television programming, I have been slapped with the realization that I am now whoring out my dignity to several crappy reality game shows. This means that I now suckle the precious milk from the teats of such… Continue reading
While dealing with bouts of paranoia, consuming my weight in Bit O' Honey bars and suffering from "Whiskey dick," I have also been plowing through a stack of videogames purchased eons ago, way back before my nuts dropped. While playing catch-up, I realized… Continue reading
As many CHUD readers can attest to, holiday traveling is about as much fun as working out to a Richard Simmons' Sweatin' To The Oldies tape. At first it's bearable, but around the twenty minute mark, you're reduced to a jiggly, babbling mess, forced to… Continue reading
Time is precious to me, so when I'm not eating salty meats or daydreaming about Bea Arthur, I like to do something constructive. Like spend hours upon hours channel surfing. According to my digital television guide, I have about a thousand different stations… Continue reading
Since I started grad school a couple of weeks ago I haven't been keeping up with world or local events. Not that I keep up on things normally, I mean, most of my information comes from such revered periodicals as Alcoholics Monthly and Geriatric Bed-Sores… Continue reading
Comic-Con finally ended on Sunday and I can now get back to my boring, pathetic life. Before I launch into another Comic-Con screed, I want to make it perfectly clear that I write this all out of affection. I love the Comic-Con…but certain problems need… Continue reading
I've been debating whether or not I should do a write-up for this year's Comic-Con. Many friends of mine are spaced out around the country and I consider you, my kick-ass readers, part of my extended family, so I decided to kill a couple of birds with one… Continue reading
A couple of nights ago I lay stranded on my couch, my innards aching and throbbing, as though my stomach had been pummeled by a sack full of Wintergreen Tic-Tacs. Eventually, I found myself in the throes of a blinding sugar rush, which left me dazed and… Continue reading
In honor of the upcoming San Diego Comic-Con (preview night is Wednesday, July 23rd and the Con runs through Sunday the 27th), I figured I would share the highlights and lowlights of Comic-Con past. I started going to the Con when I was a wee lad, back before… Continue reading
